So bizarre !

[Grace L]

Moring everyone...

Oh AnnM, I'm lost for words ...school and MiL situation.

One of my useless invisible in laws was married to a teacher. They have always hated the job.
Years ago we were at their house , and I overheard a conversation they were having on the phone with a colleague.
They were working out how many 'sick days' they had left to take off school, and where they were going to go.
They told me that all teachers in their school takes off the maximum number of sick days !
A lot of staff go off on extended sick leave (full pay) ...and there is nothing the school can do.
I'm lost for words at the teachers response to your situation.


AnnM, MiL ..... I've had nursing staff say to me 'I don't know how you do this' ...
How is it that a ward full of staff and support couldn't 'cope' with my husband, but I was expected to cope at home alone?
I'm glad MiL is not coming home to you (I mean that in the nicest possible way) ...
I hope you find somewhere close to you, but if not then Chester is a nice place to be.


Slugsta, Yes, I'm still moving, that seems to be the plan. After knee ops/ recovery.
Move down to my sisters , then take time to find a suitable forever home.


Home Problems....
One of my neighbours has moved (suddenly, not sure what happened) and rented their flat out to a friend/ retired couple.
This couple are making a lot of problems for the rest of us , always complaining about something.
I cant make a big deal out of it , or complain as when I sell I have to mention disputes on the sellers information form.

One of the things they don't like is where their designated car spaces are, and want mine.
We have our own 2 bays, then plenty of visitor space. This couple want my 2 bays !

Anyway.... Jokingly.... Does anyone remember the old Fawtly Towers 'sketch' when a Doctor says ....
'I'm a Doctor .... and I want my sausages?' ...
This man is a retied Doctor, and says to me ... 'I am a Doctor, and I want your parking bays'...
I said, I think not.... park in your own spaces... He looks me up and down, and says but ... I'm a Doctor.
They don't like any of the spare parking bays, as you can get bird poo on the cars ....

Another thing they don't like is the noise of the lawnmower, and want the gardener to check with them its OK to start mowing the lawn at 10am, as they sometimes sleep in.
Quite a few other things like that.... sooo many complaints.

This couple (renting the property) are not really entitled to complain about maintenance / gardening issues.
I live in a large shared converted house (Flats) . We have always done our own property maintenance.
This couple even want the gardener to collect their recycling and rubbish for them !
I think the last flat they lived in they had someone do this, so expect the same level of 'service'.

Its getting me down, I loved living here, but now I'm looking forward to leaving.
We all get on here, no one has ever really come in an upset the 'household'.

Rant over..... will try not to mention them again.


I'm seeing Doc (GP) next week. I've been taking extra vitamins to make sure my blood test is OK.

My appetite still (its been weeks) isn't great. I am eating , just not enjoying food.
Its like when I was caring for my husband, eating, but not enjoying food.
I feel run down, depressed (not diagnosed) , and I cant stop worrying about MiL.
Other In-Laws 'situation' not helping either.... I might tell you about them another day.

 

[cragmaid]

Ann, with the current rate of decline in MIL's condition, I would suggest that it could be months before the hospital feel that MIL is fit to be transferred to EMI or Nursing care. I am sure you will have lots of time to visit different homes and it could even sadly transpire that she is never fit enough to leave the hospital.
Vis a Vis the school debacle....have you considered contacting the media?

 

[Katrine]

"He looks me up and down, and says but ... I'm a Doctor."

"As a doctor you'll understand why I need my parking spaces. I've been waiting 2 years for a knee operation......
Perhaps you could help me with that?"

 

[Grace L]

Katrine....

New neighbour is only miffed because I have the first 2 parking slots (I live in flat 1).
He has 2 slots (flat 4) a few car spaces down, next to the spare parking slots, which he also does not like.
I've always had first 2 slots allocated , they are on the deeds.

He wants to see his cars out of his kitchen window, but can only do so if he is in my slots.
One of the other flats has a son with a van (and family car), and if the son /van stay over, the van blocks (visually) his cars.

Doctor (retired) .... is obviously used to getting his way, and not used to 'a woman' telling him no.
I said OK, he could have my second space, but if a friend comes over then I want it back. He only wants them both....
but .... I'm a Doctor , I want those 2 spaces...

So petty, and not really worth fighting over.... I've got enough other problems to cope with.

He knows I've been waiting for my knee Op, not that I have that much further to walk if he takes up my parking spaces.
Its just the attitude of him and his wife.... expecting me/ us to pander to his wishes.

Not quite ready to sell my home just yet..... and I don't need little problems becoming bigger.

One of my neighbours used to be big 'on TV' . He never said .... but I'm XXX on TV, I want those 2 parking spaces... as if to say I am more important than you.

I'm not the only one who does not like new neighbours, have not stopped complaining since they moved in.

 

[cragmaid]

" But I'm a Doctor"....brings the reply from me of " so what?"
( probably followed by the endearment....." get stuffed") I am so known for my warmth!!!!!!

 

[Spamar]

I'm a doctor too, but my speciality is salt marshes. May I have a parking place? Anyway, didn't you say he was retired?
I would tell him to go and operate on himself!

Just thought, I have a blue badge, may I have a marked place on the road?

He doesn't deserve a civil word!

 

[cragmaid]

Grace...I forgot to mention that you might want to get a little man with a screwdriver in.. ... to remove the sign from your front door.... the sign which reads " Very Nice Lady Lives Here" and replace it with the one reading " Wadda you want" or even the one reading " NO Chance"

 

[Amy in the US]

FIL died this afternoon. Details to follow. Wish we could have gotten him out of hospital as I know that was his wish but he had good care and some of the best nurses and staff I've ever seen. Thinking of all of you.

 

[Ann Mac]

FIL died this afternoon. Details to follow. Wish we could have gotten him out of hospital as I know that was his wish but he had good care and some of the best nurses and staff I've ever seen. Thinking of all of you.

I'm so, so sorry Amy Sending you and the rest of the family much love and sympathy - will be thinking of you all xxxx

 

[Spamar]

Oh Amy, I so sorry for you. (((((Hugs)))))

 

[Batsue]

Amy, so sorry to hear about your FIL, sending my condolences to you and your family xxx.

 

[RedLou]

Amy - so sorry to hear your news. Sending you a bunch of hugs. I have to say - you've been an amazing daughter-in-law and I hope and trust you have many happy memories of him. Hope your OH is okay. xx

 

[CeliaW]

So sorry to read this Amy. Do remember to also take care of yourself whilst you are busy taking care of others. Hugs xx

 

[Grace L]

Amy.... sorry to hear you news. xxxx

 

[jugglingmum]

Amy - sorry to hear your news - you did the best you could as a daughter in law

 

[canary]

Amy - Im so sorry.

Grace - I so agree with cragmaid, but I understand that you will be leaving soon and want a quiet life.

(((hugs))) Ann. I had hoped things would be better after MIL went into hospital.

 

[cragmaid]

Oh Amy, I'm so sorry, but in a sad way I am relieved for you. These next few days and weeks are going to be difficult, but soon you will be able to return to your own home and some good memories of a man you were so fond of.
Take care my friend.x.

 

[Spamar]

Right!
Ann, a permanent consultant, whatever will they think of next!!? About time,I think.
I think the best home for mil,not the nearest. I dont think many homes will cope. Fully agree with dottyd.
I'm appalled at behaviour of school re dau. As I have no kids, no experience of modern schools, but from what you and JM are saying ( and step grand dau was also bullied) I'm just amazed, stupefied, struck dumb at the goings on in schools today.
If there was conflict, they should all be punished, not let 2 go completely free to pursue their rotten ways.
Hope she survives D of E today!

JM, glad the iron tablets are working, hope she'll feel really better soon. Congrats to son on sats, he's like me, do well in worse subjects! I hope he enjoyed being a crocodile!
Has dau had repeat blood tests yet? And the counselling?
Finally,hope you have a good street party! The weather here's OK, hope it's not raining /cold for you!

Amy, as I said, so sorry for you, and DH. Watch what you say in the next few days! Are you staying long,or waiting until after the funeral? Glad you have got a good relationship with SIL. It will help a lot, I feel.

Slugsta, hope Skye is settling. No cats for me! Prefer dogs!! I don't mind cats if they're somewhere else, not in MY garden!
I'm used to the usual pain, it's just when it goes up a notch or two!

Grace, nice to see you back. Sorry about the arthritis and knee. Is there any chance of you going on what's called around here as the 'short' list? It means you can come to hospital at short notice and take a slot where someone's cancelled? If it's possible, it works well,I did it for both my ops. One I had several days notice, the other a couple of hours.
We moved 3 weeks and 3 days after my knee op! Found out on a Thursday late pm we were moving on Monday/Tuesday . Too much gear for a one day move! Too soon, but managed!

Think I've covered everybody!
I am more and more pleased I decided to not to have the dog, thanks all.
My physio has gone really well! One ankle already has 20 degrees more movement! At least he knows I'm actually doing the exercises! Result is that I've got two more to do this month, including one for my balance. Interestingly, I am better one side than the other! I'm hoping that before long I will be able to get out of the passenger door of a car, and put socks on easily!!!

Thank you for all the nice things you have said. My mantra is that if I can't change it, forget and move on. It's evolved cos of lots of things that have happened in the past and i discovered at an early stage that life isn't fair! So, if I can't change it, I move on. Not that this latest road hasn't had its bumps, but so far, I've got over them. Lots of friends have helped as well. I used to say I had a cousin for every problem, well, there were 20 of us! Now a lot of them are dead or in Cornwall, I'm lucky to have lots of loyal friends and good neighbours, who have been a godsend!

I do feel much better, even my brain is working occasionally!

And you all, of course, especially Ann, JM and RedLou.

And, of course,I'm doing my bit being one of the supporters of my friend with cancer. Payback!

Have a good weekend, everybody.

 

[Izzy]

FIL died this afternoon. Details to follow. Wish we could have gotten him out of hospital as I know that was his wish but he had good care and some of the best nurses and staff I've ever seen. Thinking of all of you.

I'm sorry to read your news. Thinking of you and your family.

 

[LadyA]

Sorry to hear about your FIL, Amy.

Ann, my heart could break for your poor MIL. Makes me realise how very lucky William and I were, that the combination of risperidone, trazadone and Exelon worked so well for him. He was able to enjoy a reasonably good quality of life (apart from the natural progression of his illness) at home, for over two years longer than he would otherwise have been. And as for the school situation - I just don't know what to say! Hugs to you.