1. ROSEANN

    ROSEANN Registered User

    Oct 1, 2006
    909
    staffordshire
    Hi Connie
    Good to see your update on Lionel and so glad that his cousin has kept in touch.people like that are worth their weight in gold.
    Like you we too have a daughter who dos not acknowledge her father but I have to say that I have now become very hardened towards her.
    We still have another daughter and son who are great and love their Dad to bits and are always helping me,as to the other one along with alot of other people they forget the old saying that we all grow old one day.
    Look after yourself
    Love Roseann
     
  2. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    that does sound positive xx
     
  3. Canadian Joanne

    Canadian Joanne Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 8, 2005
    16,125
    Toronto, Canada
    Connie,
    Glad to hear that Lionel is eating & drinking well. My mother is also going through some eating problems, which is very unusual for her. We are going to a minced diet, with pureed soup and we are also going to change the timing of her meds, as she's sleeping a great deal. When she's drowsy & eating, she does tend to choke so hopefully these measures will sort things out in a few weeks.

    There are always new challenges, aren't there? As my cousin once said "Just when you get used to the game, they move the goal posts."
     
  4. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    Connie:

    We have not heard about Lionel lately - please update us
    Jan
     
  5. connie

    connie Registered User

    Mar 7, 2004
    9,519
    Frinton-on-Sea
    Valentine's day 2008

    Visited my darling today armed with flowers and a card.
    My grandson came with me. Lionel was in good form, although he never acknowledged Michael even once in the 4 hours we were there.

    I am trying now not to obsess as to whether he 'knows' me or not, but just enjoy my time with him.
    Lionel 2007
    valentine.JPG

    Looked back to last year, what a lovely time that was. He even, with the help of a carer, wote me a card, in spidery, inebriated writing. This year, he could not even register that I was showing him a card.

    I find it hard to watch him slowly disappear, for that is what is happening. However, on a positive note, he is still eating and drinking well.
    We did nothing special today, just sat and held his hand, and of course, fed him as usual.

    He was exhausted after we put him back to bed at 3.30, so was sound asleep when we left. I was glad of Michaels company today, it was hard to keep up the brave front, but that is all I can do.

    Lionel today:[/ATTACH]
     

    Attached Files:

  6. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,708
    Kent
    He looks gaunt Connie, even though he`s eating well.
     
  7. BeckyJan

    BeckyJan Registered User

    Nov 28, 2005
    18,972
    Derbyshire
    Connie: Well done for posting such lovely photos. My heart goes out to you. Love Jan
     
  8. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    #248 Margarita, Feb 14, 2008
    Last edited: Feb 14, 2008
    I remember that photo in 07 , Lionel does look like to me his lost weight.


    My mother not at that stage yet , but I do like the way you put the photo together so you can look back at the lovely times like you say

    At the stage Lionel is I do read a lot about feelings, memory may go , but they feeling do not ( If you don't mind me saying, asking ) how they still respond to touch .

    Does Lionel respond to you when you hold his hand kiss his face . Not as husband or wife but just as a person if you get what I mean
     
  9. connie

    connie Registered User

    Mar 7, 2004
    9,519
    Frinton-on-Sea
    Yes Margarita, I know what you mean.

    Depends. If he is agitated in any way, he just pulls his hands away, but when he is calm he does allow me to stroke his hands.
    I still 'steal' kisses from him. This does not always make him happy.......but I have to try.
     
  10. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    Thank - you for sharing God bless you both xx :)
     
  11. TinaT

    TinaT Registered User

    Sep 27, 2006
    7,095
    Bolton
    Connie, not knowing what Lionel looked like a few years ago, I think he still looks handsome and I'm not surprised you still steal kisses from him. I don't even know if my grandson knows his grandad is ill. I haven't heard from him for a long time. It must have been difficult keeping a brave face in front of your grandson. No matter how practised we are at putting on the smile, it is hard not to show how we realy feel xx TinaT
     
  12. Canadian Joanne

    Canadian Joanne Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 8, 2005
    16,125
    Toronto, Canada
    He's still a handsome man and he's still your Lionel.
     
  13. gigi

    gigi Registered User

    Nov 16, 2007
    7,788
    East Midlands
    Dear Connie,

    I think Lionel looks very comfortable and peaceful!

    Thanks for the photos...I understand why you want to steal kisses from him...:)

    Love Gigi xx
     
  14. lesmisralbles

    lesmisralbles Account Closed

    Nov 23, 2007
    5,543
    Connie

    My heart goes out to you both.
    Steal all the kisses you can, well, it's not stealing, it is what he would want you to have.
    Barb XX
     
  15. CraigC

    CraigC Registered User

    Mar 21, 2003
    6,630
    London
    Thanks for sharing these pictures Connie.
    I love catching up on this thread :)
     
  16. louise@weinprop

    louise@weinprop Registered User

    May 12, 2005
    22
    Dear Connie - I have always followed Lionel's journey as he reminds me so much of my husband who is 3 years younger and is now in a day care centre as I have to work full time to "keep the nails in the roof" I drop him off in the morning, and pick him up in the afternoon - Through your invaluable postings I am no longer afraid of the future, and know what to expect, although every case can be different. All I can say is Godbless you both and thank you for all the help and advice you have given us all, I don't know how I would have coped without it, as there is not much assistance here in South Africa. Take care and give Lionel a hug from us here in South Africa.
    Louise
     
  17. christine_batch

    christine_batch Registered User

    Jul 31, 2007
    3,388
    Buckinghamshire
    Dear Louise,
    It is so nice that when someone has written about their personal experience, it has helped someone.
    I wish you the very best.
    Christine
     
  18. connie

    connie Registered User

    Mar 7, 2004
    9,519
    Frinton-on-Sea
    Minor 'glitch'

    Just back from my visit to Lionel today.

    The home phoned me yesterday to say the tilt mechanism on Lionels chair was not working. Consequently they could not use the chair.

    I telephoned the suppliers who agreed to send someone to look at it. I was with him today, He was in bed of course, as he has no ability to sit upright in a chair.

    Such a shame. It is far more difficult to feed him, and with the side bars up on his bed, very ackward to sit and hold his hand even.

    Have to admit he looked comfortable though.

    100_0839.JPG

    Left the care home a little early so as to be able to call in at the suppliers. Wanted to impress on them the urgency , and the impact on his situation..........early closing today.

    Do hope it can be fixed soon. Such a shame to see him bedridden when it is not strictly necessary.

    Go to visit Lionel these days with no prior expectations. (Tip from Brucie)


    Am trying to think of my visits as blank pages. When I have a 'good' visit I mentally store the page at the front of my imaginary loose leaf folder.
    Not so good visits go to the back, after all I won't want to remember them too often.

    My own personal 'memory' book.
     
  19. Brucie

    Brucie Registered User

    Jan 31, 2004
    12,413
    near London
    you are a gem Connie!

    Love the loose leaf folder idea!

    The chairs get a lot of hard handling and constant use in Jan's case. There have been several occasions when the control cable for her manual chair snapped, and her new electrically operated one requires regular charging - something the staff occasionally forget to do.
     
  20. gigi

    gigi Registered User

    Nov 16, 2007
    7,788
    East Midlands
    Dear Connie..not just a gem..an inspiration...the loose leaf folder is a brilliant idea..whatever stage we're faced with..thankyou!!:)
    He really does look comfy....

    Love Gigi xx
     

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