Feeling guilty

[Bren43]

I am feeling guilty today, I have tested positive for covid so feeling pretty awful. My OH has been in quite a strange mood,questioning everything I say. He then insisted there was a bird in the room and I should go to it,I lost my temper and shouted at him and now feel bad! I know the saying goes “you’re only human “ but doesn’t help

 

[donbrazzt]

I know exactly how you feel.I try really hard to keep things on an even keel,but sometimes it is just overwhelming.Just try to focus on all the other times when you could have lost it but didn’t.

 

[Grannie G]

Nothing helps @Bren43.

You have tested positive for covid and are still having to be a full time carer for your OH with dementia.

I don`t know how you are managing it.

I doubt you would even be able to get emergency respite if your OH has been in contact with covid and sincerely hope he doesn`t get it too.

Have you any family who could give you a break? Some who have had covid?

What on earth are carers expected to do in situations like this?

 

[Bren43]

Thanks for that. We do punish ourselves don’t we, it’s not easy keeping a lid on at times when you don’t feel good. Just have to keep going,though!

 

[Bren43]

Nothing helps @Bren43.

You have tested positive for covid and are still having to be a full time carer for your OH with dementia.

I don`t know how you are managing it.

I doubt you would even be able to get emergency respite if your OH has been in contact with covid and sincerely hope he doesn`t get it too.

Have you any family who could give you a break? Some who have had covid?

What on earth are carers expected to do in situations like this?

 

[Bren43]

Grannie G, my OH now has a paid carer twice daily as his mobility is very limited and she is great at getting him dressed and then into bed at night so I am not completely alone. But the days can be difficult when I’m under the weather myself.

 

[Grannie G]

Welcome @donbrazzt I hope you find Dementia Talking Point helpful and supportive.

We are none of us robots and having a partner with dementia is as upsetting for us as anything can be.

A lot is expected of carers, too much whith the lack of support available these days.

This might be a helpful guide

Compassionate Communication with the Memory Impaired

The following piece was posted a while ago on DSF and made a big impression on me. It is something I have referred to time after time and tried hard to follow. We have many new members who may not have seen it before. Yesterday I posted it on another Thread but thought it might be helpful if...

forum.alzheimers.org.uk

It`s. a tall order but when seen as a guide, it`s been found to be helpful

 

[Ioan]

I am feeling guilty today, I have tested positive for covid so feeling pretty awful. My OH has been in quite a strange mood,questioning everything I say. He then insisted there was a bird in the room and I should go to it,I lost my temper and shouted at him and now feel bad! I know the saying goes “you’re only human “ but doesn’t help

Every career loses their temper at one time or another. Knowing this might not help with you feeling bad but at least you know your are normal.

 

[Eddcorner]

I am feeling guilty today, I have tested positive for covid so feeling pretty awful. My OH has been in quite a strange mood,questioning everything I say. He then insisted there was a bird in the room and I should go to it,I lost my temper and shouted at him and now feel bad! I know the saying goes “you’re only human “ but doesn’t help

Please do not feel guilty @Bren43 !

It's a natural response in the most challenging of circumstances, you had to vent at that moment and testing positive for Covid probably didn't help any. Try not to dwell although that's I know easier said than done! We're our own worst critics and at the beginning of my mum's and my own journey we had some right clangers (she was always a firecracker). Things are a lot more settled now but we still have our moments