Hi everyone,
Thanks so much for your support and advice, I'm in much agreement with what you are all saying and pretty much gave my OH this same ultimatum last night.
This lead to my OH, his other sister who has joint POA and myself having separate discussions with the social worker about our views. So now FIL will be going into to respite the end of the week with a view to permanent care with permission from both POAs.
There's a horrible mixture of feelings of guilt and relief at the moment. I know the next few weeks aren't going to be easy in the slightest but I do hope once my OH sees what it's like not having to worry 24/7 about his dad, he will realise its the right decision.
As I told him today you aren't a bad person you are just clinging on to the memory of your fit and healthy dad. He unfortunately is at the stage where his needs outweigh our help and there's no other option at the moment. We need to start focusing on our children now.
So now just need to speak to thecare home etc about arranging covid test, what he needs to take in with him and how to actually approach the conversation with him about going in.
Why is dementia so cruel and difficult ?
Thanks so much for your support and advice, I'm in much agreement with what you are all saying and pretty much gave my OH this same ultimatum last night.
This lead to my OH, his other sister who has joint POA and myself having separate discussions with the social worker about our views. So now FIL will be going into to respite the end of the week with a view to permanent care with permission from both POAs.
There's a horrible mixture of feelings of guilt and relief at the moment. I know the next few weeks aren't going to be easy in the slightest but I do hope once my OH sees what it's like not having to worry 24/7 about his dad, he will realise its the right decision.
As I told him today you aren't a bad person you are just clinging on to the memory of your fit and healthy dad. He unfortunately is at the stage where his needs outweigh our help and there's no other option at the moment. We need to start focusing on our children now.
So now just need to speak to thecare home etc about arranging covid test, what he needs to take in with him and how to actually approach the conversation with him about going in.
Why is dementia so cruel and difficult ?