Big deterioration in the last few days!
- Thread starter LadyA
- Start date
Hope the next 36hrs or so are not too difficult LadyA - I would imagine you will want to sleep for a week when William initially has the respite - > care. Tough times for you but you have done so well. Hope it's as good a night as possible xx
Sent from my SM-T310 using Talking Point mobile app
Sent from my SM-T310 using Talking Point mobile app
Was literally praying all evening that he would be calm and peaceful about getting changed. By bedtime, I was almost in tears about it. And he behaved wonderfully - not a bother! I was so stressed about it, because all day, although he would keep giving me hugs, at other times I was getting the ice-cold, challenging stare, for no reason - I still have "collywobbles" in my tummy about it!
Desperately hoping tomorrow will go ok.
Desperately hoping tomorrow will go ok.
Only one more night to go! Last night he was up for over 3 hours. Got his coat on over his pj's. Wouldn't take it off. Wouldn't get back in bed - although kept coming back to me, and seemed to be wanting to get back in, but when I'd try and guide him, he'd push me out of his way and walk off again! Finally got him back to bed at almost 6. Hoping he'll sleep for another hour or so.
Finally got him back to bed at almost 6. Hoping he'll sleep for another hour or so.
Well, maybe it's just as well he's been such a nightmare this weekend, because it has driven it home in no uncertain terms how unmanageable he has become! Two hours it took this morning to persuade him that getting dressed was not something "evil", and it was really ok for him to get dressed! Finally he got it - before that, he was clawing at me when I tried to change him so I had to leave it with only the soaked pad changed. I think his paranoia is breaking through, because he said "If you were a lawyer you could.. ". I strongly suspect he could do with a sit on the loo, but he refuses to entertain the suggestion at all - especially once he realises it means his trousers have to come down! Sigh!
Sent from my C1905 using Talking Point mobile app
Sent from my C1905 using Talking Point mobile app
In the Order of Good Natured Folks, you certainly come top of the list LadyA. Nothing ever seems to phase you and I just hope I have half your tenacity and patience when it comes to my turn. I know that right now, I am still struggling with working out that this is FTD which is driving my man and not some form of b.........y mindedness! X Shelagh
In the Order of Good Natured Folks, you certainly come top of the list LadyA. Nothing ever seems to phase you and I just hope I have half your tenacity and patience when it comes to my turn. I know that right now, I am still struggling with working out that this is FTD which is driving my man and not some form of b.........y mindedness! X Shelagh
I get well and truly fazed Shelagh! But I've learned over the years that "this too shall pass ".
A large group from his church were just here to sing for him. Despite my best intentions, I ended up in tears.
Sent from my C1905 using Talking Point mobile app
How are you doing Alice? i am guessing, mixed emotions. I am sending love for a peaceful space of time for you and William until tomorrow, and beyond. Hold fast! All, as you say, will be well and all manner of thing will be well. x Shelagh
Every evening, we used to pass the time until his bedtime watching something on dvd. It was so hard to find something that would last a while, engage his interest, not bore me to death (he doesn't like movies), etc. And the last couple of years, since he wouldn't go to the Library any more - and wouldn't give me time to look through their collection of dvds to pick something from there, so I had to keep buying things for him - it cost me a bomb! He loves nature documentaries, wildlife, gardening - anything like that. But more recently, he is less fussy, and more inclined to watch whatever I'm watching, as long as it's fairly "harmless" and has nice scenery! So way back, in Spring or early Summer, I invested in the complete box set of All Creatures Great & Small - all seven series! And we've been watching one or two episodes of that every evening. Believe it or not, tonight, William's last night at home, we watched the last episode.
Thankfully too, I got him undressed and changed for bed without any bother other than a bit of complaining. I have a supply of extra medication to be used "on days of extra agitation" - and I figured this weekend has surely been a time of "extra agitation", so he's had some extra, and it seemed to work well. Now there's only tomorrow morning to get through, and the Care Assistant will be here in the morning.
Thankfully too, I got him undressed and changed for bed without any bother other than a bit of complaining. I have a supply of extra medication to be used "on days of extra agitation" - and I figured this weekend has surely been a time of "extra agitation", so he's had some extra, and it seemed to work well. Now there's only tomorrow morning to get through, and the Care Assistant will be here in the morning.
Extremely, Izzy. Thank you. It really does feel like losing him. But I do know I can't go on with the daily battles - and apart from that, how long would it be before his skin would break down because of not being cleaned? I'm doing very well if I can get the wet pads off (and I literally have to force them off - dragging accross his skin, not good!) and get a dry one on. He hasn't been cleaned since Friday evening! One person simply can't change a pad, clean the person and fend off that person's attacking hands as well! I got two out of three fairly well done - Got the pad changed and fended off the hands!
And while part of me is heartbroken to be parting with him, I have to admit, part of me feels such tremendous relief that I won't have to be living in fear of his moods and aggression, and having to try and deal with taking care of dressing him, changing him etc. when he is so terribly resistant to personal care, any more. And knowing that I won't be spending half the night listening to him banging around, hoping he won't fall, and then dealing with him when he comes back to try and get back to bed - and then decides he won't go back to bed. Then comes back again five minutes later and on and on and on! Three hours that went on last night, before he finally got back into bed and settled down.I have you in my thoughts too, it is a difficult time for you, and Ihope tomorrow goes calmly. Jeannette
Lady A
it has taken me seven and a half months to come to terms (somewhat) with Tom being in the CH..
But there is a whole team of people not just me.
it has taken me seven and a half months to come to terms (somewhat) with Tom being in the CH..
But there is a whole team of people not just me.
LadyA, I hope you and William have as peaceful a night as possible and it goes smoothly with the carer in the morning and for your trip to the CH - it must be very tough, in different ways for you over these days but you have my admiration how you (like nellbelles) have fought so hard to get what you know is the best scenario of care for your husbands. Take care xx
Sent from my SM-T310 using Talking Point mobile app
Sent from my SM-T310 using Talking Point mobile app
