Hi MaryP
Does your husband cry when you aren't there, or is he OK? Have you spoken to the care manager or his key worker? Do you have a CPN involved? Maybe anti- depressant medication would help.
After leaving my parent's care home in tears, often. I found out, that when I am not there, Mum is nearly fine.
Mum pleads with me not to leave her.
Normally, I leave at tea time and she wants me to come and eat with them, then gets really agitated when I say I can't. I think, this is discouraged by the care home, although I have never put it to the test, I use tea time as a distraction, so that I can leave.
The other day, when I was tip- toeing past the dining room, on my way out, there was Mum trying to persuade another resident's visitor to eat with her. It makes me feel less guilty, that it isn't just me she wants.
Hope things settle down and improve for you and your family so that you can enjoy your visits with your husband as much as it is possible.
Love
Alfjess