1. Splat88

    Splat88 Registered User

    Jul 13, 2005
    I had a real meltdown about three weeks ago, and finally phoned the emergency number I had been given, ( even though it was the wrong one, I asked the clinic for a number to use if I needed advice and didn't want to wait for my next appointment, what I was given was the out of hours emergency number)
    After being moved around from pillar to post and five phone numbers later, I finally get someone who says I should have needs assessments for both of us.
    A nice young lady phoned back and asked questions and that was the last I heard, until today........

    For the last two weeks, MIL has been getting up in the morning sevral times, walking through the front room, going to the toilet, and then taking herself back off to bed. Its now 12 midday and she is still in bed, sleeping. Now, as her room is downstairs and we sleep upstairs ( she lived in a bungalow for the last 30 years, so doesn't even realise there is an upstairs) we don't know if she stays asleep all night.

    I need to ask for some advice, should I take her to the doctor, should I just assume its the dementia and she hasn't got control of her body clock. Or is she il? Its useless to ask her because she wouldn't admit if she was. I phone several numbers again, trying to get some advice, only to be told that they are waiting for the case to be assigned a social worker.

    Its a good job the meltdown didn't last, isn't it?? Anyway, I get more sense from you lot,so what should I do? Go to the GP as suggested by the Old Peoples unit? In my experience, they don't really understand the dementia, last time I was given tablets I was told to make sure she took them on an empty stomach. How do I do that when she is still mobile and sometimes roams from 6am onwards when I get the rest of the house up, getting tea, biscuits and anything else she can find!! I can't lock her in her room, or lock the kitchen!!!
  2. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    Hello Splat88

    Is the behaviour of your MIL really giving you cause for concern or is it just getting on your nerves?
    Is she, or are you, in danger if she gets up in the night?
    Does she appear to be ill?

    If the answer to any of my questions is yes, then you need to seek help quickly.

    If the answer is no and you can ride it, I`d leave well alone.

    As for the medication. My husband was prescribed medication for osteoporosis. This tablet was to be taken once a week, No food was to be taken for at least half an hour after the tablet, and my husband had to remain upright.

    There was no way I could guarantee he would not eat or drink for half an hour, nor was there any way I could be sure he would not go back to bed. So the tablet has been discontinued.

    There`s only so much you can do. :(

    Love xx
  3. Splat88

    Splat88 Registered User

    Jul 13, 2005
    Hello Sylvia

    No, she has a bit of a cough, and she's a bit chesty but she doesn't seem to be ill enough to sleep this late.
    It's not getting on my nerves, she just seems to be tired all the time, even when she gets up she's dozing again in a couple of hours. I know how she feels and I'm only in my 50's not my 80's!!!
    It was calcium tablets for osteoporosis she has been given too, I haven't been able to give them to her for the same reasons. Mind you, she has a stress fracture of the cervical vertebrae due to osteoporosis and scoliosis so its a bit worrying. She also has problems with her breathing for the same reason, the curvature prevents her from breathing in enough.
    This is why I needed to know if it was a progression of the dementia or something else.
  4. Canadian Joanne

    Canadian Joanne Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 8, 2005
    Toronto, Canada
    Hi Splat,
    My mother had several drowsy phases. A couple were caused by medication but she did have a few which were related to her disease. These occurred when she was more cognitively aware so I think she slept to get away from her situation. My interpretation only, you understand.

    I agree with Sylvia, if everything is okay, go with the flow & let her sleep.
  5. citybythesea

    citybythesea Registered User

    Mar 23, 2008
    coast of texas
    I agree with everyone. With mom she would go thru phases like that. Getting her night and day mixed up. The more she stayed at home the more it happened. Even toward the end, when she was bed bound. I started leaving the TV on 24/7 because I would come into her room and she would be sitting quietly in the dark. I didn't want her lonely so it got left on when I wasn't with her.

    I also wonder if she is doing this because of the fracture and the congestion (CHESTY) My ex husband fractured his vertibrae and after he was allowed to get up he preferred standing as it was more comfortable. Mom preferred standing or sitting very upright when she was congested. Just an idea. HUGS for you.


  6. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    SW Scotland
    Hi Splat

    Confusing night and day is quite common in dementia. Several people in John's home sleep most of the day, then get up for cups of tea in the night. John on the other hand sleeps night and day!

    If that is the only problem, I'd try not to worry about it, though if it's disturbing your sleep, that could be a problem.

    But if you have any concerns about infection, I'd take your MIL to the GP as soon as possible. Why not take a urine sample at the same time? As we know, infections can have devastating effects, and are better treated as quickly as possible.
  7. Splat88

    Splat88 Registered User

    Jul 13, 2005
    Thanks everyone, I've decided to take her to the doctors under protest ( there's nothing wrong with me, I always cough like that, its habit) just in case it is a chest infection.

    I think the drowsiness came on before the cough, and she is perfectly safe at night so I'll just get the cough checked out. I just wondered if sleeping day AND night was normal, as far as anything can be normal.
  8. Lynne

    Lynne Registered User

    Jun 3, 2005
    Hello Splat

    My Mum too, also interpreted as above. But I find that if I let her stay in bed later than noon/lunchtime, she is much more disorientated as to what time of day/night it is (especially with the long hours of daylight we have at the moment) and is more likely to get up & roam around the house in the night looking for me when I'm trying to catch up on some ZZZZs. As I tend to sleep 'with one ear open' it does disturb me, which doesn't improve anyone's lot, so I try to encourage her to sleep when I do. (If she just goes to the loo & puts herself back to bed, I don't get up unless I feel something's amiss.)

    Best wishes
  9. alfjess

    alfjess Registered User

    Jul 10, 2006
    south lanarkshire

    My Mum was also prescribed this medication.

    There was no way I could monitor it, so therefore, it was a waste of time and also added stress, when we had major problems, anyway, in getting her to take any medication.

    As Slyvia said, there is only so much you can do.


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