Medically fit for discharge

[Kevinl]

Deprivation of Liberty Safeguarding Order, a legal mechanism by which someone can be detained.
It is a free country so some legal basis for detaining must be in place.
Some people leave out the S at the end, that's the important bit, safeguarding, whether it be to protect them from themselves or others who may be at risk.
K

 

[canary]

The point about a DoLS is that it can only be used if someone has lost capacity and it also shows a level of confusion that is unlikely to be managed at home.
So if the hospital has had to apply for a DoLS while he is in there this is more evidence that you cannot look after him at home.

 

[Pollywobble]

Oh @Pollywobble

This is totally unacceptable that you are having to do this when he is in hospital. Unfortunately they will come to rely on your good nature and further try to get him home.

Have you anyone who can help advocate for you? You need to go home to sleep. They need to get agency staff in to have him on one to one staffing…..which they can do…but you are saving their budget. Look after yourself….

You are right @sdmhred . I am staying simply because my man is clinging to me. Once he

So sorry to read this @Pollywobble . Keep
On pushing for an assessment bed, as that is what is obviously needed.
Thinking of you and giving you a virtual hug {{{@Pollywobble}}}

Thank you @Sarasa. I will and thank you for the hug.

 

[Jaded'n'faded]

Can you contact PALS at the hospital and get them to intervene?

 

[Firecatcher]

Thank you for your kind reply. There seems little talk of anything, but him going home. They look surprised that nothing is in place. I just don't know how to get help, although I have tried desperately. I'd given up trying.
You're right about thinking of myself. That doesn't seem to be factored in at all. I've spent 3 months in semi darkness ( due to his eye conditions) and barely leaving the house (as he needs constant attention.) A care home seems my only way forward, but there has only been talk of our home. Hence I'm confused!

Have you stood your ground and said you are not prepared to have your husband home. You really do have to be absolutely brutal and state your case otherwise it’s assumed that you’re willing and able to care for someone.

 

[Banjomansmate]

Maybe you should say to the Social worker or Doctor who say he is OK to be discharged home that you hope they will admit and accept responsibility when he kills you!
I am so sorry that you are put in this ridiculous position when basic logic and common sense says that there is no way he can be sent home. My thoughts are with you.

 

[Kevinl]

Not so, a DoLS is used when someone may have temporarily lost capticity, doesn't have to be to be a total lack of capacity for life.
Me I'm sat here in my kitchen, alone at home with a copy of my DoLSO form 4 in front of me, goes back to 2020, maybe I do lack capacity (not) but it's work for me tomorrow same as always.
So very much not the case that one has to lack capacity permenatly, just at the time when its the best option short of sectioning. K

 

[Pollywobble]

Well my resolve is definitely set now. I've spent the night in a chair by his bedside. I couldn't walk away as he had been waiting all day without food and drink and the only comfort he got was me holding his hand. He's been hallucinating all night and having episodes of psychotic delusions, as well as delirium, poor man.

Suddenly he shot out of bed dragging the drip machine over, shouting help and trying to reach the window. He actually punched me in the face! Although it didn't hurt, I will be fighting the system to find him somewhere rather than him going home.

Thank you for all your support overnight. Its been a long one!

 

[maisiecat]

Hi @Pollywobble , I was in this situation last June although it wasn't ever contemplated my husband could return home even though I presented a care plan.
I hope my story will give you hope because we all need that. My husband is in a good Dementia Home he no longer hallucinates although he remains delusional. I haven't seen a psychotic episode for 3 months and our relationship is warm and companiable again.
You are in the fight of your life for your person because I was. These are the things that give you weapons. Use the words vulnerable adult again and again. Paint a picture of the dangers around your local area if he got out in the middle of the night and if you are told to lock the door explain graphically what happens when a frightened, pyschotic person is locked in.
Safeguarding is another key phrase and you need to use direct statements."Are you taking responsibility for my husband's safety, can I see your risk assessment document"
I know how hard it is and how exhausting when you are in the middle of a grief process but you can do it.
I personally didn't quote my own safety as by that time I decided they didn't give a "rat's axxx " about me but actually the pyschiatric team did quote the risk to me.
Keep going he can have a better life with treatment and the right placement and so can you.

 

[canary]

I personally didn't quote my own safety as by that time I decided they didn't give a "rat's axxx " about me

That is frequently true @Pollywobble , so phrase it as "he is at risk of causing serious harm to me" - this reflects the section in the mental health act where someones wishes can be overruled if they are at risk of harm, or causing harm to someone else. Then back it up by telling them that he has threatened to kill you and has already punched you.

 

[Veritas]

Well my resolve is definitely set now. I've spent the night in a chair by his bedside. I couldn't walk away as he had been waiting all day without food and drink and the only comfort he got was me holding his hand. He's been hallucinating all night and having episodes of psychotic delusions, as well as delirium, poor man.

Suddenly he shot out of bed dragging the drip machine over, shouting help and trying to reach the window. He actually punched me in the face! Although it didn't hurt, I will be fighting the system to find him somewhere rather than him going home.

Thank you for all your support overnight. Its been a long one!

I wasn’t online yesterday and missed the exchanges in real time, but I am horrified by the callous staff you seem to be dealing with. This is totally unacceptable and must not continue. Of course he can’t go home - that should be abundantly clear to them by now.

Dig those heels in. If they can’t provide the staff to look after him properly, there is no reason why you should plug the gap. The psychiatrists need to get their act together in a major way and relieve you of this terrible burden.

 

[Blissy]

I have been reading these post with increasing incredulity at what has been happening to you Pollywobble. I really didn't think that something like this could be happening in what is supposed to be a caring profession. Like the other posts I believe you need to keep refusing to have him home. I can understand why, for his sake, you feel you need to be by his side but the way you are being treated is totally unacceptable. I do so hope that before long someone steps in to help you. My thoughts and best wishes are with you.

 

[Firecatcher]

Well my resolve is definitely set now. I've spent the night in a chair by his bedside. I couldn't walk away as he had been waiting all day without food and drink and the only comfort he got was me holding his hand. He's been hallucinating all night and having episodes of psychotic delusions, as well as delirium, poor man.

Suddenly he shot out of bed dragging the drip machine over, shouting help and trying to reach the window. He actually punched me in the face! Although it didn't hurt, I will be fighting the system to find him somewhere rather than him going home.

Thank you for all your support overnight. Its been a long one!

Please make sure the ward staff have submitted an incident form about what happened. You will know if they have as they would have wanted your full name and date of birth to record on the form. It’s important that all incidents of aggression are documented because if events aren’t recorded they simply didn’t happen. In instances that end up in the coroners court incompetent nurses are made to look more stupid than they actually are because of inadequate documentation. Your husband could potentially be discharged to somewhere that are unable to manage his needs because aggressive incidents are whitewashed. This happened with my Mum and it caused problems that could have been avoided if the staff had been more honest and transparent.

 

[Violet Jane]

Oh my goodness! Was the punch witnessed?

Please refuse to have your husband home. If you’re not safe in the hospital then how can you be safe at home?

 

[Pollywobble]

Thank you all so much for your comments and 'staying with me' for this awful situation. I went quiet as I 'crashed' with stress.

Things have really improved thanks to the Alzheimer’s Organisation who happened to ring when I got home eventually. I told them about what had happened and THEY got in touch with the hospital on my behalf. What a difference! Today he is his own room which has had such a calming effect on him. He has an ensuite so he is now using the toilet independently again AND walking there as physiotherapy has been. The bars have been lowered so he can get out of bed and they have provided a really comfortable chair for him to sit in!! (He has been in a bed for over a week. ) The mental health team are now involved too. The safeguarding team have been alerted and he will go onto an assessment ward to sort something suitable for him.on discharge.

What an amazing outcome at last, thanks to the Alzheimers Organisation!

Complaints to PALS will be submitted when I'm feeling better.

 

[sdmhred]

Fabulous 🥰🥰🥰 I’m so glad they were able to advocate for you! How awful tho that these things weren’t put in place without that and suddenly they could…..u complain away when u have the energies ….

 

[Veritas]

Thank you all so much for your comments and 'staying with me' for this awful situation. I went quiet as I 'crashed' with stress.

Things have really improved thanks to the Alzheimer’s Organisation who happened to ring when I got home eventually. I told them about what had happened and THEY got in touch with the hospital on my behalf. What a difference! Today he is his own room which has had such a calming effect on him. He has an ensuite so he is now using the toilet independently again AND walking there as physiotherapy has been. The bars have been lowered so he can get out of bed and they have provided a really comfortable chair for him to sit in!! (He has been in a bed for over a week. ) The mental health team are now involved too. The safeguarding team have been alerted and he will go onto an assessment ward to sort something suitable for him.on discharge.

What an amazing outcome at last, thanks to the Alzheimers Organisation!

Complaints to PALS will be submitted when I'm feeling better.

Thank goodness someone has listened and made things happen. Shameful that their intervention was necessary, but it’s excellent news that your husband is doing better now that his environment is more appropriate to his needs.

Give yourself some time out - you need it - and then let rip with your feedback.

 

[Chizz]

Wishing you get an outcome suitable for both you and your OH @Pollywobble sooner than later.
Best wishes. Get rest whilst you can.

 

[Izzy]

That’s such good news @Pollywobble.

I hope you’re getting some much needed rest tonight.

 

[maisiecat]

That's great @Pollywobble and you must be feeling much safer with some improvment. When you feel strong enough try to use PALS to raise some of these issues. I always feel we must try and find the energy to do that because of those that follow us especially the PWD who have no relatives to advocate for them.
Take some rest now