I will try and be brief, my eldest sibling sent me a random message wanting to know if it would be okay to take our dad abroad on holiday with his family. This sibling has never gone away with dad even when he was well so quite how he will cope now that he has mixed dementia is beyond me. This sibling has only ever been exposed to dad for a couple of hours or less every three months or so. He doesn't see the incontinence, the nocturnal wandering or just the routine stuff that anyone caring for anyone with dementia deals with on a daily basis. To the best of my knowledge he would have no understanding of communicating well with him and keeping him content and anxiety free. Dad has a clear cut routine and a good support network. Even I wouldn't take him away now as it would be too disruptive to him and far to stressful for me.
I would suggest that I have a very poor relationship with this sibling who has accused me of all sorts of horrible things including siphoning off dads money. Our parents, for whatever reason did not discuss their business with my siblings, appointed me as POA and told me to keep their business confidential. I am very good at keeping a confidence.
When our dads state of cognitive decline started to become obvious my siblings started to ask questions regarding wills and finances. I gave them a stock answer that our parents affairs were in order and I had POA. This did not go down well. A year ago, almost to date, Eldest sibling told me via email that I would not receive any assistance with our dad unless I disclosed our parents financial affairs which I refused to do. Eldest sibling stated that dad promised him money bla bla bla. I live with Dad and am his next of kin and main carer. I am spending dads money on his carers and adapting his home to make it safe and accommodate his needs. I can without doubt justify any expenditure I have made.
I want to hide under a my duvet because I don't want a confrontation.
Any advice greatly appreciated x
I would suggest that I have a very poor relationship with this sibling who has accused me of all sorts of horrible things including siphoning off dads money. Our parents, for whatever reason did not discuss their business with my siblings, appointed me as POA and told me to keep their business confidential. I am very good at keeping a confidence.
When our dads state of cognitive decline started to become obvious my siblings started to ask questions regarding wills and finances. I gave them a stock answer that our parents affairs were in order and I had POA. This did not go down well. A year ago, almost to date, Eldest sibling told me via email that I would not receive any assistance with our dad unless I disclosed our parents financial affairs which I refused to do. Eldest sibling stated that dad promised him money bla bla bla. I live with Dad and am his next of kin and main carer. I am spending dads money on his carers and adapting his home to make it safe and accommodate his needs. I can without doubt justify any expenditure I have made.
I want to hide under a my duvet because I don't want a confrontation.
Any advice greatly appreciated x