1. marmarlade

    marmarlade Registered User

    Jan 26, 2015
    183
    hubby has been in care 11 months ,ive just put up the decorations and tree, but it suddenly hit me hubby wont be here for christmas, for the last 53 years we,ve spent christmas together,. so the tears started and the day seemed to get worse ,of course i will see him over the holidays but the big hole just dont seem to go away today so a few more tears,we are taking him to our sons every day of the holiday so im really lucky there,im sure some of you out there are feeling just the same but its so hard
     
  2. jaymor

    jaymor Volunteer Moderator

    Jul 14, 2006
    12,294
    Female
    England
    It is hard Marmarlade, but we will get through it, we always do.

    Take care.
     
  3. disi

    disi Registered User

    Hello marmalade, I know exactly what you mean, my husband has been in care just 6 months, so this will be our first Christmas Day in 53 years also, that he has not been here. I have not put the tree up yet, that will happen on Sunday. I will visit him on the 24th which is celebrated here in Sweden and I will take him to our sons on Christmas Day. Sending you big hugs, as I know only too well what you are going through. xx
     
  4. marmarlade

    marmarlade Registered User

    Jan 26, 2015
    183
    hi Disi it doesnt matter where you live the heart ache is the same,sending you love and hugs to help you get through
     
  5. pamann

    pamann Registered User

    Oct 28, 2013
    2,635
    Kent
    Hello marmalade, l have not put up any decorations, after 55yrs with my hubby l am telling myself its only two days then all this fuss is over, l will be be spending christmas with my hubby in the CH so we will still be together, they have had their decorations up for two weeks, the home is beautiful, l am looking forward to being there. ☺
     
  6. reddollyfood

    reddollyfood Registered User

    Apr 28, 2015
    36
    Same here Marmalade. But I do admire you putting up decorations - I can't bring myself to put any up this year. I've decorated my husband's room in the nursing home and plan to spend Christmas Day with him there before going to my daughters. But it will be our first Christmas apart in 45 years and also I know he'll never be in this house ever again. Luckily he doesn't seem to mind being in the home, doesn't get upset but I can see him slipping away from me.
     
  7. Dolly Daydream

    Dolly Daydream Registered User

    Oct 13, 2014
    8
    Know how you are feeling, my husband has been in care 2 yrs and I still feel the same. i often wish I could take him home,but know deep down that I would not be able to cope. I will also be spending Christmas Day at the care home with my oh. I visit every day. He has Alzheimer's and vascular dementia. We have been married 46 yrs it is hard when you are on your own don't think I will ever stop feeing guilty.
     

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