Yes I have read Tina's post and it is invaluable.
Do look at your own person though. Tina wanted alternative places for her to go, I want just one, cos mum can't find her way around. I also wanted the lounge to be near to her bedroom, hence us paying about £50 a week extra for such a room cos it is supposed to be a double room, but the others available were miles away.
I could add a load of other stuff to consider, but some of it is not provable until your loved one is actually there. How often do they get a bath? Is there a shower? Does your loved one like a shower or is perhaps scared of it? Do religious ministers visit - mum seems to be the only person out of 25 80+ year olds to have any religious connection at all. A representative from her church visits every month (I arranged it), but nobody else seems to bother, I can't quite believe that is right.
Is there an activities co-ordinator? Your parent might like one, just to do armchair exercises, carpet bowls, read poetry, do some painting. Mum enjoyed colouring in some pictures though she has no artistic bent at all. It keep the mind active and hand co-ordination going.
Does the home do trips out? Just a drive into the countryside helps. How often?
All of the above was important to me, so I chose a home which matched. Within weeks the activities co-ordinator was sacked (not up to scratch), the outside trips stopped (no-one able to drive the vehicle) and everything else ceased as well, including baths.
One year one it is improving again. Fingers crossed.
Oh, it is a job, isn't it?
Love
Margaret