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Newbie here with early onset Alzheimer's Disease

Daryl2510

Registered User
+++update+++

I lost my sister last week, sadly... it was sudden and unexpected and her death has come as quite a shock.

Today, I have received a text and email from my GP and hospital asking me for my own health and safety, and to save burden to an already crippled NHS system, so self-isolate for 12 weeks, in order that I may not catch this virus that is causing untold misery to people all around the world.

A few days ago, we received news that my mum's dementia is worsening and is causing certain organs in her body to fail - the doctors have said that she has probably got less than a month to survive - her carehome is in lockdown, so I can't visit her and now I've been advised that I cannot leave my home anyway for at least another 3 months.

Because of all this, I will probably miss my sister's funeral, I won't be able to be there when my own mother dies and more than likely will have to miss her funeral as well...

I'm saying all this not for sympathy...

I just want people to try and be kind to each other - life is precious, and so are the people that live them... show each other respect, not only here, but in real life too.

Peace and love,


Daryl x
 

Shedrech

Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
9,250
Yorkshire
oh @Daryl2510 such sad news
your family really are having a hard time

might you talk with the manager of your mum's home and see what might be done about compassionate visits

thank you for thinking of others at such a time ... my heart goes out to you
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
13,418
South coast
Im so sorry (((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))

I think a lot of care homes who are in lockdown are making exceptions for End of Life. It might be worthwhile finding out if your mums care home will do this.
 

Daryl2510

Registered User
My sister's funeral...

I buried my sister on Wednesday - it was a very surreal funeral - beautiful (with the weather and service), sad and funny all rolled into one. I actually felt like a character playing a part in an episode of the Twilight Zone!

Because of the government restrictions on congregations, the funeral was limited to immediate family members only and it could only be a graveside service, as all churches have been closed. But this added to the beauty of her funeral, because it was a gloriously sunny and warm day, the birds were singing in the cemetery and the limited number of family members there, made it very touching and moving.

I made sure that my Mam had a wreath for her daughter too, so as it could include her on the day, even though she is in lockdown in her carehome and totally unaware that her beloved daughter has even died... I think that is a blessing in disguise as she would have been devastatingly heartbroken had she been in full capacity to understand. My wreath from myself and my siblings was a pillow done with blue flowers and Sister overlayed on it - she loved blue.

90914021_10158357517471802_4466802464997244928_n.jpg
 

Daryl2510

Registered User
My Mam is at end of life...

I had a call two nights ago to go and say goodbye to her in her care home... She was in a lot of distress but wasn't responsive to my voice. I had to dress up in full PPE equipment and have my temperature taken, as they made an exceptional decision for me to be allowed to say goodbye to her because she has been there so long and over the years have built up an incredible bond with some of the staff there - I thank them with all my heart for allowing me to be with her, one last time.

The nurse came and after discussions with me and my stepsister, decided it was time for her to start her 'end of life' medication that had been placed by her GP when she came out of hospital 6 months ago. So she was given an injection of morphine, which had allowed her to go into a coma in which she is now comfortable but will not recover from.

It is just a matter of time now... I'm putting this status as I've decided to let you all know now this is how it is.

I love her, I will always love her and I'm just waiting now until it is time.
 

canary

Registered User
Feb 25, 2014
13,418
South coast
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Im glad you managed to see her one last time
Look after yourself during this twilight zone
 

LynneMcV

Registered User
May 9, 2012
3,975
south-east London
I am so sorry to hear your news @Daryl2510 . I am glad you were able to see your mam that last time and that you can take some comfort in knowing that she still has people/staff around who have become like family to her. It's not easy though - and I wish you strength to see you through this horrible time.
 

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