Fizzie, perhaps I should have qualified that by explaining that my mother was 90 at the time and had indeed had a very good life prior to the dementia. In no way did I mean to infer that anyone with dementia was not worth caring for. I worded it very badly and apologise for that.
I was trying to get across that I empathised with Linbrusco about giving more time and energy to the PWD than their own family who had their own illnesses. I did hope that anyone might read it all in context that I am still grieving my husband and and feeling tremendous guilt that the dementia came before what turned out to be his final days.
BR x
Ahhhh I understand now. I am so sorry that you are grieving for your husband, my husband died two years ago and I do understand. Please don't feel guilty - he would not have wanted you to feel that in the same way if your positions were reversed you would not want him to feel bad. He would want you to be sad but move on with your life to happier times and keep the happy memories of all those good times you have together!