I lost my mum two weeks ago and she was buried two days ago. She was 101 years old. She was in a care home for six years and knew me up until covid and lockdown. For best part of 18 months I didn’t see her, then only through a window. She suffered greatly after that as she no longer knew me whereas she did before. I was with her at the end and she didn’t suffer it was peaceful. I looked after my mum for ten years, first as a long distance carer in her own home, then she lived with myself and hubby for 3 before I could no longer cope. I feel like I’ve been under a cloud and my mental health suffered terribly through looking after her and not looking after me. I loved my mum dearly, we were very close and did much together but now I feel a relief and I don’t understand it. I have cried for my mum over the years many times and of course when she passed, but now I’m sleeping well, and I feel bad for not feeling bad if you see what I mean. Maybe it’s because I’d lost her long ago but I do know she’s at peace and with my dad which is all she would’ve wanted. Does this make sense? Xx