You're most definitely not a bad person. As a DIL you have gone more than the extra mile. His family should be doing more to support you, if they're so adamant that a care home will kill him. I appreciate that it is a bust time for your OH but he should also be supporting you and your family while standing up to his own family and saying Enough! If they don't like what is being proposed then take on the role of full time unpaid carer themselves. Then see how they fit un a walk with friends! Good luck, and I hope your pregnancy goes well.Well as of yesterday I have finally gave up. The last few days it was very obvious FIL was "grumpier" and refusing to change his dirty clothes, refusing to wash his hands, pooing more etc. But yesterday he was more unsteady on his feet that usual. Me and my partner tried to explain hes going to have to use his walking aids about as he's going to fall and it resulted in him shouting at me and my partner and my little girl getting upset hearing it all and shouting "No granda!". She's 2 she shouldn't be near any of this
This also meant because my OH is at his busiest time of year work wise, that myself and my daughter were stuck inside on a lovely day. Called OHs sister for help, but while sympathic she was "too busy going out a walk with friends".
The final straw was when he was going on about not being allowed to drive anymore and I explained how he nearly reversed into my car the last time he drove and what if it had been his granddaughter there on the drive. His reply was a shrug of the shoulders and "oh well".
I understand its the dementia talking but enough is enough. I called emergency social worker and they have arranged my social worker to call back tomorrow. I have told family and social work I'm not doing it anymore. No washing, cleaning, sitting with him, even sitting in the same room. He has 4 children that dictate their boundaries yet im not allowed mine.
I feel so angry and upset about it all, I really pray social work do something tomorrow because I honestly think I will have to leave my home if not.....
Please someone tell me im not a bad person cause that's all I feel just now ?
Well as of yesterday I have finally gave up. The last few days it was very obvious FIL was "grumpier" and refusing to change his dirty clothes, refusing to wash his hands, pooing more etc. But yesterday he was more unsteady on his feet that usual. Me and my partner tried to explain hes going to have to use his walking aids about as he's going to fall and it resulted in him shouting at me and my partner and my little girl getting upset hearing it all and shouting "No granda!". She's 2 she shouldn't be near any of this
This also meant because my OH is at his busiest time of year work wise, that myself and my daughter were stuck inside on a lovely day. Called OHs sister for help, but while sympathic she was "too busy going out a walk with friends".
The final straw was when he was going on about not being allowed to drive anymore and I explained how he nearly reversed into my car the last time he drove and what if it had been his granddaughter there on the drive. His reply was a shrug of the shoulders and "oh well".
I understand its the dementia talking but enough is enough. I called emergency social worker and they have arranged my social worker to call back tomorrow. I have told family and social work I'm not doing it anymore. No washing, cleaning, sitting with him, even sitting in the same room. He has 4 children that dictate their boundaries yet im not allowed mine.
I feel so angry and upset about it all, I really pray social work do something tomorrow because I honestly think I will have to leave my home if not.....
Please someone tell me im not a bad person cause that's all I feel just now ?