crisis here too

Loiner

Registered User
Oct 29, 2005
73
Leeds, UK
hi all, mums slipping away slowly, her kidneys barely have any function and she's stopped eating and drinking so they've got her on iv fluids.
They're gonna transfer her to an acute ward as soon as bed is free

hugs
David
 

connie

Registered User
Mar 7, 2004
9,519
Frinton-on-Sea
Dear David, don't despair. I am sure that all that can be done for your mum is being done, waiting is so hard.

Thinking of you, Connie
 

BeckyJan

Registered User
Nov 28, 2005
18,972
Derbyshire
Thinking about you - especially as we all know your situation could come to us all in time.

It sounds as if the care for your Mum is good. Best wishes BeckyJan
 

Loiner

Registered User
Oct 29, 2005
73
Leeds, UK
kidney function has improved, but her attitude hasn't.
She's very agressive, and doesn't like then touching her, she won't eat or drink, and they're considering putting a naso gastric tube into her, if they can keep it in.

hugs
David
 

lou lou

Registered User
Nov 9, 2005
46
London
Dear David,

I so feel for you and your mum.

My mother was admitted to hospital on the 14th of december with Kidney failure but in response to IV fluids and antibiotics she has pulled through and is now back to what is normal for mum these days and returned to her care home a couple of days ago.

We were told when she was admitted that she had hours maybe days to live and have been on a seesaw of despair and hopefulness all over christmas.

She is still not eating but is drinking again. When I am there I bully her into eating a little but I can understand why the care staff don't feel able to bully her in the way I do, there must be a fine line between care and coercion.

My mum would not want her life extended in these circumstances and my brother and I agreed to a DNR order but allowing her to die of dehydration and starvation was unthinkable. Well unthinkable for us but not for some of the medical staff apparently. Her quality of life is pretty poor with her AD but if she didn't have AD no one would dream of witholding life saving treatment.

My letter of complaint has now been sent to everyone concerned with my mothers care but sometimes I think maybe we did the wrong thing in pursuing hospital treatment, maybe we should have just let her slip away. There is a saying "Be careful of what you wish for". Then again I need to know that I have done everything reasonably possible for my mum and not allowed her to be treated with a lack of dignity and humanity.

Mum is in a care home now but the the constant worry and stress remains even though I am no longer doing the physical caring.

It's the hardest thing in the world to watch your loved ones slipping away, even more so when their demise is so inevitable but so prolonged but somewhere at least they know they were loved. My warmest thoughts are with you David, be strong.

Kind regards

Lou Lou