Thought I'd join this forum for some advice and support. My Mum is steadily getting worse though still able to live in her own home, but extremely forgetful, repeats everything continually, gets very angry with me when I try to clean her house or help her take pills, and is always accusing my brother of taking things she has mislaid. A few months ago she met a man her age, who stays with her regularly and seems very good at persuasion. He has now arranged for someone local to give a quote on installing some more heating in her home. She has always preferred a cool home with heaters as she wishes, and I suspect the extra heating is to make him more comfortable when he stays, she has said she's made no firm decisions about the heating yet. My brother and I can't stand him, he gives us the creeps, but she seems happy, he is company and they laugh a lot, so we should be pleased, but now he is trying to muscle in on Christmas too. We always have a close family Christmas, but his daughters suggested he could spend it with Mum, my brother said no and explained why, and they have not replied. I spoke with the partner today and said the same, and that if Mum would like him to stay after Christmas that is fine, but as she is steadily going downhill we would like her to ourselves this Christmas, as we don't know what the next one will hold for us all. However, my brother said the same to him earlier in the week and he still maintains that Mum wants him to come for Christmas. Am I being really uncharitable ? We don't feel we can stop him coming as it's Mum's life, though when he's not around she has difficulty remembering who he is. In between the tense times when he's there and I call, we have some tetchy times, but also some lovely times out in the car visiting places she likes. Any help would be gratefully received.