Dear Diary!

[Eddcorner]

What do you call a pig with laryngitis?
Disgruntled 😂

Ooh that's bad, deffo a 3/10 so well done but has to get much worse for a podium place I reckon!

 

[Neveradullday!]

I'm working at a pizza shop to get by - I knead the dough.

 

[Eddcorner]

I'm working at a pizza shop to get by - I knead the dough.

4/10 Wrong direction @Neveradullday!

 

[Eddcorner]

On our third Star Trek film of the day II, III and now VI at mum's insistence. Saturday TV rubbish so will flick through our recordings, Clockwork Orange moment with matchsticks regarding ST On the plus side mum is very focused. Hmm, looking forward to my son sending me a video clip of my granddaughter later, mum will really appreciate it too. Always brings a smile to her face

 

[Neveradullday!]

What did the surgeon say to the patient who wanted to close her own incision?
"Suture self" 😂😂

 

[Eddcorner]

What did the surgeon say to the patient who wanted to close her own incision?
"Suture self" 😂😂

Better! Or should I say worse? 3/10

 

[Neveradullday!]

I went to the toy shop and asked the assistant where the Schwarzenegger dolls were.
She replied - "Aisle B, back"

[sorry but there's a couple more!]

 

[canary]

What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it?
Nothing - it just let out a little whine

(Not only is this a bad joke, its also very old!!)

 

[Eddcorner]

What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it?
Nothing - it just let out a little whine

(Not only is this a bad joke, its also very old!!)

1.5/10 What a competitor!

 

[Eddcorner]

I went to the toy shop and asked the assistant where the Schwarzenegger dolls were.
She replied - "Aisle B, back"

[sorry but there's a couple more!]

Bad, very bad! Another 1.5/10. Post away

 

[Neveradullday!]

What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it?
Nothing - it just let out a little whine

(Not only is this a bad joke, its also very old!!)

That's funny @canary because I've been telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes - it's all about raisin awareness.

 

[canary]

There were lots of elephant jokes when I was at school. Things like -

How does an elephant get down from a tree?
Sits on a leaf and waits for autumn

and -

How does an elephant hide in a cherry tree?
He paints his toenails red

 

[Neveradullday!]

There were lots of elephant jokes when I was at school. Things like -

How does an elephant get down from a tree?
Sits on a leaf and waits for autumn

and -

How does an elephant hide in a cherry tree?
He paints his toenails red

10/10 and 8/10 @canary - too good!

 

[Eddcorner]

There were lots of elephant jokes when I was at school. Things like -

How does an elephant get down from a tree?
Sits on a leaf and waits for autumn

and -

How does an elephant hide in a cherry tree?
He paints his toenails red

Oh @canary I thought you had the potential to claim a podium place but you made me laugh 😆 Far too good, need to be much worse...

 

[Eddcorner]

That's funny @canary because I've been telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes - it's all about raisin awareness.

A 4/10 oh dear 🤔

 

[Neveradullday!]

I'm trying to organise a hide and seek game, but good players are hard to find. 🤣🤣

 

[Eddcorner]

I'm trying to organise a hide and seek game, but good players are hard to find. 🤣🤣

Perhaps a 3 or 3.5/10 It's bad but you did raise the bar quite high early on... Still neck and neck with @canary at 1.5/10!

 

[sdmhred]

Keep them coming 🤣🤣

 

[Neveradullday!]

How much did the pirate pay to get his lobes pierced?
A buccaneer 😁

 

[Neveradullday!]

Meanwhile, horror of horrors, I put Eurovision on "just to see the start" and mum's now really enjoying it 😱😱😱😱