Dear Sylvia,
Although I am rarely on TP any longer, I still follow your thread. Dhiren and my Dad went into homes at the same time and their paths seemed to run in parallel (until Dad sadly died in 2012.)
Is there a Registered Nurse in Dhiren's home? After Dad's distressing treatment in hospital I asked what they would actually do for him if he had had a stroke. The answer was that they would do more tests, but the treatment would be the same as if he hadn't had another stroke. That treatment could be managed by the nurses in his home, overseen by our lovely supportive GP. Armed with that information I decided to put in writing on his file that Dad was never to go into hospital again. It was the best decision I could have made. Dad died peacefully 18 months after his last hospital admission. In that time he had a number of occasions when he was put on the Liverpool Care Pathway, lying in a coma with the whole family gathered around his bedside. In all but the last time, he recovered again, was taken off the pathway, and most importantly, he remained in the peace of his familiar surroundings. It was a personal decision made by our whole family, and one of my sisters struggled with it at first. (She had not had to witness his extreme distress on a Care of the Elderly ward, where most of the patients had dementia. Shockingly, most of the staff could not understand how their behaviour towards their patients exacerbated the distress.) However, we talked her round, and I am so glad we did. I'm not telling you that you should do the same as us, but I do think you should consider whether the benefits of a hospital admission outweigh the dangers.
Sending you and Dhiren my love and most warm wishes for a speedy recovery. I love the serenity of his smile while he sits up in his own bed.
Sue xxx