My mum's in mid stage Alzheimers. My brother has lived with mum and dad for 12 years, dad passed away 7 years ago. Since dad passed the brother has used his debit card to pay some of his bills, he took on online banking when it was all put in to mum's name and has moved moneys around. This only came to light when I, my sister and younger brother took POA. The brother who lives there didn't want to be involved with the POA, probably because he knew we'd find out what he was doing.
Since then he barricades the door to stop us using our key to get in whenever it's possible for us to visit, he says he wants his privacy. He used to unplug the phone, I believe that was to stop debtors ringing to get hold of him, there's always debt letters arriving there.
I confronted him about it and he unleashed a lot of personal insults so I don't go when he's there. He's gone on holiday this week, of which he didn't let us know until the last minute so we're having to organise our work around mum. She's lost a lot of weight, I don't know for certain what she eats when he's there, but when we do go and make food for her she says she's not hungry or she's not interested in anything.
I took advantage of him being away and have just had the doctor visit her to give her a general wellbeing check, we need to make appointment for bloods. We shouldn't have to creep around to arrange these appointments but if we do it when he's there he thinks we're interfering. He got mum to change her will before her diagnosis to say he could stay as long as he wants in the house when she dies, so he's been changing the flooring and other things as he says 'It'll make it easier when I try to sell it'.
For everything he's doing to make it uncomfortable for us visiting, I am angry that he's going to get away with all my dad's lifetime of hard work and live freely in a house my dad wanted us all to benefit from, and especially when the brother used to wish him dead when he was very ill.
We would be able to monitor mum properly if he wasn't there with her feeds and liquid intake but nobody seems to be interested in helping us, even social services.
Since then he barricades the door to stop us using our key to get in whenever it's possible for us to visit, he says he wants his privacy. He used to unplug the phone, I believe that was to stop debtors ringing to get hold of him, there's always debt letters arriving there.
I confronted him about it and he unleashed a lot of personal insults so I don't go when he's there. He's gone on holiday this week, of which he didn't let us know until the last minute so we're having to organise our work around mum. She's lost a lot of weight, I don't know for certain what she eats when he's there, but when we do go and make food for her she says she's not hungry or she's not interested in anything.
I took advantage of him being away and have just had the doctor visit her to give her a general wellbeing check, we need to make appointment for bloods. We shouldn't have to creep around to arrange these appointments but if we do it when he's there he thinks we're interfering. He got mum to change her will before her diagnosis to say he could stay as long as he wants in the house when she dies, so he's been changing the flooring and other things as he says 'It'll make it easier when I try to sell it'.
For everything he's doing to make it uncomfortable for us visiting, I am angry that he's going to get away with all my dad's lifetime of hard work and live freely in a house my dad wanted us all to benefit from, and especially when the brother used to wish him dead when he was very ill.
We would be able to monitor mum properly if he wasn't there with her feeds and liquid intake but nobody seems to be interested in helping us, even social services.