I knew that one day I would be posting in this section but didn't really expect for things to happen so fast. Two weeks ago Mum started to constantly pee herself (more than usual). So we thought UTI, got a district nurse to visit and Mum was given antibiotics. Mum perked up at the weekend but last Monday was extremely 'out of it' and Dad couldn't get her to move, she had become very rigid. As Dad had the flu bug, my sister and I went around to help get Mum ready for bed but as she couldn't get up the stairs, we made up the sofa bed in the living room for them. However Mum's legs gave way and she collapsed so we called 999 and got an ambulance out. After literally 24 hours in A&E the hospital found Mum a bed as Mum was now showing signs of having a chest infection (which then turned into pneumonia).
We are super lucky that our hospital has recently opened a separate building away from the main hospital and this ward is specifically for dementia/elderly patients who will not be given life-saving care. It is so different from a general ward - a cross between a hospice and a cottage hospital. No machines with loud beeps, visitors can come and go as they please, families can stay overnight and people can bring their pets to visit loved ones. There is a kitchen for people to help themselves to refreshments, food is provided for visitors if they are staying a long time and there is a lovely conservatory for people to sit in to get away from the hospital beds. There is also a little pet therapy dog to bring comfort to patients (and visitors!). All the staff are dementia aware and so kind.
So Mum was on a drip for fluid and antibiotics and the last time we were able to feed her was Tuesday evening. However despite their best attempts, the Dr decided on Sunday that it wasn't fair on Mum to continue as she is not responding and can't swallow. So today she is in a private room with a syringe driver full of morphine and anti-anxiety meds to keep her comfortable. We arranged for Mum's older sister to travel down from Cambridge today to say goodbye as Mum could pass at any time.
It's funny how quickly things have changed. A couple of weeks ago we had finally persuaded Dad to accept having carers come in to help with washing/dressing Mum and he had also made an appointment to try Mum again with daycare (this time in a carehome). However none of this came to pass as then Mum got her first UTI and everything snowballed.
Don't really know how to feel. As a family we have been saying for a long while now that we don't want Mum to go on as her life was full of anxiety and wanting to be with her parents. We do want Mum to be at peace and out of the grip of this cruel illness but now that it is coming to an end, it does feel like time is speeded up. I guess no matter how much you think you are prepared for it, you never really are.
We are super lucky that our hospital has recently opened a separate building away from the main hospital and this ward is specifically for dementia/elderly patients who will not be given life-saving care. It is so different from a general ward - a cross between a hospice and a cottage hospital. No machines with loud beeps, visitors can come and go as they please, families can stay overnight and people can bring their pets to visit loved ones. There is a kitchen for people to help themselves to refreshments, food is provided for visitors if they are staying a long time and there is a lovely conservatory for people to sit in to get away from the hospital beds. There is also a little pet therapy dog to bring comfort to patients (and visitors!). All the staff are dementia aware and so kind.
So Mum was on a drip for fluid and antibiotics and the last time we were able to feed her was Tuesday evening. However despite their best attempts, the Dr decided on Sunday that it wasn't fair on Mum to continue as she is not responding and can't swallow. So today she is in a private room with a syringe driver full of morphine and anti-anxiety meds to keep her comfortable. We arranged for Mum's older sister to travel down from Cambridge today to say goodbye as Mum could pass at any time.
It's funny how quickly things have changed. A couple of weeks ago we had finally persuaded Dad to accept having carers come in to help with washing/dressing Mum and he had also made an appointment to try Mum again with daycare (this time in a carehome). However none of this came to pass as then Mum got her first UTI and everything snowballed.
Don't really know how to feel. As a family we have been saying for a long while now that we don't want Mum to go on as her life was full of anxiety and wanting to be with her parents. We do want Mum to be at peace and out of the grip of this cruel illness but now that it is coming to an end, it does feel like time is speeded up. I guess no matter how much you think you are prepared for it, you never really are.