Dementia and alchohol

[JillyFlower]

Hello, I have mentioned this subject before, but there don't seem to be many people out there with the same problem.
My husband has Alzheimer's and vascular dementia. However, my main problem is with his drinking. He cannot manage to do very much on line these days, but can still manage to order boxes of wine! He is in complete denial about the situation, but cannot function without his "red med" as he calls it. He has reduced it to a bottle a day, but is staggering around and falling over by evening time. This is not helped by his extremely low weight and lack of appetite.
I cannot get help from AA (as he is in denial) His GP is not interested (I am considering moving to another surgery)
There does not appear to be any help at all, suggestions to "water it down" are impossible to employ, he would be aware, and also I cannot spend all day opening bottles to water them down.
It may be possible to cancel the order, but he would just order more, and be very angry and agitated. (we are talking addiction here) it was suggested by a friend that I might lock him in at night, (that is when he falls, going to get more bottles and smoking) but I only tried it once! Not a good experience, and I felt very uncomfortable doing so anyway! I often have to call the ambulance for falls (they have referred him to a "falls unit" but I have not heard anything from them!
I could go on but you probably get the picture - total despair, frustration, exhaustion, stressed out etc.
Sorry for the moan, thank you for listening xxx

 

[Dunroamin]

MY first husband was alcoholic and you cannot change their behaviour. They are the ones to have to WANT to change. And yes you can get help from AA for yourself - as either his carer or a family member.

Your GP will have had possibly years of experiencing alcohol problems in patients and knows there is no point pursuing change when denial is present. Perhaps the only light at the end of the tunnel would be if a DOLS was invoked then a programme of detox in a hospital environment could occur, but I do do know enough about the DOLS process to say really.

It may help to turn off your internet connection, but we both know that other strategies may well develop to obtain alcohol.

I wish you well.

 

[Orsonkartt]

Hello, I have mentioned this subject before, but there don't seem to be many people out there with the same problem.
My husband has Alzheimer's and vascular dementia. However, my main problem is with his drinking. He cannot manage to do very much on line these days, but can still manage to order boxes of wine! He is in complete denial about the situation, but cannot function without his "red med" as he calls it. He has reduced it to a bottle a day, but is staggering around and falling over by evening time. This is not helped by his extremely low weight and lack of appetite.
I cannot get help from AA (as he is in denial) His GP is not interested (I am considering moving to another surgery)
There does not appear to be any help at all, suggestions to "water it down" are impossible to employ, he would be aware, and also I cannot spend all day opening bottles to water them down.
It may be possible to cancel the order, but he would just order more, and be very angry and agitated. (we are talking addiction here) it was suggested by a friend that I might lock him in at night, (that is when he falls, going to get more bottles and smoking) but I only tried it once! Not a good experience, and I felt very uncomfortable doing so anyway! I often have to call the ambulance for falls (they have referred him to a "falls unit" but I have not heard anything from them!
I could go on but you probably get the picture - total despair, frustration, exhaustion, stressed out etc.
Sorry for the moan, thank you for listening xxx

My wife took to drinking a bottle of wine each day. -I’ve taken to swapping no alcoholic wine into the bottles. I’ve take a few months and am now down to a 75/25 mix in favour of no alcohol

I worried she’d notice. So far so good though. My biggest problem is getting rid of zero alchahol bottles. Fingers crossed it continues

I wish you luck too !

 

[JudyA]

My OH (86) has mixed dementia (Alzheimers and vascular) and has been a whisky and ginger drinker all his life. At home I'm able to water his whisky down quite a bit as well as buying 0% beer. Since his eye sight has deteriorated I seem to be getting away with this (love lies!) and wait till he's in bed to pour the 1 litre whisky into 2 empty whisky bottles and add water, as well as get rid of the empty! But when we're out it's much more difficult and people still insist on buying him good whisky for birthdays, Christmas etc (though I tell them not too!). He's not very interested in food and will happily prefer drink instead - with food focus on crisps, chips, chocolate and biscuits! I do though make sure he has proper food every day, and give him fruit cordial with his main meal!

 

[Orsonkartt]

My OH (86) has mixed dementia (Alzheimers and vascular) and has been a whisky and ginger drinker all his life. At home I'm able to water his whisky down quite a bit as well as buying 0% beer. Since his eye sight has deteriorated I seem to be getting away with this (love lies!) and wait till he's in bed to pour the 1 litre whisky into 2 empty whisky bottles and add water, as well as get rid of the empty! But when we're out it's much more difficult and people still insist on buying him good whisky for birthdays, Christmas etc (though I tell them not too!). He's not very interested in food and will happily prefer drink instead - with food focus on crisps, chips, chocolate and biscuits! I do though make sure he has proper food every day, and give him fruit cordial with his main meal!

Sadly my wife didn’t like the flavour of the 0% beer. After much effort the local food bank recieved the unopened bottles and cans. The wine however is much closer to the real thing. Even noseco , 0% Prosecco does the job nicely