I can't do this............

[jenniferpa]

Oh for crying out loud! One assumes they still catheterise people who are having surgery? I mean there are sterile ways to do this: I would think that what they should be doing is ensuring that their procedures are up to scratch not just saying "duh, we can't do this consistently without causing infection so we won't do it at all". Sorry Hazel: it just makes my blood boil on your (and John's) behalf.

 

[mel]

Dear Hazel

I've no real advice to give......I'm afraid when mum was in hospital I became very disillusioned with the way things worked.

I'm sure things would improve with John to some extent if they could only clear up this bl**dy UTI!! He must be feeling lousy but can't express himself in the way you or I can.......

Day by day Hazel........

Love and big hugs to you both
xx

(PS......I'd love to be a fly on the wall at your meeting on Monday!!!!!)

 

[Grannie G]

(PS......I'd love to be a fly on the wall at your meeting on Monday!!!!!)

Wouldn`t we all.

 

[Mameeskye]

(((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))) Hazel

I know that it has taken Mum months in the past to recover from a UTI and I have tried to get a urine sample from a 3 week old. it's not easy and I know the staff had similar problems with Mum. It really is pot luck (oops, sorry for the bad pun!!) Another suugestion might be to try a condom catheter, which is not inserted but rather fits over.

Hopefully though they will get a culture and get a feel for what is happening. I agree though that there is no way you will be able to cope at home easily with this. You really need a lot of care in place if you are to bring J home. The exhaustion is all too familiar too. It is not just hospital visiting etc. it is your body saying enough is enough after the sustained adrenalin that has probably been pushing you through the last weeks and months. Also it will be combined with grief which is the most tiring emotion I have ever known.

Hope today is better.

Love

Mameeskye

 

[Cliff]

Dear Hazel,

Do hope todays visit finds an improvement for John.

Thinking of you, love to you both

 

[BeckyJan]

Hello, Skye - just catching up on a few posts. Really sorry to hear about the situation with John. Nothing more to add but just thinking about you.

Try to take care Best wishes Jan

 

[Margaret W]

Well, I haven't read all 17 pages, but it's quite clear that the people on this thread are going through a lot worse than I am, and I admire you all. Silly question, but is the government aware of the free care you are giving that is saving them a hell of a lot of money - or are you all getting good financial support to help you? Don't answer that!

I am in no position to advise any of you, I'd just say, you can't do any more that your best.

I'm sure you all know that.

Love, love, love to you all.

Margaret

 

[DeborahBlythe]

Wouldn`t we all.

If there's a bunch of cluster flies in the training room Hazel, it'll be us TP-ers morphed into insect form and rooting for you on Monday. We'll all be with you in spirit, anyway. Very sorry to hear about all the annoying things that are happening and hoping you have a stress-free day today. Love Deborah xx

 

[Canadian Joanne]

Dear Hazel,
Thinking of you & wishing you the best.
Love

 

[connie]

Hazel dear, how was John today? Is it too soon to hope for an improvement?

Did your training session at the hospital go well? Sorry, so many questions.
Would love an update from you when you feel able.

Love,

 

[Margarita]

but I'm constantly drained. I think that's why I'm so afraid of not being able to cope.

Who can blame you , after catching up with this thread in how you and John our getting on , you must be so emotional drain , with the ups down of john improvement then he go down again . but you do cope , as best as you can that all we can do , be honest with ourselves

hope the OT come around to your house before John gets home , because it sounds like you may need 24/7 care help at home when John gets home , but who know his mobility may improves .

when John or if john go in to respite , hope you make sure that a full assessment is done before he come home to you . so you get the full support you need .

sending you a big energy of positive feeling from a big [[[hug]]]

 

[Skye]

Further update, thanks for the concern everyone.

John is still in hospital. I had an interview with his hospital consultant on Friday, who said he would be discharged to me at the beginning of this week. Yes, he was fully mobile. Yes, he could manage stairs. His infection had cleared up. No explanation for the temperature spikes.

Mobile? Hmm. He can't even get out of his chair without assistance, and has been getting out of bed at night and falling. He hasn't even been near any stairs.

Had a night of panic on Friday. Tomorrow is my day at the nursing college, and I've cancelled the cover I'd arranged. My SS is off on Tuesday and Wednesday, so I won't be able to contact him. Horrible visions of John being dumped on me and no help available.

Spoke to Sister yesterday -- don't panic! These consultants have unrealistic goals for discharging patients. John was certainly not ready for discharge, and she would say so at the weekly inter-disciplinary meeting on Tuesday. Don't panic!!!!

I'm not sure if I mentioned it, but that sister is on the course I'm talking to tomorrow. She'll get loads of brownie points.

So the short answer is, I still don't know if I'll be able to have John home. At least they're still trying.

Wish me luck for tomorrow, and if you're one of Deborah's swarm of flies, buzz loudly if words fail me.

Love,

 

[BeckyJan]

sending you a big energy of positive feeling from a big [[[hug]]]
__________________

Me too - just gunning for you and hope things work out reasonably well.
Hope the Sister stays on your side.
Good luck for tomorrow.

Take care Jan

 

[connie]

Hazel, hope everything works out for you - on all fronts.

Why do they do it:

Yes, he was fully mobile. Yes, he could manage stairs. His infection had cleared up. No explanation for the temperature spikes.

It is as if they live in a different world to us.

Stay strong, hang on in there. John is your main concern, everything else comes a poor second.

Love, as always,

 

[blue sea]

Hazel, how frightening that must have been for you to think that they might discharge John when he was clearly not in a suitable state for you to manage. If this ever happens again remember that they cannot discharge him home to you without your full agreement. On the brighter side, it's great to hear the infection has cleared up as that seemed to be causing so many of the problems. It's still a day by day situation, I know, and that is very hard for you. It's good to know you have some caring and aware staff dealing with John's situation. The consultant may know a lot about medicine, but obviously very little about the illness of dementia.
Blue sea

 

[Kate P]

Hazel,

Hope everythings gone well for you both today.

(((HUGS)))

 

[Margarita]

I'd arranged. My SS is off on Tuesday and Wednesday, so I won't be able to contact him

God don't they just love to panic people , Just tell them plan and simple that you want john home , but not till you have all the serves in place at home , don't forget make appointment with OT to come around the house

 

[Skye]

Well, today was brilliant -- in parts.

I was at the college from 9 till 4, and thoroughly enjoyed it. The nurses were all very interested, and keen to learn, and to be honest most of them knew exactly what should be done.

'My' sister was brilliant, she has ablolutely all the right ideas. But she said she often goes home in despair because she knows she hasn't done all she should for her patients.

The problem is, as we know, lack of money and shortage of staff. I felt so sorry for the nurses, they are all so committed. I suppose they wouldn't have been on the course otherwise.

One point that struck me though -- they were all from medical or geriatric wards. There were no representatives from surgical or A&E, and I think they need training more than the geriatric nurses.

Maybe next time!

Then I went to hospital to visit John. He's looking better physically, and was sitting up in a chair, but mentally he's very confused still, and I didn't see much sigh of mobility.

Tomorrow is the multi-discipline assessment, so I'm waiting for the next bombshell.

Love,

 

[connie]

Glad that you had a good day Sylvia.

Then I went to hospital to visit John. He's looking better physically, and was sitting up in a chair, but mentally he's very confused still, and I didn't see much sigh of mobility

Hope things are better for John tomorrow. I know he is your priority.

Love,

 

[Margarita]

Hope things are better for John tomorrow. I know he is your priority

I 2nd that xx