Social services know everything about my brother including the stealing from mum and the class a drug use in her house and they still choose to not get involved.
Hi
- Thread starter ian01
- Start date
The psychiatrist reported suspected financial abuse. It's mentioned in the full report I got after the memory clinic appointment and it's also mentioned by the GP in mums medical history that she is financial vulnerable.
The safeguarding report from the psychiatrist was the 4th or 5th report that has been made. This situation has had a big impact on my mental health to the point I started self harming as a way of coping so I've seen a lot of medical people myself over the last 3 or 4 months each time explaining the situation with my mum and brother and they made safeguarding reports. Mum had an occupational therapist come to the house a few months ago and she told the OT she knows he steals from her and he's always asking her for money and she sleeps with her purse under her pillow to stop him stealing. The OT made a safeguarding report and as usual nothing happened.
I'd ask CAB if any of the following ideas would be an advantage or detrimental to your situation:
Email the head of social services and make a formal complaint ,and your MP. Years ago I worked for a govt dept and MP enquiries had people 'jumping through hoops'.
If your mum has no capacity then I can't see you would need to tell her you are are applying for deputyship , she's not going to understand is she? I think you can use your mum's money to pay ,although I can see that is difficult if you can't access her account!
Another thing ,could social services be telling you to apply for deputyship as it is in her best interest for that to be under way before they act?? Systems are so complex.
Some of your comments suggest mum does have capacity. Eg permission for pin change and her conversation with OT. Is this why s.s and Police can't act?
Hope CAB can help
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According to a solicitor I recently contacted she said if I applied for deputyship they would have to tell my mum and brother that I was doing it.
Unlikely my brother would apply, he's not very bright if you know what I mean and totally clueless about these type of things.
I edited and added. : some of your comments suggest mum does have capacity. Eg agreement to pin change and conversation with OT . Is this why SS and police can't act?
This sounds very difficult. I think the best thing you can do is have a chat with your mum. Explain you are concerned because you’ve noticed her memory isn’t as good as it used to be. You’ve noticed that she withdraws large amounts of money then misplaced it and can’t remember doing it etc. Explain you are aware of her withdrawing large amounts of money for her son and forgetting she’s done it. That you are concerned that she’s not keeping hood track of her finances and very worried that her finances will get in a mess and cause her problems with not being able to pay her bills. You could also say your brother shouldn’t need to ask her for money as he works full time and doesn’t contribute towards the bills. (Or you may not want to say that if it sparks anger in her thinking you’re trying to cause trouble between them). Also, you dint want her to feel she can’t trust the person she has to live with every day. So perhaps talk about your concern gif her finances then say this is why you feel it may be better to let you handle her finances for her. To keep track of what she’s spending and that bills are being paid etc. Maybe also say you are happy that your brother lives with her as that covers the ‘care’ side. That if reassures you that she has someone there to help her around the house etc and get her medical attention if needed but you feel her finances need looking after too. And introduce the idea that the two of you approach the bank to say you both want control passed over to you and suggest to her that she agree to a POA or deputyship.
I think if you make it all about concern for her in the areas that haven’t been taken care of (finances) rather than accusing your brother or giving her the feeling that you just want access to her money to spend on yourself, it might go well. Just keep it all about how good it is that she has your brother there to care for her but you feel you need to arrange care of her finances too now.
I think if you make it all about concern for her in the areas that haven’t been taken care of (finances) rather than accusing your brother or giving her the feeling that you just want access to her money to spend on yourself, it might go well. Just keep it all about how good it is that she has your brother there to care for her but you feel you need to arrange care of her finances too now.
Update, today I noticed someone had used mums card at a local ATM yesterday and withdrew £50 and mum said it wasn't her. So I took her to the police station to report it, they wouldn't take a report from her because of her memory and confusion but recommended I now keep hold of her card at all times which I've very happy to do. I'm now worried how my brother will react towards this happening as I know he'll be very angry towards mum as it'll now be an end to his stealing money from her. £30 also disappeared from mums handbag yesterday so my brother stole £80 that day.
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£400 for the court plus you usually have to pay for someone to make a declaration of lack of capacity (mums SW did this, but it is becoming harder to get someone to do it now and you may have to pay for a private SW to do it), plus photocopies and postage. All of this can be claimed back from your mum once you are awarded deputyship.
I have emailed the head of adult social services wanting to know why I've received no help.
