I try to be positive. I take all of the criticism, shouting , abuse and vicious verbal attack about our son being a thief and stealing something everyday he knows exactly what things have been stolen and where from . That I talk about him behind his back , that I am trying along with our son to push him out and get rid of him .( I may add here that our son doesn't live with us and he rarely calls because of his dad, I do go to his as that is lovely for me to see him and just try to get back to some sort of normal for a while) That I am trying to control his life, he knows what I am doing. He has been threatening to leave me and go his own way for years and now he is leaving me and will find another woman who will be everything I am not ( where he will find such a wonderful person I'm not sure ,but strangely I am not bothered ). I went out last night with a girl friend for a drink which we have done maybe once a month for years, today he asked me who I had "pulled " , tempting as that might seem , it has never crossed my mind . Although I think I am reasonably attractive, oddly I have never been asked ,(maybe two older women in a very nice country hotel , sitting on a two seater settee in an out of the way corner deep in conversation doesn't give off the right vibes ! ) . My son and daughter both think I am loosing the plot as I am constantly stressed, trying to do what is right. Worryingly they may be right . So here's the question. No sympathy please just how you would deal with it. Is today the day I give up. Move into another bedroom Do my own thing and let him muddle on . The farm we live on is up for sale ( because he can no longer cope since our son moved out ) so when it is sold I can go and get my own place and a life . He wants to move to another county so he can get back to all his old friends, who he never sees. He is 70 this year but very physically fit if this is relevant I'm not sure.. One thing is for sure it cant carry on like this . No he wont have help, he wont talk to anyone , he wont join any group ( not sure he could anyway ) he goes no where sits staring into space most of the day. And no he doesn't have a problem , that in his words , couldn't be solved if he got away from his family ( he adores our daughter , who lives with her fiancée 20 miles away ).