My wife and I have been married for almost 45 years but her dementia has changed her so much especially over the last year. Her memory is virtually non existent; just seconds sometimes. She knows who I am but can be so very nasty towards me even though I care for her and run the house and chores etc. It is so upsetting and lately I cry at the slightest thing. Although a qualified carer comes in for 45 minutes a day. I am on ant depressants myself due to my wife's condition. Is her behavior normal for her condition? It seems, from what I have read, that it is common behavior. Not sure how much longer I can continue but a home is the last place I would want her to go into. Any help or advice would be grateful. I am a Buddhist and my chanting helps me but...
Well, at least you've found TP Tony - welcome!
You can already see that others have a similar life. All I would say is that things do change, and not always for the worse. My wife Sue went through a mercifully brief period when she had many of the symptoms of advanced dementia and I could not imagine where either of us would be now if that had continued. She's now calm and relatively happy most of the time.
But, when there are any changes that make life more difficult - as there are - I find that it takes a while to adjust to them. And if even small changes come thick and fast, it's not long before I feel I might sink. But then I adjust, find ways to cope and get back on an even keel - until the next time.
I hope that you will find this but, if you do have to consider a care home placement you'll find members who have discovered that their worst fears were unfounded and life is more manageable for them and their loved one.
I agree that you need to try to get more time to yourself, hard though that is to arrange.
Do you feel that the anti-depressants are helping? If not, they may actually be contributing to your problems.
Keep posting and reading. It really does help.