Just waiting for now. Exhausted. (26F)

~Raine

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Apr 10, 2024
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Update: Got my bloodwork results back today and everything came back normal except for vitamin B12 being on the lower side of normal, so my doctor told me to keep taking my vitamin for that.
Not sure if I should be relieved or more worried now. Still waiting on a reply about the neuropsych referral stuff from my doc.

[Edit: Doctor did reply to me about the referral, sent it to the people who manage the referrals that will send one for me. There's a list though based on when the referral was sent in, so idk when they'll get to me. I'm going to try and find somewhere local in the meantime if it's possible, we'll see.]
 
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Knitandpurl

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Aug 9, 2021
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Good news about the bloods, I have started taking vit B, hoping it improves my word finding which is not as good as it should be. Best of luck with finding a more local specialist.
 

~Raine

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Apr 10, 2024
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Good news about the bloods, I have started taking vit B, hoping it improves my word finding which is not as good as it should be. Best of luck with finding a more local specialist.
Thank you! Fingers crossed I can. I hope your vitamin B works out for you!
 

Knitandpurl

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Aug 9, 2021
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Thank you! Fingers crossed I can. I hope your vitamin B works out for you!
Have also decided to try ‘intermittent fasting’, an ‘In’ thing at the moment in the UK, but claims it can help with ‘brain’ performance. Doing 14 hours fasting, 10 normal, at the moment as seemed to fit with our life style best, and trying to get OH to do too. Only started Monday so no comments to make yet, but I have slept better though that could be a coincidence. How are you today? It’s actually not raining here, which is wonderful as seems to have been raining since mid August last year!!!
 

jay6

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Jun 25, 2023
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Have also decided to try ‘intermittent fasting’, an ‘In’ thing at the moment in the UK, but claims it can help with ‘brain’ performance. Doing 14 hours fasting, 10 normal, at the moment as seemed to fit with our life style best, and trying to get OH to do too. Only started Monday so no comments to make yet, but I have slept better though that could be a coincidence. How are you today? It’s actually not raining here, which is wonderful as seems to have been raining since mid August last year!!!
Sounds interesting. Might be worth trying if it really does help brain performance.
 

~Raine

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Apr 10, 2024
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Have also decided to try ‘intermittent fasting’, an ‘In’ thing at the moment in the UK, but claims it can help with ‘brain’ performance. Doing 14 hours fasting, 10 normal, at the moment as seemed to fit with our life style best, and trying to get OH to do too. Only started Monday so no comments to make yet, but I have slept better though that could be a coincidence. How are you today? It’s actually not raining here, which is wonderful as seems to have been raining since mid August last year!!!
My trouble recalling things/making typos/brain fog has been bugging me quite a bit more the past few days but I'm doing alright otherwise!

It's sunny here today in my area of the USA, we got some Spring rain yesterday so that was nice to see. I think I'll try the intermittent fasting then, wouldn't hurt to try anything at this point tbh.

I have moderate sleep apnea and am trying to get a CPAP(gotta wait until July to do an at home sleep study) so if it does help sleep, that'd be nice!
 

~Raine

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Apr 10, 2024
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Having a hard time today. Still waiting on my referral and nothing is improving. Struggling more with my words and getting confused more easily during conversations and trying to make food.

I hate this so much, I feel like I don't have a future anymore and it's ruining my already poor mental health.
 

Kevinl

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Aug 24, 2013
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Me with an American mum ended up her looking after my wife, both now passed away but life goes on, where there is life there is hope and if you want to swap the temperature where you are from here, feel free but bring a coat or a jumper. K
 

~Raine

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Apr 10, 2024
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Me with an American mum ended up her looking after my wife, both now passed away but life goes on, where there is life there is hope and if you want to swap the temperature where you are from here, feel free but bring a coat or a jumper. K
Always someone here to listen Raine,
Yes please lol. I'd love some more rainy and chilly days. :) Thank you for the kind words.
 

~Raine

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Apr 10, 2024
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Little vent because I'm just not doing well.

Haven't been doing too good the past few days, I feel alot more detached from everything and extremely depressed. Haven't wanted to get out of bed to do anything and I just want to sleep, honestly. I have to be really careful about what I choose to do because it either drains me extremely quickly or I get so depressed noticing how hard of a time I'm having staying focused or remembering that I just give up.

I want to believe this isn't dementia, it's so hard not to think that, though. I have no idea when I'm getting this neuropsych referral finished, and the next person I could see about it would be the neuro taking over for my previous one as I stated before, and that's next month. I'm on the wait list for a sooner appointment if possible but this is killing me.

I'm taking all my vitamins still and trying to eat as healthy as I can in this state, and hoping and praying the 1000mg of Lions Mane I'm taking will help, even if just a bit.

Really sucks when I've hardly been able to be independent my whole life, I start seeing a future for myself moving across the country to be with my closest friends, then everything is halted in it's tracks. My parents don't believe anything is wrong with me still, even though I visibly look like the life is being drained out of me. I feel so isolated.

Edit: I've noticed I've become increasingly apathetic the past month and that only scares me more that it's a form of dementia. Feels great.

Edit: Now I'm concerned that I've developed frontotemporal dementia. That'd be just my luck at 26. I'm so anxious and full of dread now.
 
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DeeCee7

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Oct 13, 2023
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Sorry to hear this @~Raine and it looks like you’re not sleeping so well either at night. Try to stay up in the day so that you can reset your body clock. Try to go for walks, self soothe with taking a bath and using moisturiser afterwards. A body massage might help you relax. Do you have a hobby that you can concentrate on? Puzzles, or crafts? Try not to google diseases, as the descriptions can make you think you have the symptoms. I see you are on the wait list, so that’s a positive. You could try ringing to see if they have had any cancellations? Do talk this through with a helpline. You are doing your best, and that’s all any of us can do. So well done, you are doing well even if you don’t think so right now. Sending you ❤️
 

~Raine

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Apr 10, 2024
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Sorry to hear this @~Raine and it looks like you’re not sleeping so well either at night. Try to stay up in the day so that you can reset your body clock. Try to go for walks, self soothe with taking a bath and using moisturiser afterwards. A body massage might help you relax. Do you have a hobby that you can concentrate on? Puzzles, or crafts? Try not to google diseases, as the descriptions can make you think you have the symptoms. I see you are on the wait list, so that’s a positive. You could try ringing to see if they have had any cancellations? Do talk this through with a helpline. You are doing your best, and that’s all any of us can do. So well done, you are doing well even if you don’t think so right now. Sending you ❤️
I do really enjoy drawing, so I'll try to push through and keep doing that. Yeah, I'm not the best with staying away from Dr. Google sometimes, haha. I'll make myself stay off of it (and get a spray bottle lol.) I do have a patient portal that updates me on cancellations, but I might call them up just in case.
I'll definitely try and take care of myself, I've been pushing to take warm showers too and make myself warm tea. Thank you very much for your kindness <3 It means alot.
 

~Raine

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Apr 10, 2024
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Today's update: Feeling more brain fog noticing more cognitive stuff. Feels like the left side of my head is more effected now. Just kind of taking it as it comes, trying not to worry about it.
 

DeeCee7

Registered User
Oct 13, 2023
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Sorry to hear about the brain fog @~Raine but it’s good that you are able to just let it happen and trying not to worry about it. Some days are just better than others. I hope you can enjoy your warm showers and tea, and your drawings again soon. Do you have a particular theme or style?
 

~Raine

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Apr 10, 2024
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Sorry to hear about the brain fog @~Raine but it’s good that you are able to just let it happen and trying not to worry about it. Some days are just better than others. I hope you can enjoy your warm showers and tea, and your drawings again soon. Do you have a particular theme or style?
It's alright, I figured stressing isn't going to change anything if it is FTD or some other kind of dementia so just trying to enjoy myself the best I can while I wait on tests.

I was able to play some video games for a short period this morning and I'm going to attempt to draw a bit more today, even if it's some small sketches. I also took melatonin and feel a little more rested, and am up during the day now finally, haha.

I usually draw semi-realistic or more cartoony/cutesy. I suppose that would be the term, lol. My profile picture is one of my drawings of myself. I mostly draw characters from my favorite series' and myself, and sometimes anthropomorphic characters and regular animals. I've drawn since I was a kid but only started seriously getting into it around 2010. :)
 

Knitandpurl

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Aug 9, 2021
861
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Lincolnshire
It's alright, I figured stressing isn't going to change anything if it is FTD or some other kind of dementia so just trying to enjoy myself the best I can while I wait on tests.

I was able to play some video games for a short period this morning and I'm going to attempt to draw a bit more today, even if it's some small sketches. I also took melatonin and feel a little more rested, and am up during the day now finally, haha.

I usually draw semi-realistic or more cartoony/cutesy. I suppose that would be the term, lol. My profile picture is one of my drawings of myself. I mostly draw characters from my favorite series' and myself, and sometimes anthropomorphic characters and regular animals. I've drawn since I was a kid but only started seriously getting into it around 2010. :)
I think your profile picture is brilliant. My artistic skills are nil. Have you thought of trying to get a job as an illustrator? After all in this digital age you could basically do it from anywhere in the world? Of course, I don’t know what you do and you may already have a job you love. It’s a wonder talent to have anyway and must be a great release for you. My is, guess what - knitting! Would go potty without it.
 

~Raine

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Apr 10, 2024
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I think your profile picture is brilliant. My artistic skills are nil. Have you thought of trying to get a job as an illustrator? After all in this digital age you could basically do it from anywhere in the world? Of course, I don’t know what you do and you may already have a job you love. It’s a wonder talent to have anyway and must be a great release for you. My is, guess what - knitting! Would go potty without it.
Honestly, I've considered it! It's just difficult to get my name out there because I don't finish alot of my projects, nowadays especially. :( I'm currently unemployed, but I was doing 3D model commissions the past year or two until I fizzled out, which I enjoyed quite a bit.
Anhedonia is really dragging me down at the moment(which is what's worrying me the most, I usually have a good time doing even small things), so it's hard for me to get much enjoyment out of anything since things worsened this past month. I'm really hoping it's all just ADHD burnout and being depressed from the health anxiety.