We are on the slippery slope towards incontinence:
A few weeks ago my husband began to have difficulties locating the toilet/bathroom, sometimes he would be too desperate to get there in time, other times he would make it, but forget to remove his trousers, or if he managed all of that, he would flood the floor instead of aiming for the toilet bowl.
But all the time he knew he needed to 'go' - just couldn't put all the actions together. I therefore resisted incontinence pants, as I wanted to make it as easy as possible for him at all times.
Sadly, he has also started 'stool holding', probably because he can't work out what to do when he feels the need to open his bowels. We have tried a raised toilet seat with supports either side, but he cannot be persuaded to sit on it. All this means he suffers terrible abdominal spasms every single day, they scare him rigid, he shouts that he is dying, he cries, he can't be comforted, and the 'cleaning up sessions' don't make him feel any better, either (in fact, he has, on occasion, become very aggressive, probably due to frustration and embarrassment).
I have now resorted to using the incontinence pants day and night (surprisingly, he doesn't object). What worries me is that I am getting him used to just 'letting go', and taking away the slightest chance that he might, one day, successfully use the toilet.
Is there any possibility that this situation could, one day, improve again? Or do I have to accept that we are stuck with double incontinence .......
I know every person is different, I am just trying to find out what our chances for a turn for the better are.
A few weeks ago my husband began to have difficulties locating the toilet/bathroom, sometimes he would be too desperate to get there in time, other times he would make it, but forget to remove his trousers, or if he managed all of that, he would flood the floor instead of aiming for the toilet bowl.
But all the time he knew he needed to 'go' - just couldn't put all the actions together. I therefore resisted incontinence pants, as I wanted to make it as easy as possible for him at all times.
Sadly, he has also started 'stool holding', probably because he can't work out what to do when he feels the need to open his bowels. We have tried a raised toilet seat with supports either side, but he cannot be persuaded to sit on it. All this means he suffers terrible abdominal spasms every single day, they scare him rigid, he shouts that he is dying, he cries, he can't be comforted, and the 'cleaning up sessions' don't make him feel any better, either (in fact, he has, on occasion, become very aggressive, probably due to frustration and embarrassment).
I have now resorted to using the incontinence pants day and night (surprisingly, he doesn't object). What worries me is that I am getting him used to just 'letting go', and taking away the slightest chance that he might, one day, successfully use the toilet.
Is there any possibility that this situation could, one day, improve again? Or do I have to accept that we are stuck with double incontinence .......
I know every person is different, I am just trying to find out what our chances for a turn for the better are.