Well I'm back. I would like to thank everyone from thir support, both online and off.
It was a difficult time, not made easier by having to clear my mother's property of everything. I suppose I could have left it for a while, but there didn't seem much point and despite all the paperwork and arrangments I had to make, time weighed very heavily on my hands. The most difficult thing (well the thing that constantly produced tears) was deciding what to do with my mother's many books - these were so important to her when she was well, that making a decision about each and every one was very difficult. I ended up bring 3 large, heavy suitcases back.
I was extremely upset not to get there in order to see her again, but I'm not sure that she didn't plan it that way. I know that sounds strange, but her death was unexpectedly fast, and one of her carers said that just before she died, she had said to my mother "Jenny will be here tomorrow" and Mummy said "I don't want Jenny to have to deal with me like this", turned over, went to sleep and within 1/2 hour she was dead.
I don't know - we believe the things that makes it easier I suppose.
The funeral (humanist, very small, very appropriate) went OK. I spread my mother's ashes on the Sussex downs (with difficulty: there are far too many people on the coast in the summer, and this is something you want to do privately).
Jennifer
It was a difficult time, not made easier by having to clear my mother's property of everything. I suppose I could have left it for a while, but there didn't seem much point and despite all the paperwork and arrangments I had to make, time weighed very heavily on my hands. The most difficult thing (well the thing that constantly produced tears) was deciding what to do with my mother's many books - these were so important to her when she was well, that making a decision about each and every one was very difficult. I ended up bring 3 large, heavy suitcases back.
I was extremely upset not to get there in order to see her again, but I'm not sure that she didn't plan it that way. I know that sounds strange, but her death was unexpectedly fast, and one of her carers said that just before she died, she had said to my mother "Jenny will be here tomorrow" and Mummy said "I don't want Jenny to have to deal with me like this", turned over, went to sleep and within 1/2 hour she was dead.
I don't know - we believe the things that makes it easier I suppose.
The funeral (humanist, very small, very appropriate) went OK. I spread my mother's ashes on the Sussex downs (with difficulty: there are far too many people on the coast in the summer, and this is something you want to do privately).
Jennifer