Say hello and introduce yourself

northumbrian_k

Volunteer Host
Mar 2, 2017
4,583
0
Newcastle
Hi @Ravenbrand and welcome to the Forum. Our community of members with experience of dementia is a great place to share with people who truly understand, to find helpful ideas and to let off steam.
 

JHB

New member
May 4, 2024
4
0
Hide the scissors and buy him some boxing gloves, try using a pair of scissors with those on, isn't easy. Please appreciate I say this lightheartedly let's see what others suggest. K
that did make me chuckle. I did hide the scissors but being a resourceful man the next night he found a multi-tool penknife and used that. I thought scissors might be a "safer" option!! atm he is waking up hourly thru the night. The Community Nurse came round to assess things and his medication is being tweaked so, even if it takes some time to stabilise, I am now getting some help.
 

JusS26

New member
May 10, 2024
1
0
Hi, I am brand new to the forum and brand new to Alzheimers, sadly, as my mum, at the age of 80, has just been diagnosed this week.
I really have no idea what lies ahead of us, or how, when, or if, her condition will deteriorate, and if so, how quickly. She has just received her first medication, so hopefully that will have a positive impact.
The most frustrating aspect is the fact that for a woman of her age, mum is an incredibly fit and healthy lady, excluding her poor recall.
We are embarking on a journey that I can only imagine is not going to be in any way fun, for any of us, sadly. It feels like the beginning of a very sad ending.
 

Chizz

Registered User
Jan 10, 2023
3,768
0
Kent
Hi, I am brand new to the forum and brand new to Alzheimers, sadly, as my mum, at the age of 80, has just been diagnosed this week.
I really have no idea what lies ahead of us, or how, when, or if, her condition will deteriorate, and if so, how quickly. She has just received her first medication, so hopefully that will have a positive impact.
The most frustrating aspect is the fact that for a woman of her age, mum is an incredibly fit and healthy lady, excluding her poor recall.
We are embarking on a journey that I can only imagine is not going to be in any way fun, for any of us, sadly. It feels like the beginning of a very sad ending.
Welcome to this forum @JusS26
There are a lot of carers, at various stages, who will be able to advise you. If you haven't, then have a browse of the wealth of info on the Alz's Soc website, and their information leaflets.
Everyone will tell you that each person with dementia's (PWD) journey is individual. The rate of the deterioration of the brain is personal. Some stages overlap; but the journey, sad to say, is always downward. Sometime a few steps back but, if so, not for long. So, yes, your mum will get worse.
The failing memory, or failing communication, can knock someone's confidence and this changes them as well. Gradually a PWD finds it difficult to make or weigh up decisions and as a carer you have to limit the distress this might cause by limiting the choices. For example, my OH (other half) was always v particular about her clothes, choices, colours, etc, but gradually this became a worry. So I would hang out 3 outfits and say shall we have this one? Gradually, she became less interested in make-up, which for my OH was a big step. Of course, in the greater scheme of things, none of this really matters, but it does change the person as you know or knew them.

Any particular queries, ask away.

Best wishes, and a virtual hug.
 

Gosling

Volunteer Host
Aug 2, 2022
1,881
0
South West UK
Hello @JusS26 and a welcome from me also to this friendly and supportive forum.
I am sorry to read about your Mum's recent diagnosis. It's tough for sure, even if you were half expecting it.
As has been said, everyone's journey through this awful disease is different - so please don't think that everything that you read about on here will happen to your Mum. The important thing to remember, as it is a progressive disease, is that now is the best your Mum will be. I am attaching two links for information: On a practical note: the Lasting Power of attorney one would be sensible to get going pretty promptly, for both the health and welfare one and the property and financial one. This will make things a lot easier for you further down the track.
Do also have a good look around the forums and ask any particular questions you may like to. You will always find understanding and a listening ear here.
 

Peachey 54

New member
May 11, 2024
1
0
Hello I am Rachel, I have a parent who has Dementia and one who won't ask for help so that makes it extra difficult not to worry. I have tried asking the Vicar to have a chat generally with them but Dad is incredibly private. I am on my own with them and My Sister is just living her best life as if nothing is happening over here. I have Mental Health issues myself. Thank Goodness i am an Avid Reader!!
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
82,026
0
Kent
Welcome @Peachey 54 I hope you will find the forum helpful and informative.

If your parents are unable to ask for help do you think you could ask for help as their carer?

Have you had a carers assessment? This will give you some ideas about help available for you.
 

Gosling

Volunteer Host
Aug 2, 2022
1,881
0
South West UK
Hello and welcome @Peachey 54 from me also to this friendly and supportive forum.

I am sorry to read about your parents situation. Often the way, too private and/or proud to ask for help.
As has been suggested, do try to get Social Services involved with a carers assessment for yourself. Your own physical and mental health is important too.
Do please have a good look around the forums, and ask any particular questions you may like to. Members here really do want to help. and there is lots of shared experience of the various facets of dementia to be found. You'll also find total understanding.
 

thesoundone

New member
May 17, 2024
1
0
Hello everyone my name is Jim and I'm here because my mum (75) was diagnosed with Alzheimer's a couple of years ago. She has had memory loss for a long time on and off but in the past few weeks she has progressed quite a bit. She lives with Dad and they've been married for nearly 50 years but she suddenly thinks (this is on and off) they haven't seen each other for years and have just met again. We're trying to get them to downsize to another house in a place with more going on such as shops public transport etc. just surprised how much it's progressed in only a few weeks. Has anyone else experienced this?
 

Gosling

Volunteer Host
Aug 2, 2022
1,881
0
South West UK
Hello Jim @thesoundone and firstly welcome to this friendly and supportive community. There is a wealth of shared experience of dementia to be found here so I am glad you have found us.
I am sorry to read about your Mum. Alzheimer’s can have a sudden and quite rapid progression, and then can plateau for a while. It may be that .
Has she been checked out for a possible UTI as this can bring about a sudden change in behaviour?
One word of caution about moving , although I fully understand and realise your reasons for doing so. It’s just that people with dementia like familiarity of surroundings. Change can be quite difficult. Please do bear that in mind.
Anyway do have a good look around the forums and ask any particular questions you may like to. Members here really do want to help.
 

SeaSwallow

Volunteer Moderator
Oct 28, 2019
6,232
0
Hello @thesoundone and welcome to the forum. I am sorry to hear about your mum, it can be so difficult to care for someone with Alzheimer's or any form of dementia.

If this is a very sudden downturn I would suggest that you get your mum checked for a UTI (urinary tract infection) as they can cause havoc in a person with dementia and lead to the sort of downturn that you are describing.

Regarding the move to a smaller house, please think very carefully about that, because of the memory loss that you have described there is a possibility that your mum would not be able to cope with a move to a new house/environment, would not be able to find herself around a new house which would only put more strain on your dad.
 

MBrooky

Registered User
Mar 15, 2022
18
0
Hello @thesoundone and welcome to the forum. I am sorry to hear about your mum, it can be so difficult to care for someone with Alzheimer's or any form of dementia.

If this is a very sudden downturn I would suggest that you get your mum checked for a UTI (urinary tract infection) as they can cause havoc in a person with dementia and lead to the sort of downturn that you are describing.

Regarding the move to a smaller house, please think very carefully about that, because of the memory loss that you have described there is a possibility that your mum would not be able to cope with a move to a new house/environment, would not be able to find herself around a new house which would only put more strain on your dad.
Good luck, God bless u.
 

MBrooky

Registered User
Mar 15, 2022
18
0
a nice place to be Martin! , particularly at this time of year , late spring, and the summer to enjoy ☀️
Nice place but quiet lonely, most properties are only occupied by visitors who stay for two weeks at the most and usually come with friends or family.
 

Kittica

New member
May 19, 2024
1
0
Hello...
My husband of almost 54 years has middle/late stages of mixed dementia... mainly Alzheimer's with a bit of Vascular dementia. He has recently gone into a care home.
I am so lost, lonely in the "crowd". I can't begin to explain properly. It occurs to me that I can maybe help others as well as receive support from others in a similar situation.
 

Kevinl

Registered User
Aug 24, 2013
6,677
0
Salford
Lonely, easy to spell hard to live with, after something over 10 years on the site here I found it lonely caring than now it's just me to look after which is the hardest, time will tell. K
 

Chizz

Registered User
Jan 10, 2023
3,768
0
Kent
Alone is physical and fairly easy to deal with. Lonely is in the mind and much harder to deal with.

Yes, many, many sole 24 hr carers are alone and lonely. Can't chat with my OH.
I try to keep in touch with family and friends on a regular'ish rota to try ensure I get some adult conversation in the week.
 

Gosling

Volunteer Host
Aug 2, 2022
1,881
0
South West UK
Hello @Kittica and I just wanted to say welcome to this friendly and supportive forum. There is a wealth of shared experience of dementia to be found here, so I am glad you have found us.

I am sorry to read about your husband, and that he is now in care home accommodation. Try to take some comfort from the fact that he is safe 24/7 and cared for. It does take some adjusting to, for him, and most certainly for you. I sincerely hope this forum gives you a place where you are not alone; where you can safely share with others how you are feeling to people who understand. We can and try to all help each other. Take care.
 

Ronnie G

New member
May 20, 2024
1
0
Texas
Hello, not sure how to start here. Just got diagnosed-not sure what to do now. About to retire in January. Hope to learn and navigate the journey as best as possible for everyone around me.
 

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