Hello. I’m new here and looking for answers and support regarding my father, who has been displaying symptoms exactly as you have described for about 2 years: behind closed doors he’s paranoid, controlling, aggressive, contrary and dangerously forgetful, but to the outside world he’s charming and playful, managing to pass his forgetfulness off as stress and/or just having a lot on his mind.
After quite an effort, which first involved my mum and I going to see his doctor to basically beg for help, he was referred to the memory clinic. Getting him there was another battle for us because he kept insisting there was nothing wrong with him, then in more lucid moments he accepted it would be a good idea to go and have a chat. The morning of the appointment came (yesterday) and after claiming he had not be told he was being sent there he got angry and refused to go. My mum managed to persuade him to go, but once inside the clinic he kicked up a fuss and refused to sign the consent form, claiming he was being tricked and that they just want to take his house away from him. The nurse said therefore she had no choice but to end the meeting. So my question is, where do we go from here? The fact that he is clearly showing signs of mental incapacity - he failed all 3 the cognitive memory tests and showed signs of confusion when the nurse tried to confirm his identity - must mean he isn’t in a position to refuse help, or does it? He spent all day yesterday following the appointment sulking in the garden, in the baking heat, refusing to speak to or even look at my mum, and when he did finally go indoors he began yelling at mum that she was mental and needed to see a doctor. It’s so upsetting, none of us know what to do now as we feel like our only lifeline has been lost.
I must say, finally, that he fell asleep again after he’d eaten his tea (he sleeps more than he’s awake) and woke up at 9pm grinning broadly and making friendly chatter with mum about the programme on the tv. Clearly the events of the day had been forgotten - but not for us. Please help!
After quite an effort, which first involved my mum and I going to see his doctor to basically beg for help, he was referred to the memory clinic. Getting him there was another battle for us because he kept insisting there was nothing wrong with him, then in more lucid moments he accepted it would be a good idea to go and have a chat. The morning of the appointment came (yesterday) and after claiming he had not be told he was being sent there he got angry and refused to go. My mum managed to persuade him to go, but once inside the clinic he kicked up a fuss and refused to sign the consent form, claiming he was being tricked and that they just want to take his house away from him. The nurse said therefore she had no choice but to end the meeting. So my question is, where do we go from here? The fact that he is clearly showing signs of mental incapacity - he failed all 3 the cognitive memory tests and showed signs of confusion when the nurse tried to confirm his identity - must mean he isn’t in a position to refuse help, or does it? He spent all day yesterday following the appointment sulking in the garden, in the baking heat, refusing to speak to or even look at my mum, and when he did finally go indoors he began yelling at mum that she was mental and needed to see a doctor. It’s so upsetting, none of us know what to do now as we feel like our only lifeline has been lost.
I must say, finally, that he fell asleep again after he’d eaten his tea (he sleeps more than he’s awake) and woke up at 9pm grinning broadly and making friendly chatter with mum about the programme on the tv. Clearly the events of the day had been forgotten - but not for us. Please help!