They won't do that it would mean they would have to spend time with her
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When my mum said horrible things, I used to say to myself "oh the dementia is being unpleasant again" I knew my "real" mum would never in a million years have said or done anything to hurt me.
I have a short fuse at the best of times and yes I sometimes did "snap" back and then ask my mum if she would like a nice cup of tea and a sandwich and she was all smiles and I used to think "mums back".
Yes & yes to everything everyone else has said. I must learn it's the dementia not mum doing it deliberately. Where's my patience gone?!
I have been thinking about this it's not my nan I'm trying to shock it's letting the illness know I will stand for it and in my own way I'm trying to pull my nan back
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