Hi, I’m 27 years old my dad has ARBD (alcohol related brain damage) and dementia. He was coping but the last few weeks he has plummeted. Tonight I saw him and he was confused where he was didn’t know which house he was in which he has lived in for the past three years. He was talking about missing my mum like it was yesterday (been separated for 17 years) got to the point where he can’t physically function, eating, dressing etc. I have 3 year old twins so it’s hard to see him as much as I can when he lives 10 miles away, doing driving lessons so I can get to him every day. I’m the only family that will take anything to do with him and he has carers that visit him 3x a day but I feel it is unsafe for him to live alone now and I just don’t know what to do or who to speak to. Waiting for social services to re-evaluate his state. Would really appreciate any advice or feedback from people who have been in a similar position. Thanks
Worried about Dad.
- Thread starter Missp91
- Start date
Welcome to TP @Pfarquhar
I’d let the GP know what’s happening & ask them to visit him or call him in.
Also chase social services.
I’d let the GP know what’s happening & ask them to visit him or call him in.
Also chase social services.
Thank you very much, I have already contacted both but because the worst has happened this weekend I won’t be able to do anything till Monday. It is just so worrying, admitted him to hospital yesterday as he didn’t know where he was to see if they could do anything but nothing was physically wrong so we were sent home. Going to pester the social work again tomorrow. Just hoping someone has been in the same position and tell me what happens next or what their experience was? Thanks
Hello @Pfarquhar
When you contact social services, the key words to use about your dad are `vulnerable adult` , which he is and `at risk`, which he is .
Good luck. I hope you get some action. Please post an update.
When you contact social services, the key words to use about your dad are `vulnerable adult` , which he is and `at risk`, which he is .
Good luck. I hope you get some action. Please post an update.
The first thing to do is check on any physical problem like a stroke or and infection which might have caused the worsening symptoms, having done that (which you have) the next stage is to chase up social services and tell them that there has been a sudden downturn and it is urgent, that he is a vulnerable person who is now at risk.
As he is already having carers going in 3 times a day the likely next step is a care home, so I would start researching care homes and go and look at likely places.
As he is already having carers going in 3 times a day the likely next step is a care home, so I would start researching care homes and go and look at likely places.
Thanks to everyone for taking the time to reply. Myself and one of the carers are working on this together and we are still waiting for the social work to give us a date to come out and they said they’ve marked it as urgent. Also looking into guardianship with a solicitor. I literally have a care home next door to my house and would love to get him in there if possible so I will look into that tomorrow and get more information.
How wonderful.I do hope it works out for you. Please let us know.
I really hope I can get him in there, I know most of the people who work there, three of them being my neighbours so I would be over the moon! I’ll let you know, thanks.
