My father has lived with dementia for 10 years and is now, age 90, in the later stages.of the disease . In this time I have cared for him and nearly made myself ill whilst looking after family and trying to keep a business going . I had to find a ‘care’ home for him 6 years ago as I could no longer cope. We have had so many issues with the homes . He is now in his 3rd and hopefully final place. In his last ‘Care’ Home he was assaulted by another resident twice, quite violently, and abused by staff . For the last 9 months I have been my father’s voice trying to get some justice for his poor care. He was once a fit and highly intelligent man and doesn’t deserve to be treated like this. We have complained to the home, the CQC , his social worker , the ombudsman’ with little result or recompense for my fathers welfare. The head of the social care/ safeguarding team told me my Dad wouldn’t remember the abuse so not to get upset ........ All this costs money and it is on top of the thousands of pounds a month that my dad has to pay as he is self funding . If he had any other type of illness we would get help with his funding and it would be possible to find support for his poor care. I have spent years trying to get care and help for Dad only to run round in circles . I truly hope the recent publicity brings about a change and others don’t have to suffer as my father and our family have .
He is now in a nursing home where the staff are wonderful and the care is excellent. The fees are now over £5000 a month. I left him today, so frail, hardly able to see, and shouting away in his terribly tortured world. Hopefully with more people speaking out and describing life with dementia and all the issues that arise it will no longer be brushed under the carpet. It must be the most devastating disease that impacts both the person and family and I hope in the near future it gets the support, funding and understanding it deserves.
Unbearably sad and so unfair