Dear Diary!

[Eddcorner]

You may prefer to chew wasps @Eddcorner, but tonight Im going to watch Taskmaster as it makes me laugh

We used to watch QI with Stephen Fry but lost interest at some point... Big Bang Theory, The Conners, The Middle and Modern Family are/were faves. Just started watching Reno 911 which has just sparked mum's interest. I miss 15 to 1 with the original presenter... William G. Stewart??

 

[Neveradullday!]

'Have I Got News For You' is on at 9pm on Dave

 

[Eddcorner]

We‘ve literally just sat down to mum’s favourit hunk Michael Portillo in Singapore 🤣🤣 Shes always happy to co-operate for washing if he follows! I should write and tell him 🤣🤣🤣 I imagine he scores even lower than Eurovision!

Im pretty zonked as she has a mild infection which seems to be leading to an hour of hyper before bed 😴😴 last night was mildly hilarious - she was hosting me (well not me)…realised there was no spare bedroom and then said u can sleep in Rachel’s room - if u don’t mind she hasn’t tidied up 🤣🤣 put me right in my place!

so I will now scroll to find something on Netflix and just put it on - I’m afraid @Eddcorner your mum gets a higher grade of entertainment than mine!

I dislike the man's politics immensely but do enjoy his continental rail trips, Chris Tarrant's Extreme Railway Journeys was brilliant, appreciated his cynicism haha

TV Bribery? If it works it works... Yep I know that feeling of being zombiefied, hope she's sorted soon but at least it's leading to some 'interesting' moments and let you know in no uncertain terms that she's still the boss. Room tidying indeed haha!!

Ah Netflix...

 

[Eddcorner]

We've got Jacob Rees Mogg on now, one of mum's favourite people ("very nice man").
Luckily she's not a Eurovision fan 😃

Oh that man 🤨 His son is an absolute clone of him too. He's too much of a bobblehead for my tastes might be a walking encyclopedia but not very clever. Shhh... don't mention Eurovision.

 

[Eddcorner]

'Have I Got News For You' is on at 9pm on Dave

Again used to be one of our faves but mum lost interest. Does like the Richardson's though. Hmm... oh she's opted for recording of 'Person of Interest'. Violence wins out once again

 

[Eddcorner]

Mum extremely 'conversant' late yesterday evening and taking great pleasure in winding me up and putting me through my paces. Even had some impromptu 'singing' on her part; we have a lot of age appropriate stuff going on but we also have a lot of silly goings on too with many made up tunes/lyrics and routines. It is expected trust me on this... Now I can't recollect when a lot of our more bonkers activities started but it does bring a certain lightness to our daily journey. Oh and mum knows I've always been slightly unhinged anyways haha, it's in the genes!

 

[Eddcorner]

Footspa and pedi planned for mum c/o myself this evening. Funny she didn't like me going anywhere near her feet at the outset but following an arthritis flare up she does appreciate a good foot massage now! Should charge really

 

[sdmhred]

Well if you can do my mum’s toenails without her shrieking you have a job here! Pre dementia she made such a fuss when I came near her toes - the dog growled at me 🤣🤣
that has yet to change here!
im just about to close my work laptop (dont tell) and we will head out for Friday coffee treat 😀😀

 

[Eddcorner]

Well if you can do my mum’s toenails without her shrieking you have a job here! Pre dementia she made such a fuss when I came near her toes - the dog growled at me 🤣🤣
that has yet to change here!

Mum's feet are in pretty good nick for her age thank goodness, toenails..? Ooh, did I have problems at the beginning! She would jerk her foot away at the instant I went to clip or in the process of, I just elevated it placing it on my lap supporting the heel to reduce any movement (a bit dicey for me though). Can still be right tricky but managed after several years to get it down to a fine art. My record? 15 minutes! That doesn't include filing mind haha 😆 That's a whole other world 🤪

And I promise not to tell. Coffee? Sure it's much deserved, enjoy!

 

[Eddcorner]

Ever been hit by a sudden wave of tiredness? Yikes out of nowhere! I usually get by on my four hours with an added half-hourly afternoon doze but the yawning disease has struck 😴 😴 😴 Cup of tea now haha.

 

[jennifer1967]

Ever been hit by a sudden wave of tiredness? Yikes out of nowhere! I usually get by on my four hours with an added half-hourly afternoon doze but the yawning disease has struck 😴 😴 😴 Cup of tea now haha.

coffee probably better. more caffeine!! yawning is catching as well, once one person starts, others do it as well.

 

[Neveradullday!]

Know the feeling, @Eddcorner .
Just gone pretty tired myself.

Going up to my bed for a sleep not an option! Have to wait for mum to go to her bed. She wouldn't be happy!

So my options are put my head back in the chair and catch a few zzzzzzs or lie on the floor.

I sometimes wonder what the first night or two will be like when this is all over. Just to be able to go to bed when I want with no interruptions?

 

[Eddcorner]

Know the feeling, @Eddcorner .
Just gone pretty tired myself.

Going up to my bed for a sleep not an option! Have to wait for mum to go to her bed. She wouldn't be happy!

So my options are put my head back in the chair and catch a few zzzzzzs or lie on the floor.

I sometimes wonder what the first night or two will be like when this is all over. Just to be able to go to bed when I want with no interruptions?

When mum was admitted to hospital for a couple of days I was still stuck in my routine but it might have been due in part to my anxiety of not having her here. I don't think I would know what to do at journey's end!

 

[Neveradullday!]

It'll be like a different world, mate

 

[Eddcorner]

coffee probably better. more caffeine!! yawning is catching as well, once one person starts, others do it as well.

Ooh, I only drank coffee when submitting my dissertation - was hallucinating at the end of the process through lack of sleep (my cushion turned into a hedgehog). Did try energy drinks about six years ago but you're just borrowing time to be paid back later! Dusting... now that'll do it

 

[Eddcorner]

It'll be like a different world, mate

Frightening. Hopefully many years yet fingers crossed 🤞 Can't even visualise it.

 

[Neveradullday!]

Frightening. Hopefully many years yet fingers crossed 🤞 Can't even visualise it.

Let's hope the Alzheimer's Society announce a miraculous cure (even for those in mid stage) in the next couple of months! Our loved ones could return to an independent life!

Sorry @Eddcorner ,I'm living in cloud cuckoo land. 🙂

Anyway, mum seems really tired now, so I can get to my own bed soon. I'll still be checking TP though. 😊

I must say I don't find the future frightening, though.

 

[sdmhred]

I’ve always been nervous about the post caring time. It was something that I was really aware of when I made the choice to care. I worked with a client whose sister cared. When her Dad died she completely broke down and spent all her inheritance living in a Premier Inn as she couldn’t face life 😢 she then ended up homeless when the money ran out and had to live in the local hostel with all sorts! She later died of alcohol complications.

I now ‘bank‘ ideas for post caring so I have a few things I know I would like to do. Am making an effort to keep up with good friends although largely on WhatsApp.

I read here of one chap who put money aside for that time - so I’ve started to do that where I can so I can treat myself.

my caring creeped up throughout covid so my last ‘normal’ day was the day Boris told us to stop going to the pub. One thing is for sure, I’m not going back to the hamster wheel of life in those days. Stopping has helped me appreciate so many of the small pleasures in life that I don’t want to lose.

 

[Neveradullday!]

I’ve always been nervous about the post caring time. It was something that I was really aware of when I made the choice to care. I worked with a client whose sister cared. When her Dad died she completely broke down and spent all her inheritance living in a Premier Inn as she couldn’t face life 😢 she then ended up homeless when the money ran out and had to live in the local hostel with all sorts! She later died of alcohol complications.

I now ‘bank‘ ideas for post caring so I have a few things I know I would like to do. Am making an effort to keep up with good friends although largely on WhatsApp.

I read here of one chap who put money aside for that time - so I’ve started to do that where I can so I can treat myself.

my caring creeped up throughout covid so my last ‘normal’ day was the day Boris told us to stop going to the pub. One thing is for sure, I’m not going back to the hamster wheel of life in those days. Stopping has helped me appreciate so many of the small pleasures in life that I don’t want to lose.

That's sad about your client's sister, @sdmhred, a terrible shame when people fall through the cracks like that.

Anyway, if I win big on the Lottery, I'm going to buy a mansion where ex TP carers can live the simple life if they want! 🙂
Something will crop up (he said hopefully) 🤞

 

[Chizz]

Post caring time. Yes, of course I've thought about it, as we all know it's coming. It's just a question of when, not if. I've even felt guilty sometimes in wishing for it, so my OH hasn't got to continue with her living death. OK at present, but we know the stages are going to move on, and they're not going to get any better.

I've been full time caring for about 6 years (including my wife's cancer before Alz's) and about 2 years ago I even had counselling - 3 sessions - because I found I was grieving for the loss of my wife, whilst she was (and is) alive.

Thinking about it reminds me of The Mamas & The Papas' song "I call your name" -
Don't you know I can't sleep at night?
But just the same
I never weep at night
I call your name

etc

I have friends who have been widowed, nothing to do with dementia. One of them, a he, shut himself away from everyone for about 2 months, before he felt like socialising again. One of them, a she, said her day and night were all mixed up for some while, and she'd find herself waking in the night and getting up etc, and then just following her body, so she'd just sleep when she felt tired, even if it was in the day, until eventually she adjusted. She says she still feels her OH around the house. One friend just seemed to carry on although I'm sure he was hurting inside, but somehow didn't want to show it.
Anyway, there's no right or wrong way of adjusting, and it will be a BIG adjustment. My OH and I have only been together for about 56 years, and I thought it might last!

Sorry for being maudlin.

But sometimes, like the tiredness suddenly grabbing you, the sadness does as well.