Concerned about my grandad

[ChloeM]

My grandad has been getting gradually more confused over the last year or so. More recently he has been having what I can only describe as mood swings and being verbally abusive to my Nanna and other family for no obvious reason. He is still driving but has been driving to the wrong places and when we tell him we are going the wrong way he gets very agitated and says that we said we wanted to go to the place he is driving too. As well as telling the same stories over and over again, he obsesses about money and thinks we are trying to strip him of his assests, which obviously we are not. We have approached him gently and asked him to see the GP but he is refusing as he doesn't think anything is wrong with him. I am very worried and distressed that something bad is going to happen soon of we don't take action. I would be so grateful if anyone could give any advise about what I can do next? Thank you

 

[karaokePete]

Hello @Chloebriggs, you are welcome here and I hope you find the forum to be a friendly and supportive place.

What you describe is, unfortunately, all too common. It is important to get a diagnosis as that may open up medication and care that you will all need if this continues for long.

When it comes to getting a loved one to the GP it is sometimes useful to contact the Dr with details of all concerns and behaviours and then collude with the GP about getting your Grandad called in on the pretext of a check-up of some sort. Sometimes the older generation will obey the GP, even when family are being refused. Of course, it's always possible that something other than dementia is causing the issues and a cure may be available for that.

Apart from that, do take a good look around the site as it is a goldmine for information. When I first joined I read old threads for information but then found the AS Publications list and the page where a post code search can be done to check for support services in one's own area if a dementia diagnosis is given. If you are interested in these, clicking the following links will take you there.

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you

You will see that there are Fact sheets that will help with things like getting a diagnosis, care needs assessments, deciding the level of care required and sorting out useful things like Wills, Power of Attorney etc.

 

[Shedrech]

hello @Chloebriggs
a warm welcome from me too
another way to get your grandad to the GP might be to have your nanna make an appointment telling your grandad it's for her and asking him to go along too to 'hold her hand'
well before the appointment send a list of your observations and concerns to the GP and say your nanna will be attending so the GP can just turn to your grandad and say 'might as well have a quick look at you too, 2 for the price of 1' or something similar ... I hope they have a co-operative GP

 

[MrsBen]

My grandad has been getting gradually more confused over the last year or so. More recently he has been having what I can only describe as mood swings and being verbally abusive to my Nanna and other family for no obvious reason. He is still driving but has been driving to the wrong places and when we tell him we are going the wrong way he gets very agitated and says that we said we wanted to go to the place he is driving too. As well as telling the same stories over and over again, he obsesses about money and thinks we are trying to strip him of his assests, which obviously we are not. We have approached him gently and asked him to see the GP but he is refusing as he doesn't think anything is wrong with him. I am very worried and distressed that something bad is going to happen soon of we don't take action. I would be so grateful if anyone could give any advise about what I can do next? Thank you

Bless him, very difficult. Does the GP have a memory clinic? He needs to be seen as soon as possible for them to assess him. Can you ask the GP what they would advise?