Knew it was coming but! Wetting

[jay6]

So I read posts about bed wetting so knew it was coming but not as prepared as should have been.
There has been a funny smell in husbands room for a while but I couldn't pin point what it was as the bed wasn't wet and he washed.
He did have one day in which he wet the bed but said he had a dream about peeing so I changed bed and put it down to that. Nothing happened for the next few days.
We then went away and he wet the bed EVERY day. Luckily he was in a child's room which had waterproof cover and 2 beds. So I was able to wash the sheet and use the one from spare bed. He always has pee bottle beside so shouldn't of been a problem.
I bought padded pants which made no difference.
We are now home and I went into his room, bent down and smelt the carpet and sure enough it smelt of pea so it's possibly been going on a while. I asked him calmly if he'd been having any accidents but just got a lot of nasty abuse.
My grand daughter had an accident in this room when she was about 3 (5 years ago) The mattress wasn't wet. I washed all the bed linen and that was the end of that so I thought! But now it seems according to my OH. The bed has stuck since my daughters accident and has nothing to do with him. He's been sleeping in this room for about 3 years now and never mentioned it before but has always been someone who never takes blame. It's always someone else's fault.
Contacted doctors and was just offered antibiotics which I refused and insisted on seeing someone so have an appointment tomorrow to rule out any infections and to take a water sample (Obviously it's the dementia)
Oh well looks like the next stage to contend with. Is this middle stage or later stage??

 

[canary]

Hi @jay6
Im sorry you have reached this stage. Get yourself organised with waterproof mattress cover and 2 or 3 kylie sheets. you can also get similar pads designed for chairs and sofas. Spray cleaners/deodorisers intended for pet accidents are good for cleaning and get rid of the smell. Add laundry sanitiser when washing bedding, clothes etc to get rid of that smell. If you can afford a carpet cleaner I would recommend it - Ive seen adverts for a nifty hand held one designed for cleaning up after pet accidents that looks good.

Do get yourself referred to the continence clinic - padded pants are OK for dribbles, but no good for a bladder full. Pull-ups work well, but the difficulty, Im sorry to say, will be getting him to accept them,,,,

 

[jay6]

Hi @jay6
Im sorry you have reached this stage. Get yourself organised with waterproof mattress cover and 2 or 3 kylie sheets. you can also get similar pads designed for chairs and sofas. Spray cleaners/deodorisers intended for pet accidents are good for cleaning and get rid of the smell. Add laundry sanitiser when washing bedding, clothes etc to get rid of that smell. If you can afford a carpet cleaner I would recommend it - Ive seen adverts for a nifty hand held one designed for cleaning up after pet accidents that looks good.

Do get yourself referred to the continence clinic - padded pants are OK for dribbles, but no good for a bladder full. Pull-ups work well, but the difficulty, Im sorry to say, will be getting him to accept them,,,,

I've just bought a waterproof protector and ordered the kylie sheets. Never thought of laundry sanitiser but now on my list for tomorrow, along with pet sprays/cleaners. Just looking into a carpet cleaner.
Hoping the doctor will put him onto the incontinence clinic when we go tomorrow, I did buy padded pull ups but no good as he just saw them as not having to actually get up and go.
Luckily he does know he has a problem but choices to make excuses.
Thanks for the advice Canary

 

[jay6]

Was just about to order Kylie sheets from a company as not on Amazon but was wondering if worth waiting to see what happens tomorrow or what the incontinence clinic offer? Anyone got an advice?

 

[nitram]

Don't forget to tick 'VAT exempt' if available.

 

[canary]

Continence clinics do not usually offer kylie sheets. I bought mine from a nursing supply shop on the local industrial estate an possibly paid over the odds for them, but they are worth their weight in gold.

You might be OK for a little while, but you know its coming and I think its best to be prepared.

 

[Izzy]

I would agree re kylie sheets. My husband got a supply of continence products such as pull ups etc - I had an ongoing battle to get the correct products for him but we got there. I bought our Kylie sheets from an online supplier.

The continence clinic also arranged a prescription for oxybutin - for an over active bladder - but to be honest it made no difference.

 

[jay6]

Don't forget to tick 'VAT exempt' if available.

Didn't know I could do that thanks for pointing it out

 

[jay6]

@canary and @Izzy Thanks for info. I'll go ahead with my order then

 

[jay6]

We went to GP he suggested the best thing for OH was a catheter as he is struggling to get up and use the pee bottles next to his bed without wetting the bed or floor. Needless to say he has flatly refused, so GP told him to think about it and he will call next week. In meantime OH been referred to incontinence clinic. Anyone know roughly how long that takes?
The kylie sheet should arrive tomorrow but not sure what to do about the carpet. Did think of putting a small rug down but worried he may trip on it. Anyone had trouble with carpets?
He's also been put on tablets (can't remember name at present) but GP wasn't that hopeful they would stop it.
I tried getting up with him every time he needed a pee in night for a week while away. It was EVERY hour give or take 10 minutes so I couldn't keep it up once we got home.
Anyone have experience with catheters? do they leak? infections? better?

 

[canary]

Anyone have experience with catheters? do they leak? infections? better?

Yes, OH has a catheter. In his case he has no choice as he has a paralysed bladder and is unable to pass anything until the bladder is full and he gets "overflow", so we have had to learn to live with a catheter

Yes, it can spring leaks and/or come adrift, which is why he always has a kylie sheet on his bed. You have to hook it up to a night bag at night, which then has to be emptied in the morning. There is also a day (or leg) bag which stays on all the time, but has to be replaced once a week. I used to do this, but now his carers do it. Its not difficult, although it can be a bit messy if they dont keep still (best to do it in the bathroom). It does mean that he sleeps better now, so that is a big plus.

Infections - this is the big minus. OH got many, many infections and is now on prophylactic (permanent low dose) antibiotics which have kept it mostly under control. Mind you, I think incontinence also causes infections, so there is an element of swings and roundabouts. The othe problem is that catheters can get blocked and if this happens it is an emergency and you have to call out the District Nurses who will come out (they have to come within 2 hours) to sort it out. I have had to make several call outs at 3.00am and then be awake to let them in, then settle OH down again, so not much sleep. But at least its not every night.

As for the carpet by the bed - try cleaning it with spray cleaner intended to clean up after pet accidents (available from pet shops), use a puppy training pad there, or invest in a hand held carpet cleaner

 

[canary]

I posted all of the above and then suddenly thought - what sort of catheter was your GP talking about?

OH has the usual urethral catheter, which is where there is a catheter tube permanently in his penis, but when the problem is more one of incontinence then sometimes a sheath catheter is used - especially if it is only needed at night.
This is where there is a sheath that goes over the penis (and sticks around the top) which leads to a tube that goes to a night bag. In the morning you remove the whole thing. I dont have any experience of these, but I would imagine that they are less prone to infections and wont get blocked in the same way that OHs does

 

[jay6]

@canary Thanks for info, The suggestion was permanent one which he had for the rest of his life. He had a stroke 10 years ago and was left with useless left arm and bad mobility so the GP thought it would be best as he struggles to get out of bed in time and needs loo quite a bit in day. He needs the loo before bladder is ever full. GP thought it would be best as he is up every hour (no exaggeration, within 10 minutes give or take)
He doesn't have a carer so I suppose that will be down to me if he goes ahead.
You say they get blocked, how?
As for cleaner, yes I'm looking into getting one as think this may be a regular thing in future. Luckily we only have carpet in bedrooms.
Unfortunately he is still saying won't have one so have to wait and see if GP or I can get him to understand it's better than wetting.
I think it is due to infections as he knew someone who had this years ago (women died now) and she was always getting infections. Don't know how different the mens are as apposed to the ones women have use.

 

[nitram]

You say they get blocked, how?

In my wife's case it was crystalline deposits, sometimes all that was required was a catheter change, others a bladder flush.
The severity fluctuated, sometimes the catheter only lasted a day.

 

[canary]

You say they get blocked, how?

He gets "sediment" in the urine from the bladder lining which blocks the tube.
It is easily sorted out by the DNs who come and change the catheter (he has only once needed a bladder wash out), but they have to come and do it within 2 hrs, so you cant wait till morning. The DNs would change the catheter every 12 weeks anyway, but OH never goes that long without it blocking, so now they come every 6 weeks routinely, and as an emergency if it gets blocked.

OH used to be up and down to the loo all night too, because his bladder was full, but he could not empty it. Just before he got the catheter he could only pass 10cc of urine voluntarily, but there would be frequent "overflow" and UTIs because of the urine just sitting there in the bladder.
The catheter is not ideal, but it is better than those days

 

[jay6]

In my wife's case it was crystalline deposits, sometimes all that was required was a catheter change, others a bladder flush.
The severity fluctuated, sometimes the catheter only lasted a day.

Oh gosh something else to worry about but thanks for replying nitram

 

[jay6]

He gets "sediment" in the urine from the bladder lining which blocks the tube.
It is easily sorted out by the DNs who come and change the catheter (he has only once needed a bladder wash out), but they have to come and do it within 2 hrs, so you cant wait till morning. The DNs would change the catheter every 12 weeks anyway, but OH never goes that long without it blocking, so now they come every 6 weeks routinely, and as an emergency if it gets blocked.

OH used to be up and down to the loo all night too, because his bladder was full, but he could not empty it. Just before he got the catheter he could only pass 10cc of urine voluntarily, but there would be frequent "overflow" and UTIs because of the urine just sitting there in the bladder.
The catheter is not ideal, but it is better than those days

Mine passes about 200cc on average, gosh this is a lot to think about but probably the best solution if we can get him to agree. He sleeps a lot during the day because he isn't sleeping properly at night.
He's also very abusive when things don't go his way. So am hoping if he has a catheter and sleeps better the abuse may not be so bad. Well I can live in hope! Thanks again canary