This is my first post, so I have started with a run-down of what has happened so far, which is about 95% of the post - sorry.
However I believe that more interaction with others could help my wife enormously, she is very isolated as things are.
My wife was diagnosed with Alzheimer's at the age of 67 back in May 2021, looking back in time, she was not coping at work from about 2014. We made the appointment with the Memory Clinic because it was obvious that she was getting lost in situations and making obscure conversations, she also had problems with spatial awareness, crossing roads when it wasn't safe etc.
The diagnosis was done by a consultant with no bedside manner whatsoever, she was diagnosed and packed off with nothing much more than a number to call. The nurse on the end of that line was helpful at the start, but she was replaced by a guy who likes the sound of his own voice, you have to shout at him to get a word in sideways. In all cases these nurses have been concerned with medication, which have all had bad side effects so far, rather than her mental state.
As to my wife's mental state, she initially rejected the diagnosis, having not driven for 6 months, she rejected my proposal that we should have her driving ability assessed before she could drive again, with the spatial awareness problems I couldn't help but think she could be a danger to herself and others, she has now accepted that she shouldn't drive.
As a bit of background, we have not had a particularly good relationship for the last 20 years, my wife has very few friends as she has not wanted to join in with social activities. I have had holidays by myself or with friends since 2005. With this background it makes it difficult trying to set up trips or days out and there are virtually no joint activities with friends. We did have a week away last September, which was a 50-50 mix of good and bad. What few friends she has remaining are still working and give very little support.
A long term problem has been that she has junk and abandoned projects all over the place, and no I'm not a tidiness freak, she has boxes of assorted stuff everywhere and can never find anything. We have a safe place for valuables which she has cleared out, our son found the cat chasing a diamond ring round the dining room the other day. She sits in the living room doing absolutely nothing most of the time, often sleeping. She cannot fathom how to turn the TV on, she's convinced Alexa will do it - she won't. She will get up and shuffle things around occasionally and loves meddling with anything, often with things that are nothing to do with her, leading to confusion amongst the normal functioners around here. She sometimes takes on a task or tries to help with something which always results in a job half done because she has wandered off and found something else to do - or not. She frequently has spells when she is sure that someone is going to move in with us or come and take our house away from us and throw us out on the streets, or she doesn't know where she goes to sleep, it can take an hour or more to calm her down from this. She also seems to see obscure things in her peripheral vision.
She has other health issues, as do I, she needs to take exercise and eat well, both of which she is very reluctant to do, she will fry anything. She does not keep her personal hygiene regime up and gets stroppy when I tell her that she should have a shower before a hospital appointment.
She has also developed a habit of falling over, she fell just last week, a lady standing nearby saw her fall and said she didn't trip or anything, she just fell over. This caused a second trip to A&E in the last four months, I'll be having Social Services knocking on the door.
That's the story in brief (?) so far, I'm not really looking for support for me, there just seems to be a lack of support for my wife, Covid has put most groups on to Zoom, which she wouldn't cope with. I have seen about groups where she could go but I would also have to attend, that would probably leave me needing help.
Does anyone out there have any suggestions please?
However I believe that more interaction with others could help my wife enormously, she is very isolated as things are.
My wife was diagnosed with Alzheimer's at the age of 67 back in May 2021, looking back in time, she was not coping at work from about 2014. We made the appointment with the Memory Clinic because it was obvious that she was getting lost in situations and making obscure conversations, she also had problems with spatial awareness, crossing roads when it wasn't safe etc.
The diagnosis was done by a consultant with no bedside manner whatsoever, she was diagnosed and packed off with nothing much more than a number to call. The nurse on the end of that line was helpful at the start, but she was replaced by a guy who likes the sound of his own voice, you have to shout at him to get a word in sideways. In all cases these nurses have been concerned with medication, which have all had bad side effects so far, rather than her mental state.
As to my wife's mental state, she initially rejected the diagnosis, having not driven for 6 months, she rejected my proposal that we should have her driving ability assessed before she could drive again, with the spatial awareness problems I couldn't help but think she could be a danger to herself and others, she has now accepted that she shouldn't drive.
As a bit of background, we have not had a particularly good relationship for the last 20 years, my wife has very few friends as she has not wanted to join in with social activities. I have had holidays by myself or with friends since 2005. With this background it makes it difficult trying to set up trips or days out and there are virtually no joint activities with friends. We did have a week away last September, which was a 50-50 mix of good and bad. What few friends she has remaining are still working and give very little support.
A long term problem has been that she has junk and abandoned projects all over the place, and no I'm not a tidiness freak, she has boxes of assorted stuff everywhere and can never find anything. We have a safe place for valuables which she has cleared out, our son found the cat chasing a diamond ring round the dining room the other day. She sits in the living room doing absolutely nothing most of the time, often sleeping. She cannot fathom how to turn the TV on, she's convinced Alexa will do it - she won't. She will get up and shuffle things around occasionally and loves meddling with anything, often with things that are nothing to do with her, leading to confusion amongst the normal functioners around here. She sometimes takes on a task or tries to help with something which always results in a job half done because she has wandered off and found something else to do - or not. She frequently has spells when she is sure that someone is going to move in with us or come and take our house away from us and throw us out on the streets, or she doesn't know where she goes to sleep, it can take an hour or more to calm her down from this. She also seems to see obscure things in her peripheral vision.
She has other health issues, as do I, she needs to take exercise and eat well, both of which she is very reluctant to do, she will fry anything. She does not keep her personal hygiene regime up and gets stroppy when I tell her that she should have a shower before a hospital appointment.
She has also developed a habit of falling over, she fell just last week, a lady standing nearby saw her fall and said she didn't trip or anything, she just fell over. This caused a second trip to A&E in the last four months, I'll be having Social Services knocking on the door.
That's the story in brief (?) so far, I'm not really looking for support for me, there just seems to be a lack of support for my wife, Covid has put most groups on to Zoom, which she wouldn't cope with. I have seen about groups where she could go but I would also have to attend, that would probably leave me needing help.
Does anyone out there have any suggestions please?
