Thank you. Any advice or suggestions will be most welcomeWelcome to the forum @JHB I do hope you’ll get more support than I can offer as far as managing a catheter.
What resonated with me was your comment about wondering if this behaviour had a connection to phases of the moon.
My husband was a cancer birthday and he was affected by the moon as long as I knew him which was 54 years.
If being affected by the moon causes this level of confusion I’ve no idea how it can be managed or indeed if anyone will believe you.
I hope you will find other members more knowledgeable and helpful.
Well hello and welcome for me too JHB from me too.
You think a man's catheter is a difficult thing to deal with, try it as a man when it's your wife and your mum, been there done that got the
P-shirt like a T-shirt but best use a boil wash whatever the washing instructions say. K and
Hide the scissors and buy him some boxing gloves, try using a pair of scissors with those on, isn't easy. Please appreciate I say this lightheartedly let's see what others suggest. KThank you for the laundry advice. I don't find dealing with the catheter difficult nor the soggy outcomes. What is difficult is him cutting the catheter off with a pair of scissors near delicate parts of his anatomy and last night actually removing the entire catheter. Fortunately the balloon had virtually deflated. I'm just hoping for ideas on how to prevent him tampering with the whole system .
I feel for you l have been doing it for 13 never got used to it my relative, had narcissistic traits way before dementia & had alcoholism. I also done so much inner work to resolve my issues, with his violence before dementia . But being the main carer ,and my attempts at arranging care have been traumatic , which is an understatement.Hi all - new person on here, currently struggling with a Mum who has undiagnosed dementia and will not go to the Doctors about it. I live about 20 minutes drive away and pop over a few times a week to get her shopping and check on paperwork. Issues are that she will not accept any other help at all, despite her mobility now being bad, and being vulnerable because of her memory issues.
Thankfully she can still look after herself, but since my father died a few years ago, her narcissism is out of control, and it is all about her and her issues, without any thought for family or friend's feelings. She is also living with breast cancer, and is on a cocktail of pills, which she forgets to take, and gets very annoyed about if you try to help her with them. Her surgery have now issued dosset boxes, and I just pop the next week's box in the kitchen for her to take when I am up there. Thankfully she isn't violent but she can be very snappy and hurtful to those trying to help her.
I think the worst thing for me is that I don't get a lot of help from family or friends, some firmly don't want to get involved, but are quite happy to visit and chat, which at least gives her some company (as I work full time). My brother is not good, (we don't talk very well as it is), and she has just one good friend left now who understands, but doesn't get too involved.
It has been very helpful to me to realise I am not alone, as it is hard to process your parent turning into a hateful, spiteful and contradictory person. My mum has always had traits of this in her (being a teenager around her was hell...) but we had repaired our relationship well until she started showing signs, now it is like being 13 again. It upsets me a lot, as it brings up things from my teenage years I thought I had resolved, but I also realise lots of people on here are living with a lot worse! I take my hat off to you all for your bravery and stoicism in the face of this awful disease.
Hello and welcome first of all from me and the rest of us I'm sure. Post whenever your ready, all here to help if and when we can. KHello My mum has had Alzheimers now for 10years at least, the past 2 she has been completly bedbound.
Thank you. My wife was referred to the Adult Mental Health team, and we took her twice to see the doctor in charge, for memory tests. There was loss of cognitive ability, and memory issues. The second one was very slightly improved, and he referred her back to the GP, where all contact stopped. She managed the memory test better, maybe because she knew what was happening, but things are gradually worsening.Hello Michael @Michael_1948 and welcome from me also to this friendly and supportive forum. There is a wealth of shared experience of dementia to be found here so I am glad you have found us.
I'm also pleased to hear your daughter recommended this forum.
I'm sorry to read about your wife's confusion and memory loss. Do you actually have a diagnosis I wonder?
Anyway, do have a good look around the forums and ask any particular questions you may like to. Use the forum too as a place to let off a bit of steam when you need to. People here understand.
Hello @Neutronflower and welcome to the Dementia Support Forum. You have been going through a lot recently especially if you do not get much help from family and friends. When you are ready you might find it useful to start a thread on the 'I care for a person with dementia' area. There you can ask questions, talk about how you feel or just have a rant when needed.Hi all - new person on here, currently struggling with a Mum who has undiagnosed dementia and will not go to the Doctors about it. I live about 20 minutes drive away and pop over a few times a week to get her shopping and check on paperwork. Issues are that she will not accept any other help at all, despite her mobility now being bad, and being vulnerable because of her memory issues.
Thankfully she can still look after herself, but since my father died a few years ago, her narcissism is out of control, and it is all about her and her issues, without any thought for family or friend's feelings. She is also living with breast cancer, and is on a cocktail of pills, which she forgets to take, and gets very annoyed about if you try to help her with them. Her surgery have now issued dosset boxes, and I just pop the next week's box in the kitchen for her to take when I am up there. Thankfully she isn't violent but she can be very snappy and hurtful to those trying to help her.
I think the worst thing for me is that I don't get a lot of help from family or friends, some firmly don't want to get involved, but are quite happy to visit and chat, which at least gives her some company (as I work full time). My brother is not good, (we don't talk very well as it is), and she has just one good friend left now who understands, but doesn't get too involved.
It has been very helpful to me to realise I am not alone, as it is hard to process your parent turning into a hateful, spiteful and contradictory person. My mum has always had traits of this in her (being a teenager around her was hell...) but we had repaired our relationship well until she started showing signs, now it is like being 13 again. It upsets me a lot, as it brings up things from my teenage years I thought I had resolved, but I also realise lots of people on here are living with a lot worse! I take my hat off to you all for your bravery and stoicism in the face of this awful disease.
Hi @Fazvbang - welcome to this forum from me too. I feel for you and know where you're at. My OH has been bedbound since July 2022, so coming up for 2 years.Hello My mum has had Alzheimers now for 10years at least, the past 2 she has been completly bedbound.