Our magic bitter sweet moments 🥰🥰🥰

Eddcorner

Registered User
Aug 27, 2020
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This morning, whilst I was preparing my OH's breakfast and cup of tea, I asked her what music she might like today. From the limited choice I gave her from our many many iPad playlists through Spotify she said how about some 1960's ?
I put on the playlist - random play - and the first tune that came up was Little Eva singing "Do the Locomotion"
So, naturally, I started to dance (or at least that's what I call it).
Without moment's hesitation my OH said "What would my mum say if she could see you now!"
"Would she join in?" I asked
"She might" and laughed. What a moment to start the day!😆😆
Class act as per usual! I love her spark... dancing? Personally I could only do thrash, could never master the poppy thingy 😆
 

sdmhred

Registered User
Jan 26, 2022
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Surrey
These moments are so precious 🥰🥰

Quite a traumatic few days - mum has hemorrhagic cystitis. The less I say about that the better #carnage is all you need to know.

BUT today was rather special as she got out in a vehicle for the first time since mid November 😀😀 The home tries to rota residents so everyone who wants to gets out in the minibus - today was our turn. It was perfect for mum - a round trip of 2 hours with a stop for hot chocolate- just through the countryside- she smiled the whole way round 🥰🥰 and interestingly her personal care immediately after was so much calmer than usual.

we’ve also discovered one of the wanderers here has been honoured by the Queen and worked with the HRH’s! My head can’t quite deal with the fact that he is now wearing my Dad’s PJ’s as he only had one pair of his own.
 

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SeaSwallow

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Oct 28, 2019
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So good to read that your mum enjoyed the trip out, but so sad that the wanderer only had one pair of PJs.
 

Eddcorner

Registered User
Aug 27, 2020
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These moments are so precious 🥰🥰

Quite a traumatic few days - mum has hemorrhagic cystitis. The less I say about that the better #carnage is all you need to know.

BUT today was rather special as she got out in a vehicle for the first time since mid November 😀😀 The home tries to rota residents so everyone who wants to gets out in the minibus - today was our turn. It was perfect for mum - a round trip of 2 hours with a stop for hot chocolate- just through the countryside- she smiled the whole way round 🥰🥰 and interestingly her personal care immediately after was so much calmer than usual.

we’ve also discovered one of the wanderers here has been honoured by the Queen and worked with the HRH’s! My head can’t quite deal with the fact that he is now wearing my Dad’s PJ’s as he only had one pair of his own.
All I see are two pairs of feet on bed ;) insanely jealous!! Great to see your mum getting out though, our own trips have been impacted by the weather and RA - can give a massive therapeutic lift regardless of how long or destination.

Only had one pair of his own? Poor chap! And mixing with royal celebs... wowser ;)
 

sdmhred

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Jan 26, 2022
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Surrey
Difficult day here…..a resident who joined us on the outing on Tuesday fell and broke his hip this morning. The family have decided not for hospital….the staff are all in tears 😢😢😢 he is such a lovely, gentle man 😢😢😢

Another chap was taken in yesterday for severe constipation…..and a lady whipped out a faeces covered pad in the lounge just before lunch 🙈🙈

Mum still recovering from her uti ….I’m completely out of routine but did manage a long walk this afternoon and called in at my friends house who conveniently live just by the home …… I do need to start addressing my own house chaos but being with mum and my new friends with d is just far more fun and interesting 🙈🙈
 

sdmhred

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Jan 26, 2022
2,317
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Surrey
The entertainment has continued today!

My sister was also down so mum was hoisted into her wheelchair and we set off for the local Tesco for our hot chocolate. En route we were horrified to see the care homes residen INDOOR cat in a garden. She came to her name when called. I was called a hero as I marched her in my arms back to the home…..on return after our walk the staff were in hoots…..I had catnapped the home’s cat doppelgänger 🙈🙈😱😱 It had to be retrieved and returned to where it was picked up from … I alas have form 🙈🙈 once in my paid role I was asked to collect and take 3 cats from a property to the cattery whilst the resident was hospitalised…job done …..until it turns up that the client had adopted a neighbour’s cat and so this one was illegally detained 🙈🙈🙈

We also made using the hoist much more fun by having a destination 🤣🤣🤣 As the pilot is a lovely lady from Zimbabwe we landed at Harare - much laughter!

The poor chap with the broken hip is struggling to have his pain managed. The systems here on a Sunday are so rubbish that the nurse had to drive an hours round trip to collect the medication he needs 🥲🥲🥲

Ive decided at home amongst all the chaos to create some ‘havens’. I started today - got my TV back up and running - going to have a lovely TV space!
 

SeaSwallow

Volunteer Moderator
Oct 28, 2019
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@sdmhred That did make me laugh, I wonder what the penalty is for being a catnapper. :eek:
What a brilliant idea of creating a haven amongst the chaos. Relax and enjoy.
 

colpatben

Registered User
Dec 27, 2022
559
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@sdmhred That did make me laugh, I wonder what the penalty is for being a catnapper. :eek:
What a brilliant idea of creating a haven amongst the chaos. Relax and enjoy.
Maybe the threat of the 'Cat of Nine Tails' would put paid to catnapping

My haven is our garage.

Only joking.

Colin
 

Eddcorner

Registered User
Aug 27, 2020
1,693
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The entertainment has continued today!

My sister was also down so mum was hoisted into her wheelchair and we set off for the local Tesco for our hot chocolate. En route we were horrified to see the care homes residen INDOOR cat in a garden. She came to her name when called. I was called a hero as I marched her in my arms back to the home…..on return after our walk the staff were in hoots…..I had catnapped the home’s cat doppelgänger 🙈🙈😱😱 It had to be retrieved and returned to where it was picked up from … I alas have form 🙈🙈 once in my paid role I was asked to collect and take 3 cats from a property to the cattery whilst the resident was hospitalised…job done …..until it turns up that the client had adopted a neighbour’s cat and so this one was illegally detained 🙈🙈🙈

We also made using the hoist much more fun by having a destination 🤣🤣🤣 As the pilot is a lovely lady from Zimbabwe we landed at Harare - much laughter!

The poor chap with the broken hip is struggling to have his pain managed. The systems here on a Sunday are so rubbish that the nurse had to drive an hours round trip to collect the medication he needs 🥲🥲🥲

Ive decided at home amongst all the chaos to create some ‘havens’. I started today - got my TV back up and running - going to have a lovely TV space!
And I thought me and mum were a bit shady with liberating daffodils... a whole new level @sdmhred regarding that poor cat, shame, shame lass haha 🤡 ;)

Good to get your 'TV safe haven' sorted, binge a boxset or two!!
 

sdmhred

Registered User
Jan 26, 2022
2,317
0
Surrey
It shall take a while for me to live down the cat saga I think 🙈🙈

Anyway back to work tomorrow…..I’m pleased the last few days I have got back into my routine of having a long walk first thing. Sets me up for the day and I feel like I have got something done for me before the rest starts…

Im finding the rest of the day isn’t quite routined yet….mum is sometimes up, sometimes not, occasionally up in the morning..or the afternoon 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ I want to be with her when she’s up so we can enjoy the rare hours together ….so feel a little like we can’t settle into a pattern ….today tho for the first time in ages Whilst she was napping I actually thought, what shall I do?? Rather than have a load of things I needed to do 😀😀😀 (well apart from clearing the chaos which will be ongoing for ages). TV area isn’t quite ready but getting there….3 kitchen drawers done….bathroom sink nice and shiny …..final utility bills on old flat sorted 😀😀

Thankfully the chap with the broken hip seems much more comfortable with less shouting out. Each day I see a different carer in tears…..theyve struggled to see someone they have cared for in such pain 😢😢

Mum’s uti finally clearing…..have insisted she’s hoisted onto the commode so she’s not forced to soil her pad…we won’t be able to do for ever but I feel for dignity and UTI prevention its important …

CHC postponed for 2 weeks after I had cheekily sent them a v thorough document 🙈🙈🤣🤣 we won’t get it and I’m not sure myself she’s eligible but am using it as a learning curve…..
 

sdmhred

Registered User
Jan 26, 2022
2,317
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Surrey
I had some care home entertainment at lunchtime. I popped in for a late lunch break…mum was finishing off in the dining room. She’s a slow but steady eater just about still managing herself.

I was offered some leftovers to which I now readily accept. The lady who paces likes to ‘help’ and I think thought it was her job to ensure I was fed. She got up and gave Me her plate which I politely declined. She then took the half chewed roast potato from Her hand and carefully placed it under my pile of carrots 🙈🙈😱😱😱 staff were horrified….I thought hilarious tho - if u eat in a dementia dining room anything goes! What I like is that the dining room is full of love - the lady that paces was concerned for me - I’ll take that 🥰🥰 if not her half chewed roast potato 🤣🤣 whether or not i tell her husband when I see Him next 🤔🤔🤔 he’s always up for a chat tho!
 

Neveradullday!

Registered User
Oct 12, 2022
3,462
0
England
I had some care home entertainment at lunchtime. I popped in for a late lunch break…mum was finishing off in the dining room. She’s a slow but steady eater just about still managing herself.

I was offered some leftovers to which I now readily accept. The lady who paces likes to ‘help’ and I think thought it was her job to ensure I was fed. She got up and gave Me her plate which I politely declined. She then took the half chewed roast potato from Her hand and carefully placed it under my pile of carrots 🙈🙈😱😱😱 staff were horrified….I thought hilarious tho - if u eat in a dementia dining room anything goes! What I like is that the dining room is full of love - the lady that paces was concerned for me - I’ll take that 🥰🥰 if not her half chewed roast potato 🤣🤣 whether or not i tell her husband when I see Him next 🤔🤔🤔 he’s always up for a chat tho!
Lovin these reports, @sdmhred
It sounds absolutely fascinating and rewarding being there.
I saw a couple of clips of a Louis Theroux documentary in a US care home, a few months ago - that was really interesting. Can't remember the details, though.
 

Chizz

Registered User
Jan 10, 2023
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Kent
Maybe the husband of the lady who paces would have accepted the half chewed roast potato?
 

canary

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Feb 25, 2014
25,277
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South coast
You were lucky you got offered food sdmhred - in mums care home the Lady Who Paces used to nick food off other peoples plates and eat it in preference to her own food.... If you got a biscuit with your tea the advice from my mum was to eat it quick and she was right - if you didnt, you would suddenly notice that it was gone!
 

Chizz

Registered User
Jan 10, 2023
3,786
0
Kent
So not like an Irish pub I went into, because it had a sign outside advertising "A pint, a pie and a tip for £5"
I couldn't resist. I ordered the pint. and the pie and asked what the tip was. The barman answered "Don't eat the pie!"
 

sdmhred

Registered User
Jan 26, 2022
2,317
0
Surrey
Care home life encompasses everything - joy and laughter, but also sadness. These have sat together this week on the ground floor.

Our poor friend with the broken hip has tonight been put on the syringe driver and his daughter called in. I had chatted with her a few times and she gave me permission to sit with him in the evenings. I’ve surprised myself how much a pleasure and a privilege it has been to accompany him on this final journey. He tended to get distressed of an evening and although the staff are wonderfully attentive and would run when he called, they didn’t have the time to just sit. So mum took second fiddle at times and I sat, held his hand and put on the hymns he loved to listen to. He smiled, kissed my hand and said thankyou. What a gentleman! After 20 mins or so his distress was settled and he went back to sleep.

The staff have really struggled. They’ve never known someone not to go to hospital for a broken bone. I’ve seen tears and looks of just panic and helplessness. But for me it’s been a strangely special week.
 

Chizz

Registered User
Jan 10, 2023
3,786
0
Kent
That @sdmhred is the problem or at least one of the problems of our care system and our health care system - no-one has sufficient time just to sit and hold someone's hand when needed, or to listen to what is said or someone's story (save for hospice staff and specialised nurses (eg Macmillan/Admiral) .
 

sdmhred

Registered User
Jan 26, 2022
2,317
0
Surrey
Yes @Chizz you are right! I have often thought this week how inhumane it would be NOT to sit and comfort a dying man - especially one in distress.
 

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