Turning point?

[velademar]

My OH has frontotemporal dementia with behavioural changes along with memory, speech lack of self regulation and process issues. He sings the same songs over and over and taps/bangs along to the tune when he gets excited, but has been generally OK to sort out as long as I'm telling him what he needs to do as we go along. However he has been getting worse these last few weeks and I'm now finding it difficult to control him in public or at home. He used to stop his behaviours when I told him but now he ignores me and just carries on. Tonight I was in the kitchen and I heard a large bang upstairs he'd been standing on a chair to reach a clock that he said was wrong (it wasn't) and he'd dropped it. He wouldn't come down off the chair and it took me ages to persuade him. He has balance problems and I'm scared he will hurt himself at some point but as I feel I can't control his actions now I'm not sure how to deal with it all. Anyone else having similar issues, it felt like a turning point tonight in me being able to cope.

 

[annieka 56]

I feel it's like doing a regular risk assessment (fond ? memories of the world of work!) in every room that he accesses.
So currently no tablets of soap in the bathroom in a pretty dish since he recently took a big bite out one that must have looked like a chunk of cheese. Emptying all open bins frequently and checking for remote controls, keys that might be in there, having closed bins that he can't open.
Not many nice things around that can get moved or broken.
Different hiding places for things that are needed several times a day like hand wipes, hand sanitisers, Nilaqua body cleaners, a stack of baby soft flannels.
I really feel for you with the dreaded bang from upstairs!! For me it's the fear that his beloved dog who only wants to be near him has got up there (he can no longer get downstairs) and he's tripped over her.
I suggest having a plan for if he does fall or hurt himself (terrifying) that has to involve ringing for assistance.
(We do have a male carer now for my husband but they are strictly not allowed to assist someone getting up from the floor after a fall. But at least it's another person around on and off throughout the day.)

I really feel for you, it's so so hard and I don't think you can control his actions.
Good luck.

 

[annieka 56]

I feel it's like doing a regular risk assessment (fond ? memories of the world of work!) in every room that he accesses.
So currently no tablets of soap in the bathroom in a pretty dish since he recently took a big bite out one that must have looked like a chunk of cheese. Emptying all open bins frequently and checking for remote controls, keys that might be in there, having closed bins that he can't open.
Not many nice things around that can get moved or broken.
Different hiding places for things that are needed several times a day like hand wipes, hand sanitisers, Nilaqua body cleaners, a stack of baby soft flannels.
I really feel for you with the dreaded bang from upstairs!! For me it's the fear that his beloved dog who only wants to be near him has got up there (he can no longer get downstairs) and he's tripped over her.
I suggest having a plan for if he does fall or hurt himself (terrifying) that has to involve ringing for assistance.
(We do have a male carer now for my husband but they are strictly not allowed to assist someone getting up from the floor after a fall. But at least it's another person around on and off throughout the day.)

I really feel for you, it's so so hard and I don't think you can control his actions.
Good luck.

 

[annieka 56]

I feel it's like doing a regular risk assessment (fond ? memories of the world of work!) in every room that he accesses.
So currently no tablets of soap in the bathroom in a pretty dish since he recently took a big bite out one that must have looked like a chunk of cheese. Emptying all open bins frequently and checking for remote controls, keys that might be in there, having closed bins that he can't open.
Not many nice things around that can get moved or broken.
Different hiding places for things that are needed several times a day like hand wipes, hand sanitisers, Nilaqua body cleaners, a stack of baby soft flannels.
I really feel for you with the dreaded bang from upstairs!! For me it's the fear that his beloved dog who only wants to be near him has got up there (he can no longer get downstairs) and he's tripped over her.
I suggest having a plan for if he does fall or hurt himself (terrifying) that has to involve ringing for assistance.
(We do have a male carer now for my husband but they are strictly not allowed to assist someone getting up from the floor after a fall. But at least it's another person around on and off throughout the day.)

I really feel for you, it's so so hard and I don't think you can control his actions.
Good luck.

I feel it's like doing a regular risk assessment (fond ? memories of the world of work!) in every room that he accesses.
So currently no tablets of soap in the bathroom in a pretty dish since he recently took a big bite out one that must have looked like a chunk of cheese. Emptying all open bins frequently and checking for remote controls, keys that might be in there, having closed bins that he can't open.
Not many nice things around that can get moved or broken.
Different hiding places for things that are needed several times a day like hand wipes, hand sanitisers, Nilaqua body cleaners, a stack of baby soft flannels.
I really feel for you with the dreaded bang from upstairs!! For me it's the fear that his beloved dog who only wants to be near him has got up there (he can no longer get downstairs) and he's tripped over her.
I suggest having a plan for if he does fall or hurt himself (terrifying) that has to involve ringing for assistance.
(We do have a male carer now for my husband but they are strictly not allowed to assist someone getting up from the floor after a fall. But at least it's another person around on and off throughout the day.)

I really feel for you, it's so so hard and I don't think you can control his actions.
Good luck.

Sorry I repeated the same reply twice.

 

[ChaceSoto]

It is difficult to cope with behavioral changes and worry about the safety of your loved one. You are not alone in this situation, and many people go through similar experiences. Try seeking support from professionals such as doctors, dementia consultants or support groups. They can offer tips and strategies to better cope with behavioral changes and keep your partner safe.