New to the journey

[Brooker60]

So I am new to the group. My dad 77 diagnosed with mixed dementia the same week my mum died. So we are exactly 8 weeks into the diagnosis and loss of my mum. He buries his head in the sand kind of guy! He acknowledges that mum has gone. Very insular, does not want to join any groups. I have ensured that someone goes in daily to try and avoid older people loneliness.
I feel like I have lost both parents but one is still here.
Any advice greatly received

 

[Grannie G]

Welcome @Brooker60

Condolences on the loss of your mother and sympathy on the state of your dad`s health. This is a lot for you to process. Be kind to yourself.

He buries his head in the sand kind of guy!

I would allow him to be as he is. You won`t know how grief will be affecting him if he is not used to expressing his feelings and if he is relatively calm, I`d accept it.

It`s good of you to ensure your dad gets a daily visit from someone. You can also make sure he has easy access food even if it is on show on the work tops rather than in cupboards where he might not remember to look.

 

[JoannePat]

Hi @Brooker60 I am so sorry for your loss and the diagnosis of your father.

I too lost my mum nearly three years ago and shortly afterwards my father started showing dementia signs.

He has never shown any grief or even wanted to share stories of my mum, he only ever talks about himself and always shows concerns for anyone but me (Thanks I am the primary carer, although we do not live with him).

You may find that your dad talks to the person who pops in to see him, have you spoken to them? Also, he may not want to join a group but could you maybe go with him? I go to a carers support group with my dad, I can exchange stories and worries with other carers and he sits with volunteers playing cards and dominoes.

Its such a hard journey for both PWD and us, the carers, the loved ones.

Take care of yourself,

Jxx