Thank you everyone. Your words mean so much. I'm beyond exhausted at the moment. Trying to organise things, deal with visitors. etc.
The funeral is to be on Saturday at 2 p.m. Several of William's family are coming from the US. They will be spread among acquaintances for accommodation. Some are hiring cars, so they can car-pool.
I have a vague list in my head of Things To Do: 1. Confirm Funeral arrangements with the Funeral Director. 2. Contact GP re Death Certificate (trust William to die on a Bank Holiday - out of hours doctor had to be called to verify death, and now GP will have to issue death certificate based on his condition as known during the week.). 3. Contact Dept. of Social Welfare (or whatever they are called this year) re William's pension and apply for Widow's Pension. And hope there isn't too much of a gap between when they cut off William's pension and when they provide Widow's Pension! 4. Get on with details of the funeral service! 5. Once they have packed them up, collect William's things from the nursing home, and drop off the picture I got for them. It's words from a song, printed on canvas: "Lean on me when you're not strong, And I'll be your friend, I'll help you carry on. For it won't be long 'til I'm gonna need somebody to lean on." I thought it very suitable for a nursing home. 6 and probably most important. get cat milk! Poor Lizzy is feeling a bit stressed at all the comings and goings.
Dau isn't due home until morning. But SIL came today and spent all day here, not in my face, but working around outside and popping in and out. My lovely neighbour came first with a packet of choccie biccies. Then later with two enormous platters of sandwiches, because there are bound to be visitors. And then a third time turned up with a dish of freshly made lasagne, insisting that I need to eat! Bless her. People are so nice.
I have chosen the hymns: Holy, Holy Holy, Lord God Almighty is one. Then "I'll Praise my Maker with my breath (and when my voice is lost in death, Praise shall employ my nobler powers)", "Lift your glad voices in triumph on high" and "In Thee is gladness amid all sadness, Jesus sunshine of my heart." William did not want funeral hymns at his funeral - he wanted hymns of triumph.
And there is this poem which he wanted read too.
Ask Me
I want to be touched by affectionate eyes
I want to be welcomed when welcome is rare;
I want to be held when my confidence sighs,
I want to find comfort in genuine care.
I want to be given untakeable things,
I want to be trusted with hearts that might break
I want to fly dreaming on efortless wings,
I want to be smiled on when I awake.
I want to see sunsets with people who know,
I want to hear secrets that no one should hear,
I want to be guarded wherever I go,
I want to be fought for when dangers appear.
I want to be chained to the lives of my friends,
I want to be wanted because and despite,
I want to link arms when the foolishness ends,
I want to be safe in the raging night.
I want to be sheltered although I am wrong,
I want to be laughed at although I am right,
I want to be sung in the heavenly song,
I want to be loved - I want to be light.