Refusing Food, PEG Feed, Palliative Care, Starting to Break

[Pennie]

Morning Stephanie (well, it is here)

Checking in on you, and feeling awful that you are feeling so alone - we are here and watching out for you, albeit from a distance.

Thinking of you so much and hoping for a better day for you and your dear dad.

((((big hugs)))
xx

 

[lilysmybabypup]

This evening my darling dad left this world and is free from the despair of Alzheimer's. Thank you so much to all the dear people who offered such compassion.
Stephanie, xxx

 

[60's child]

Oh Stephanie
You have my heartfelt sympathy. Words are failing me now Thinking of you and your family. Your Dad is at peace now.

 

[turbo]

Hello Stephanie, I am so sorry to read that your dear dad has died. My sincere condolences to you and your family.


turbo

 

[angecmc]

I am so sorry Stephanie, my condolences to you and your family, you were a great support to your Dad and your family, please try to find time for yourself now and take lots of care.xx

Ange

 

[Mamsgirl]

Dear Stephanie,
So very sorry your Dad has gone.
Don't know what else to say,
Love Toni x

 

[starryuk]

Stephanie,

Nothing I can say except that I am very very sorry. I just hope that the sure knowledge that your dad knew you were by his side every step of the way can bring you some comfort.
So sad. Look after yourself and your mum.

xx

 

[Pigeon11]

Really sorry to hear about your Dad Stephanie. I hope that you can all take comfort that he's not suffering now. Thinking of you all xxx

 

[LYN T]

Stephanie

So so sorry to read the very sad news, but glad he has now been released from this terrible disease.

You have been so very brave but wishing you strength for the time ahead.

Love from Lyn

 

[nellbelles]

Stephanie

My sincere condolences to you and your family.

Please never lose sight of the fact that no one could ever have done more for their dad, I hope that thought can sustain you in the coming days.

Love and (((HUGS)))
Helen xx

 

[Izzy]

Oh Stephanie I've just seen your post. I am so sorry to read your news. Your love for your dad shone through all of your posts. I am sure he was amazingly proud of you. Sending my condolences and wishing you strength for the future. xx

 

[Eternity]

Stephanie,

I am so sorry for your loss. The world would be a better place if we all loved and cared as you did.

xx

 

[lilysmybabypup]

Such lovely words, thank you so much. Your kindness and support along the way can never be underestimated. I'm so glad that this wretched disease can't break the connection and spirit of humanity. You have all been beyond kind and I hope your own experiences will be lightened in some way by this wonderful relationship. Our family spent a very special evening with Dad last night, some tears, some laughter, and loads of love, all the things taught through the wonderful example of my mother and father. What a legacy. I love you so much my sweet daddy.

Stephanie, xxx

 

[Pennie]

Oh dear Stephanie, I am so sorry to hear your sad news. He is free now and you were there for him. Hold that love in your heart and may it comfort you in the coming days.

Please accept my sincere condolences
Pennie xx

 

[Mamsgirl]

Thinking of you as the evening draws in. You sound like such a lovely and loving family x

 

[Noorza]

This evening my darling dad left this world and is free from the despair of Alzheimer's. Thank you so much to all the dear people who offered such compassion.
Stephanie, xxx

I am so sorry for your loss but relieved that your Dad's despair has gone. It's a hard journey for everyone affected by dementia.

 

[Pottypeg]

I have just sat and read through your posts, first of all I am so sorry for your loss, sending you love & hugs.

I am sitting on my settee with tears streaming down my face as my dad is now refusing food and only sips of water, he has lost 6kg in two weeks and I have not let myself go until now, I think I needed to, my mum is not coping well and feels as if she let dad down by allowing him to go into an assessment unit, tried telling her she hasn't but she says that doesn't help, she is finding it difficult to accept how ill dad is, you were so brave and caring, I hope I have 10% of your compassion.

 

[lilysmybabypup]

Thank you so much for the words of comfort from all of you, they're so uplifting.

Pottypeg, I really feel the weight of responsibility where I need to be so mindful of what I say and share in such a place. I often worry that I'm saying things that will cause unnecessary distress to the people who find themselves in a similar situation.

I am sure you have compassion in equal measure, otherwise you wouldn't be moved or affected by what you've read and your own experiences. Please don't sell yourself short. I'm not quite clear about your dad, since I'm not familiar with what being in an assessment unit means. I really felt I was floundering about trying to work out any possible causes for Dad's lack of appetite. He had really been eating much less for several months leading up to his hospitalisation, so it may have just been the way he was headed regardless of his location or possible causes.

I would ask for a variety of possibilities to be explored for your dad, oral thrush, any stomach or digestive issues, perhaps even a mild depression, infections, or combinations of medications which may cause nausea or lack of appetite. I really don't know what else to suggest or say other than, every person is different and so is their path and progress so please don't feel so distressed. I'm so sorry this thread has caused you so much sorrow and I really wish you, your mum and your dad all the very best.

Stephanie, xxx

 

[Pottypeg]

Thank you so much for the words of comfort from all of you, they're so uplifting.

Pottypeg, I really feel the weight of responsibility where I need to be so mindful of what I say and share in such a place. I often worry that I'm saying things that will cause unnecessary distress to the people who find themselves in a similar situation.

I am sure you have compassion in equal measure, otherwise you wouldn't be moved or affected by what you've read and your own experiences. Please don't sell yourself short. I'm not quite clear about your dad, since I'm not familiar with being in

Dad is virtually blind, cannot stand, double incontinent and tends to be quite vocal and is whining all the time, we have been turned down by one NH because of his noises and are thinking of having him re-assessed, thank you for your kind words.

 

[lilysmybabypup]

Dad is virtually blind, cannot stand, double incontinent and tends to be quite vocal and is whining all the time, we have been turned down by one NH because of his noises and are thinking of having him re-assessed, thank you for your kind words.

Sorry, I accidentally hit send before I had finished my reply so it's a little longer now that it has been edited.

The first section Dad went into had many residents who were similar to your dad. It sounds like he really needs the type of care that's found in a NH, just a matter of finding the right one.

I'm so sorry for the situation in which you find yourself, it really is horrible to feel so helpless, isn't it? If only we could wave a wand and restore our loved ones to their former selves. Sadly, we can only do so much and no more.

Stephanie, xxx