I read this post thismorning....and have had all day to "mull it over"
I think it's a very important issue....
a) I drive away from home and leave Eric in the hands of sitters who depend on my return. God forbid...but if I didn't return what would happen to Eric? But there is a card in my car that explains our situation...
b) If I had a "major" health issue..as in life threatening....surgery or whatever...I'd call in the troops..Eric's care would be out of my hands..and I want to live...
c) Of course if I was to collapse on the floor here and unable to help myself..then I would be beyond help....because Eric wouldn't know what to do..except to call for me and try to wake me up..maybe. But I try not to think about that scenario.
I think it is inevitable that we sometimes put ourselves second. We must recognise this behaviour when it occurs. I also think that social services rely on us taking on as much as we can!
.....
Katie...I agree to a point....but,speaking personally, this our married life...and if Eric had any other illness which I felt able to cope with I would still be there to care...for as long as I felt I was able and willing to. For his sake. It's not about putting myself second....it's about looking after the man that I married and who, before this illness, was my friend and soulmate...and is still my husband. Social Services have offered varying options which don't meet our needs but I'm working with them to find suitable alternatives. Don't forget it's not just me, the carer,it's my husband too. Any solution has to work for both of us... As Eric's disease progresses things will inevitably change...I'm learning to "go with the flow"...there is no perfect solution.
Helen..to come back to your original question....
What sort of short term care, if any is available out there?
That question I think applies to many of us whose OH's will not admit to needing help in anyway..
Well..Eric doesn't "think" he needs help....but somehow "knows" that he does....and does begrudgingly accept it...
Have you had a carers' assessment and do you have any support?
There is help available..but you have to ask for it. Even if your OH denies that you need it...
Love xx