This is certainly an interesting thread. When my mum was having difficulty living at home one of the major problems was being on her own 24/7. She really needed someone at her beck and call and prepared to put up with accusations, frustrations and all that comes with dementia. She was walking in front of cars and to be honest the way her life was going I wish she had as she is in 24/7 torment of misery. Sobbing constantly unless someone is there in her face all the time. She is not happy in the home but she was not happy in her own home. You never know what to do for the best. We on TP are a bundle of personalities and that is basically it. I know that when I was caring for my mum the best way I could it was having a massive impact on my husband who tried to be supportive in the best way he could under the circumstances due to my sibling's malicious behaviours but I could not have blamed him to have walked away. I think that it is pretty obvious that most women are carers and am I sexist when I say this but when my husband and I are left with the grandchildren who is it that is left running around making sure little susie does not eat your cactus plants whilst hubby is engrossed in the Tour de France! Sorry but all the men I have met have never had to put someone before themselves first and this is historical/biological who knows. No offence