I have had a terrible time coping with my mother in law with dementia. She is vile to me, swearing and cursing, and threatened me with her stick, locked me out of the house and even bit me when I tried to help her out of her seat. As she has refused all medical and other support, I have been largely on my own with her 24/7, with the disturbed sleep and all the rest I am sure you know. Her remaining blood relations live 400 miles away, and between us, the telephone and e mail, we managed to set up all the legal requirements to protect her as the disease progresses.
Mother in law's constant request was to return to her birthplace in the north, and she wanted me to come with her. My GP is concerned for my physical and mental health, and ruled this an impossibility in the short term, and probably not a good idea at all as I know no one there and would be isolated still further. Her family, with my support, have achieved this move into sheltered accommodation - as she is adamant that she will not go into a care home. She remembers the telephone number here, and has rung at all times of the day and night, demanding I come to fetch her and bring her back or that I pack my bags and get there double-quick. As a result, I have changed the number, and contact is through my late husband's cousin. I feel so guilty about this, but know it is for the best for my health. It isn't a bereavement as such, as she is neither dead nor has she actually forgotten me. I feel lost and don't really know why, as I can now take up my own life again - I have some good friends - but I cannot shake off the guilt and of course, she is the last link to my late husband.
Mother in law's constant request was to return to her birthplace in the north, and she wanted me to come with her. My GP is concerned for my physical and mental health, and ruled this an impossibility in the short term, and probably not a good idea at all as I know no one there and would be isolated still further. Her family, with my support, have achieved this move into sheltered accommodation - as she is adamant that she will not go into a care home. She remembers the telephone number here, and has rung at all times of the day and night, demanding I come to fetch her and bring her back or that I pack my bags and get there double-quick. As a result, I have changed the number, and contact is through my late husband's cousin. I feel so guilty about this, but know it is for the best for my health. It isn't a bereavement as such, as she is neither dead nor has she actually forgotten me. I feel lost and don't really know why, as I can now take up my own life again - I have some good friends - but I cannot shake off the guilt and of course, she is the last link to my late husband.