Thank you .mum has lived there for 45years and nos all the neighbours and being in the country she can still have her little walks as she has always done she can still have s laugh with neighbours which is lovely to see she is still very mobile better than me just her alzheimers but she still nos she dosent want to go into a care home and this is her wishes and im happy to care for her. And i feel it is more important for mum to see her days there as long as possible as she can stay with her same doctors who she has been with since a child and no her . The repairs are things that can be fixed with mums money and she could possably get a grant for a walk in shower at hers. If she wss to have a needs assesment Im the one who has cared for her the last four years and she had been coming to me most weekends for breaks when my dad died in 2007 whom i spent alot of time with taking him to hospital appointments etc and new his wishes that was to get the planning which i have done so there are choices for mum so the house does not need to be sold just my hot headed brother that is trying to push it which i dont agree would be in the best intrest for my mum and that was why i did the health and welfare and property and finance so her wishes could be taken care of sorry it sounded so confusing not used to putting down things very well but hope uou understand it abit better now. Thank you for listening
Advice.
- Thread starter ljgret
- Start date
Hi, @ljgret . I hope I’m understanding things here. Are you the person with LPA, or is that jointly with your brother? If it’s just you, then your brother has no material say in what happens to your mother’s property. . Does your mum have capacity to understand what might happen in the future? If she does, how does she feel about her home being sold? From what I’ve read, it would seem that what you really want is the status quo, which is that your mums home should be repaired to the required standard so she can continue to live in it and you can continue to look after her. I would imagine that even if the house were put up for sale, all necessary repairs would need to be done before completion would take place , so it’s hard to see how your brother thinks money would be saved.
As far as the proposed bungalow is concerned, I’d maybe put that on the back burner for a little while to see how things go. As I understand it, your mum has her own home (once the necessary repairs are done) , you have your own home (a useful escape valve when you need it) which is nearby to enable you to provide care. My advice would be to not complicate things if you don’t need to. I do hope I haven’t misunderstood anything.
As far as the proposed bungalow is concerned, I’d maybe put that on the back burner for a little while to see how things go. As I understand it, your mum has her own home (once the necessary repairs are done) , you have your own home (a useful escape valve when you need it) which is nearby to enable you to provide care. My advice would be to not complicate things if you don’t need to. I do hope I haven’t misunderstood anything.
Does your mother have a Will?
It may pay to inform your brother, that any sale of the house, and money raised will be Mothers, and not split untill her death and then only under the terms of her Will/ Intestate.
There will of course be expense's paid from these funds, both during her lifetime, and after.
Do not completely write off Care Home's, my father had to go in, and really blossomed in his. The papers are full of bad reports, but never tell the good stories, of which there are many more.
Bod
Hi Yes i have LPA but my brother is on it too. Its him thats wanting to sell and put the money into mums account. And yes i see it if mum. Was in her own home she would have the best of both worlds because she and i could have a change of scenery she remembers her neighbours which she can have a laugh with still she constantly forgets but whenever ive spoken to her about a care home she has always said she dosent want to go in one. Thats why i took out the health and welfare But the thing is once the repairs are done she can still go home because id be with her 24/7 then some days we could change and go to mine as she has been doing for years and this would break it up for me as mum lives in the country and is well known in her village and its lovely place to end her days she has 1on 1 care with me wont get that in a care home there are also things the social services could help with like probably getting a wet room fitted to make life easier to wash her i no its going to get harder but would get the support of extra help when it is needed my elder brother was living with mum so she had help there but as i got him on the council waiting list a property came up and he took it but he also needs help as he is dyslexic but is only 5 mins up the road . We had to clear mums house as she was a hoarder and it was bad it was after this vlear out to make it safe mum had a water leak thats when my brother lost his head and said it was going to be sold and thatbwas that but just because mums brain is failing dosent give him the right to sell the house before other options have been considered we have a builder in the family who has been all around the house and said its mainly cosmetic but my bro is still digging his heels in and not looking at things rationally. Id like to no if mum is allowed to spend her own money to do the repairs i cannot see a reason why not as it would only improve surely the value when sold in the future. I control mums money my brother did ask for the card but he has no right to it as im mums carer.
It’s always a problem when people who are joint attorneys for a loved one do not agree. Do you know if you can act jointly and severally, or only jointly which means you must agree and cannot act independently? Does your mum have capacity to make decisions ? If your mother has the means to pay for repairs/improvements to her home, I don’t think there’s anything to stop her doing so. If she no longer has capacity to make these decisions then you can do so provided you think it’s in her best interests. A word of warning, though: Social Services are usually pretty helpful in providing aids around the home, such as grab rails, seats for the shower, etc. but I certainly wouldn’t expect them to fit a wet room in a privately owned home. If you wanted this, you’d have to pay for it yourself.
If your brother doesn’t agree with any of this, I’d be wanting to know who he thinks is going to look after her in the future and where the looking after will take place if her home is sold.
If your brother doesn’t agree with any of this, I’d be wanting to know who he thinks is going to look after her in the future and where the looking after will take place if her home is sold.
Unfortunately, as your brother is also LPA, it is highly likely that he has the same rights as you. Goes without saying that neither of you can use your Mum's card, and that with or without her permission
.
@My Mum's Daughter is right. Bank cards cannot be passed around for use by anyone other than the account holder. Being a carer does not give rights to use someone else's card. It is possible, and the correct way to proceed, for a person holding LPA to register this with the bank. This usually involves an interview where documentation and ID will be reviewed. The bank may issue a new card to the Attorney which clearly indicates that they are representing and acting on behalf of the account holder.
I have a card in my name (as her Attorney) for my wife's account, for example. I don't let anyone else use it, including the other person named as her Attorney.
I have a card in my name (as her Attorney) for my wife's account, for example. I don't let anyone else use it, including the other person named as her Attorney.
My brother is expecting me still permantly look after my mum at my house which was not the plan mum wanted. mum does seem to understand somethings but they have never even asked mum at anypoint what her wishes were that was the reason i got the power of attorneys done for her when she did have capacity years ago shes still very mobile but is slowly slipping with capacity.
Be warned-my sister post stroke- applid to her coucil for a bathroom conversion grant, and got one awarded.
The choice of bathroom fixtures/fittings was very limited, works had to be done by council contrators and they had to contribute £15k!!
Have you registered the POA at the bank? they should have issued both attorneys with cards you shouldnt be using mums
The choice of bathroom fixtures/fittings was very limited, works had to be done by council contrators and they had to contribute £15k!!
Have you registered the POA at the bank? they should have issued both attorneys with cards you shouldnt be using mums
I have the right to mums bank account as it was all set up when she had full capacity and done properly at the bank with her . My brother dies not have that. Thank god.
Yes have full poa which my brother is on. i hold the documents and all the bank card which was sorted years ago when she had capacity my brother doesnt.
if your brother is aso an attorney, he has equal rights- sorry
So the bank card he hs ( in mums name) is of little consequence if you have one of your own.
Check with the bank if any third party access or additional card(s) set up while account holder had capacity remains valid if holder looses capacity, I suspect it will not be valid else there would not be any need for LPAs, a general power of attorney without any COP involvement would suffice.
An EPA endures loss of capacity, an LPA lasts when capacity is lost.
Both brother and you have full access to her finances acting as LPA.
I was the only one who registered The Banjoman’s LPA with his bank and I was the only one issued with a debit card. If any of the other three attorneys had wanted to have access to his account they would have had to do the same as me, register it with the bank personally, they did not automatically get access to anything despite being named on the LPA.
He has never had a bank card he left that to me to sort. Since ive taken over she is well off she had nothing and got herself in debts every where. which i slowly had to sort and paid off.
We have full p.o.a for health and welfare yes my brother could ho and get a bank card with proof of lasting power but he has never done it left that to me. He just dosent want mum going back into her own home want me to cate for her at mine but the caring was suposed to done in her own house and have the needs assesment done when needed. Anyway.if she cannot go home to hers it will force me to put her in a five star home the least she deserves.
Yes im the only one with access yes like you say he could take the copies of p.o.a if he wanted one but hasnt i have the psper copies as it was me that set it all up for mum just umfortunate i chose the wrong brother to be joint on the p.o.a i should of left my elder brother who was living with mum but i got him on the council list and he now has a bungalow 5 mins up the road from mums house. He agrees with me as he new what mums wishes were.
Did you mean joint and several?
If joint you have to act together in signing cheques, setting up direct debits etc.
I don't know of any bank that issues cards or allows internet banking for joint attorneys , the bank has no proof that attorneys are acting together.
I have to use mums card to take her shopping only i have a card because we set it up with the p.o.a i have both health and welfare and property and finance.
Similar threads
