Morning all,
Am I the only person who is thinking that Grace should take this special opportunity to raid her MIL's house while she is away over Christmas? Take back all your stuff, Grace; if you can find it!
Fabulous idea - I'd be in on that one
Part of the human chain that Essie suggests
Spamar, hope the heart rate has slowed down for you now, and you are feeling OK, hun. Not surprised that the GP didn't know what 'biologistics' are - can't tell you the number of times that I've had to explain to GP's (and various other medically trained peeps) what certain terms used in dementia mean - I guess they can't be experts in every single thing, but so frustrating when you want advice and they just don't know.
Certainly getting into the Christmas spirit here, too, lol! Yesterday morning, youngest and I were wrapping presents (for the dogs, would you believe!) listening to a Christmas playlist and with candles scented with mulled wine and cinnamon burning. The girls then emptied the 'penny jar' - which this year contained over £30! - and headed off to spend it on 'Christmassy bits and bobs', comming back with new baubles in gold, copper and red for the tree, some really sweet fluffy robins to also hang on the tree and with a festive little 'train',which has carriages designed to hold candles. There's still over £10 left, which they have decided that youngest will use to shop for some more 'stuff', they are both quite keen on seeing if she can find a 'Tin soldier' type figure to join the rest of the items that they want to use to decorate around the fireplace
I get what you mean about how you felt over your Mum seeming to be less concerned about your birthday yet going to great lengths over her friends, Slugsta. Mil can be very mixed up about money often now - the current value and cost of things in particular. When she is fretting over what to give her Grandchildren, mostly she talks in terms of 'Will 5 shillings be enough?' , yet where her friends' pressie is concerned, after being told that getting the canvas prints done cost £24, she doesn't bat an eyelid and instead worries that she hasn't spent enough
Mostly, I can laugh it off, but sometimes it does niggle that she gets her priorities so mixed up. Hard not to take it personally! I do hope that you and your Mum enjoy the trip to the garden centre to see the decorations - we are not far from the Grosvenor Garden Centre, which is absolutely stunning to visit when its decked out for Christmas - but its also usually packed out, so I'm unsure whether or not to risk taking Mil, she just isn't good with crowds now
Mil slept a good bit of yesterday morning, coming down at 11 for breakfast then just heading back up to bed without a word to anyone
I was planning Sunday lunch for about 2pm, and she finally got up at 1, whilst the girls were out with their Dad, doing their shopping. Unfortunately, Mil got up wearing her ET hat
Initially, she wasn't too agitated, but just very repetative, asking when she was going home, was OH taking her, should she put her shoes on to go home now, was OH taking her home on the train or was I going to 'lend him' my car? I fudged answering where I could, was gentle about giving excuses when I had to answer directly, but no sooner had I replied then she was off again. By the time OH and the girls got back, she was fixed on the notion that arrangements had been made for her to visit her nephew, P (who lives in Ireland) and no matter how many times we explained that no, she didn't need to put her coat on, that we were not going anywhere 'today', she just kept going on and on with the questions about how she was getting there, and what time was she going and were we coming too? My oldest was lovely , especially, trying to engage Nana in different conversations to change the subject, but not a chance. We managed lunch in relative peace, but as is often the case when Mil finishes her meal, she then stepped up a notch. We had to make the decision that she wouldn't be able to go with OH and I to see oldest off on the train at 4, because she had it fixed in her head that it was
her going on a train - to see P - and we felt a trip to the train station would make things worse - so I had to stay home to watch her instead (made more sense for OH to go, as I couldn't help dau with her heavy luggage).
She stepped up a notch after they left, OH was now her husband again, each time I reminded her that he's her son she would say 'That's right' - but then straight back to how the two of them were going back 'home'. She started to get more and more agitated about where he was and when would he be back and asking me over and over to confirm that when he got back that the two of them would be leaving to either go home or go to P's house. She was getting up, peering out the window, fretting about where he was, trying to get upstairs or heading for the dining room to get her coat and shoes, asking where her case was, claiming that her bag had been stolen and panicking because 'The ferry/train tickets' were in it. I tried telling her that the ferry was cancelled - as per LadyA's suggestion - due to the awful wind and rain that we had yesterday. Nope, she instantly switched to them travelling by train and even insisted that I'd 'promised' to lend my car for them to drive there. When I pointed out that P lives in Ireland, she started to insist that he had moved over to England - years ago! A flipping answer for everything!
By the time OH and youngest got back, I was practically sitting on top of her in the lounge to try and stop her frantic searches for coat, case, shoes and bag. OH wasn't even properly in through the front door before she was stood right in front of him and flapping on about leaving. OH spoke to her very firmly and suggested she either calm down or go to her room - calm was beyond her at this point, I think, so he escorted her upstairs, with a drink and put her TV on, whilst she ranted on making a lot of uncomplimentary remarks about me 'interfering and stopping them leaving'!. She also asked OH if he wanted a divorce, being as he was clearly now carrying on with me! We had perhaps 30 minutes of peace, but then she was off again. OH - knowing I wasn't feeling the best - tried sitting with her in the dining room, but after about 40 minutes, he was just battered from the nagging and constant delusions
I made her a light tea and a cuppa, hoping that would distract, at about 6pm - not a chance. OH sent her back upstairs afterwards. And she came back down again after about 15 minutes and was begging me to help her find her money so she could leave, insisting that P was expecting her and that I couldn't keep her prisoner. OH again marched her upstairs, this time really cross with her as she was now being quite nasty towards me. All quiet afterwards, I took her meds up at 9 - and at 10.30, back down she came, this time insisting that I hadn't given her the sleeping tablet she needs. (I had - but can't say that zopiclone is much use at the moment!). OH got her back upstairs, but then at just before 11 when we were heading to bed, she tried to get back downstairs, insisting it was morning and that she wanted her breakfast!
So the much looked-forward to 'flumping' didn't really happen at all, sadly. I shouldn't have said anything - mentioning it probably jinxed it!
Another foul day here, weatherwise, so once I've got Mil off to day care, whatever I decide to do, ging out won't be part of it, lol! Its lashing it down (so I'm expecting multiple requests to lend Mil a brolley so she doesn't get soaked whilst waiting for her bus/train
) and staying in seems to best option today!
Hope you all have a good day xxxx