Wandering

[Jss1]

Good morning, I’m new to the forum and hoped someone might have some advice. My mother in law has vascular dementia and is becoming increasingly confused. She is in denial about her diagnosis and believes there is nothing wrong. She has started to wander at all times of the day, looking for her mum and sister (no longer around). We live close by and she is regularly banging on our door in distress. Last night she woke us at 10.30pm, asking why my husband was ignoring her (he isn’t), he had not answered her 5 missed calls as he has to be up for work at 3.30am, we were in bed, she then came to our house, banging the door and woke us and our 9 year old son who has to be up for school. She frequently comes down to our house (often 6 times a day), she looks through the windows and letterbox. I’ve no idea what to do, but, we are at the end of our tether and can’t carry on like this.

 

[Bunpoots]

Good morning @Jss1

I think this is one of the most difficult things to deal with! When a person with dementia starts to wander it’s a sign that they’re not safe to live on their own anymore and it’s very difficult to keep them safe even if they live with a partner or a family.

I think it might be time to consider a carehome for your mother in law to keep her safe and help to ease her distress. She would have company all day and, in a good dementia care home, nighttime too.
Please don’t consider moving your mother in law in with you as it sounds as if she’s starting to no longer understand the difference between day and night and none of you would get any sleep!